One reason and one reason only could be responsible for my presence at my father’s law office today. That reason was the woman who gave birth to me. My mother had asked me to see him, and so I agreed, even though I’d rather take a swim in the Charles River. The fact that I would prefer immersing myself into a polluted-as-fuck body of water over meeting with my dad spoke volumes.
The truth? I love my mother . . . but I honestly couldn’t say the same about my father. Harsh as it was to acknowledge, my pragmatism told me I wasn’t the first son to feel this way about a parent. History was filled with examples.
I dreaded this meeting with him because I knew whatever message he wanted to deliver to me personally wasn’t anything I would want to hear. Nothing he ever imparted was good news, but this felt like walking into an ambush. To say we had a stiff relationship was a polite way of describing it. I kept myself guarded because I had to. Having your father sitting on the First Circuit Court of Appeals would probably do it for most people. The fact I practiced law in the same city required the appearance of family solidarity even if there was none. I had a fuck-ton of valid reasons for feeling the way I did.
So, guarded it would be. Even though I’d been in his company at family dinners and holiday occasions, I hadn’t been here in his office since the day I’d left it five years ago. The feelings of anger and disgust simmered just below the surface where I’d forced them to stay. After this I’d need a release to bring me back down to level. I knew where I’d be heading tonight. Annnnnd wasn’t the irony just fucking beautiful considering where I was right now?
“He’s ready for you now, James.” Patricia’s smile held a touch of sympathy. She probably knew the reason for my summons. My father, the judge, only hired the best, and every lawyer with half a brain understood a smooth running office existed in direct correlation to the skills of his or her legal secretary.
“Thanks. Oh, before I forget, tell your son to get in touch with Marguerite at my offices if he’s interested in an internship.” Patricia’s oldest son was a first year law student at Suffolk and probably a smart kid if he was anything like his mom.
“Oh, that’s so kind. I know Chase will jump at the opportunity, James.” She smiled her genuine thanks before leading me into my father’s inner sanctum.
He tracked me with his eyes as I entered the room. I had to work fucking hard to keep a lid on my emotions and stand there impassively. I was on enemy turf for as long as this meeting lasted. I thought of my mother and that helped to keep my feet planted, otherwise I’d be out the door and down on the street where I could breathe again.
“Sit down, son.”
I settled into one of his soft leather chairs and leaned back with an expression of relaxed comfort. An acting performance that should probably earn me an Academy Award because it really felt like I was being ass-fucked on a bed of jagged nails. I probably was about to be but just didn’t know it yet.
“Thank you for coming today. I realize your mother had to persuade you.”
I kept my eyes forward and ignored the calculated barb. “How is Mom?” I deflected.
“Your mother is very well as she always is.” It was probably a lie, but I’d learned long ago my parent’s relationship was not my battle to fight. “The reason I’ve asked you for a private meeting is to share my news. You need to know what’s coming.”
I stared back and said nothing. There wasn’t a thing on earth that could’ve compelled me to ask him for the information. I was unable to pretend that much with my father. All of my energy was taken up just by my presence here in the first place. I knew my silent disinterest rankled him. And I fucking loved that it did.
“Ted Robinson’s recent cancer diagnosis has ended his political career.”
“You know what they say about karma,” I answered. All I could envision in my head was the darkly beautiful goddess that was Karma swooping in for her well-deserved dues, because Ted Robinson shared space on the same list with my dad. Cut from exactly the same cloth. “Besides, he has Mrs. Robinson to care for his every need now so he can certainly take some comfort in that.”
Bitch, please.
The idea of Leah nursing her sick husband back to health was so outrageous even I had to call bullshit on my own inner monologue. Robinson would abso-fucking-lutely have private in-home nursing care, because his adoring wife certainly couldn’t soil her hands cleaning up his piss and puke.
“It’s time to let go of whatever happened in the past, James. It’s done. Move on to the new.”