“You did?” How did I not know this?
“I did. He’s a nice kid.” He grins at me as he sets up the baby’s car seat in the backseat of the truck. “But I didn’t want him to know I thought so.”
36
Katie
My heart is tripping like crazy as we get out of the truck at the restaurant and Jake slips his hand into mine. “You look really beautiful,” he says. His eyes slide slowly up and down my body.
“Thank you,” I say quietly as I push a lock of hair behind my ear. I feel like I’m sixteen again, rather than a thirty-five-year-old woman with four children and a stalker. “You look really handsome.” I reach up to touch his face, but at the last minute I pull my hand back. He sets the car seat down, reaches for my hand, and lays it on his cheek.
“You can touch me,” he says. My insides do that flippy thing again.
“Okay.” His jaw is scruffy but soft. “I like this.” I grin at him.
He turns his head and kisses my palm. Then he grins. “Let’s go eat.”
The restaurant is directly on the lake, and it’s early enough that it’s not yet packed. I see Jake slip folded-up money into the hostess’s hand and she leads us to a secluded area on the deck. No one else is out here and it’s quiet and peaceful.
“Is this area even open?” I ask the waitress.
She grins at me. “It is now.”
She helps Jake set the car seat up in a free chair that she flips over for stability, and puts Hank right next to Jake’s knee.
“Did you do this?” I ask, looking at Jake and the perfect setting.
“Maybe.” He grins. He grabs the arm of my chair and yanks it closer to him. I squeal and he laughs.
“You still have moves, Jake.”
He stares into my eyes. “You are so beautiful.”
My breath catches. “Jake—”
And then he kisses me. First, his lips touch the corners of my mouth, and then the tip of my nose, and then, right when I think I’m going to go crazy, his lips touch mine.
His hand slides around to the back of my neck and he holds me close while his lips devour mine. He sucks my lower lip between his, and gently touches his tongue to mine. I moan against his lips. He pulls back ever so slightly. “Too much?” he whispers.
“Not nearly enough,” I say.
The waitress clears her throat and Jake and I spring apart.
“I’ll come back,” she says with a giggle and she walks away.
I press my hands to my hot cheeks. Jake opens my menu and laughs. “Pick out some food.”
The waitress comes back with glasses of water and takes our order.
“So,” I say to break the silence at the table.
“So.” Jake laughs and takes a sip of his water.
“What do you want from me, Jake?” I suddenly blurt out. I drop my face into my hands because I’m even more embarrassed asking this question than I was when the waitress caught us kissing.
Jake’s green eyes stare into mine. “You really don’t know, do you Katie? You have no idea how I feel about you.”
“How do you feel about me, Jake?” I whisper back.
“I never wanted to be a father,” Jake says.
“Oh.” I sit back. My world is crumbling beneath my feet, and I hold tightly to the arms of my chair to settle myself.
“Stop it,” he chides. He takes my hand in his. “Stop it, now. I didn’t mean that the way it sounded. Can I explain?”
“Please do.”
“Laura always wanted a baby, and I really didn’t. She talked me into it, and then making a baby became a job. It sucked all the joy out of it. When I imagined fatherhood, I imagined some little snot-nosed brat waking me up at all hours of the night, kids crying for food at inconvenient times, and someone taking Laura away from me at his or her own whim. I didn’t want kids. But then I met yours…” His voice trails off.
“And what did you think?” I hold my breath.
“They were a part of you, so I had no choice but to love them at first sight.” He chuckles. “Trixie woke me up last night because she said there was a blue raccoon under her bed and Sally was too big to go under there and look.”
“And you’re so much smaller than Sally.” I laugh. I had no idea she was waking Jake up. “I’m sorry she woke you.”
“I’m not. I had to get out some blue raccoon spray.”
“There’s blue raccoon spray?”
“A bottle of air freshener. I sprayed it under her bed and all was well. Then I stayed with her until she fell asleep. Sally sneezed for a good half hour and Alex woke up to ask me who farted.” He chuckles.
I laugh too. “I’m so sorry. I’ll tell her not to wake you anymore.”
“Oh, please don’t,” he says. “I loved it. It wasn’t a chore. It was nice.”
“You didn’t sign on for fatherhood.”
“I think I would. If you wanted me to, that is.” He coughs into his fist and his cheeks turn pink. “I mean…if you wanted me to be their dad, I’d be honored.”