She licks her lips and nods again.
“Are you scared of what people will say? Does it really mean that much to you? If it does, I’m willing to give you time.”
She stops breathing. “Give me time for what?”
“To accept this. You and I are going to happen. Josh was right. He gave me a push in the right direction. You and I never stopped happening. Just because a wedge was forced between us to stop the momentum doesn’t mean we stopped.”
Her chest expands as she inhales, her fingers rubbing Sirius’ neck. “Okay.”
“Okay what?”
“We are happening. Did you have to drag me all the way here to make a point?”
I tug my hair with my fingers and shake my head. “You are as frustrating as you are beautiful.”
She rolls her eyes, trying to hide the smile fighting to break free. “Can I go home now? I kind of need to get some sleep. I have an early delivery tomorrow morning.”
I nod, glance down at her bare feet. Reaching down to her lap, I pick Sirius up and put him back on the couch. I take Nor’s hands in mine, pull her up and scoop her in my arms. Her lips part and I feel air brush my cheek. The urge to kiss the living shit out of her kicks in, but I know if I do, I won’t stop.
I pick her up in my arms, stride across the street and set her down on her door step. She stares up at me, searching my face. She lifts a hand, cups my face and I lean into her palm. I kiss the soft skin of her inner wrist, deeply inhaling her scent. Fighting the need to grasp her by the nape of her neck and kiss the shit out of that perfect mouth of hers.
“Good night, Nor,” I sign.
“Night, Cole,” she says.
Then she drops her hand and steps back. She opens her door, steps inside the house and closes the door without a backward glance.
IT’S FRIDAY EVENING AND MEGS and I were supposed to hang out tonight, but she was called in to work because one of her colleagues fell ill. We haven’t spent a lot of time together since Josh’s death. Everything seems to be happening too fast, plus her crazy shifts at work don’t make things easier.
Cora and Joce are playing upstairs. They spent most of the afternoon on the terrace, helping Cole finish building the play house. Then he ordered me to sit on the couch and put my feet up. He made dinner for us, which consisted of burgers and fries. He left afterwards to visit with his parents.
I have been putting off packing up Josh’s clothes for a while now because I feel like if I do that, I’m getting rid of him, pushing him out of my life. But at the same time, I can’t postpone it any longer. After grabbing some boxes from the basement, I drag my feet up the stairs and inside my room. I open the door on Josh’s side of the closet and stand there for a few moments, twirling the ring on my finger around.
You will always be here with us. Always in my heart and thoughts, Josh.
One hour later, I finish taping up the last box containing Josh’s things. I glance at the top of the dresser where I put a few things I wanted to keep to remember him by and my chest hurts just taking in the last of what belonged to him. I’ve been holding back tears for the past two hours. Finally, I let go and crumple on the floor. I’m crying for my best friend and the man who had become a very big part of my life. Our lives. Our relationship had begun as a way to save us, but ended up being the best of friendships with no strings attached.
Taking in deep breaths, I carry them down to the basement one by one until everything is gone. I haven’t decided what I will do with them, but I want to check with Cole and his parents if they would like to keep a few things.
Speaking of Cole. . .I have been thinking about telling the girls that he is their father. I have no idea when would be the right time to do this and I have no idea how they will react. They adore Cole, but watching his face fall every time they call him, ‘Uncle Cole’ is tearing me apart. His name is on their birth certificates, which was the first thing I told the doctor to do once my daughters were born.
I pull my phone from the pocket of my jean shorts and open a new text.
Me: I’m planning on telling the girls tonight.
My phone buzzes immediately. Oh, that was fast.
Cole: Telling them what?
Me: About you. It’s high time they knew.
His reply doesn’t flash on my screen immediately. Minutes later, when I don’t hear from him, I inhale deeply, my fingers poised on the screen.
Me: I know this is awkward and not easy. I’ll understand if you think we should wait—
The screen flashes with a text, momentarily blocking the one I was typing.
Cole: I’m outside. Open the door.
What? I spin around, rush to the door and swing it open.