“I’m not wearing makeup,” Mary said. “The texture of foundation disgusts me.”
“Dad, what do you think?” Jane asked. “You’ve been quiet.”
Before Mr. Bennet could reply, Mrs. Bennet said, “Why don’t they come here and film at Knox Church? Knox does an elegant service.”
“I think it’s easier for them to shoot in California,” Jane said. “Dad?”
“You’re forty years old, Jane. If you want to make a spectacle of yourself, I can hardly stop you.”
“Fred, Chip is a Harvard-educated doctor whose family started Bingley Manufacturing,” Mrs. Bennet said. “He’s very distinguished.”
“Is that really what you think, Dad?” Jane sounded distraught.
“Jane, let them get used to the idea,” Liz said. “You can’t expect them all to be jumping for joy right away.”
“You do realize we can hear you, right?” Mary said.
“Tell them the last thing,” Liz said to Jane, and Mr. Bennet said, “To top what’s come so far, it had better have to do with alien abduction or bestiality.”
“You’ll each get paid about thirty thousand dollars,” Jane said. “Sorry, Ham, not you. But the rest of you.”
“Ha,” Kitty said. “Do you still not like the texture of foundation, Mary?”
“In that case,” Mr. Bennet said, “this sounds like an excellent opportunity for our entire family.”
TWELVE DAYS LATER, on the plane to Phoenix, where they’d board a second plane for Palm Springs—for both flights Liz was disappointed but unsurprised to find they were flying coach—Jane said, “In all the hubbub, I haven’t even formally asked, but I’ve been assuming you’ll be my maid of honor. Will you?”
“Of course,” Liz said.
“Just so you know, Darcy will be Chip’s best man. You’re okay with that, right? You and Darcy seemed very civil at the restaurant.”
That Darcy would attend the wedding was a likelihood to which Liz had reconciled herself; after all, as Chip’s friend and Caroline’s beau, he was doubly connected to the Bingleys. She had considered the possibility that what she presumed was his disdain for reality television, combined with his inflexible schedule, would result in his absence, but she’d recognized that such a conclusion was probably wishful thinking. However, that he would be the best man was not an eventuality she’d entertained.
“Chip feels indebted to Darcy,” Jane continued. “We wouldn’t be getting married if not for him making that dinner happen.”
“Or maybe if not for him you wouldn’t have broken up in the first place,” Liz said.
“But I still would have been pregnant.” A look of worry crossed Jane’s pretty features. “Lizzy, the media stuff will blow over quickly, don’t you think? When people appear in tabloids all the time, aren’t they in cahoots with the reporters?”
“Kind of,” Liz said. “But with the baby born by the time your wedding airs, I’m sure there’ll be a bounty for pictures of the Eligible offspring.”
Jane shuddered.
“Does Chip expect that Caroline will be your manager now, too?” Liz asked. “Do they want you to shill for, like, a diaper company?”
Jane shook her head. “He told me the night he proposed that I’m the only person he’s met since he appeared on TV who loves him for him and isn’t trying to ride his coattails. He knows I have no desire for fame. He wouldn’t say it, but, Lizzy, I think he even wonders if Caroline is using him a little.”
“A little?” Liz repeated. “He wonders?”
“The house we’ll live in after the wedding is in a gated community in Burbank,” Jane said. “I hope it’s not weird being so isolated. I’m actually excited about L.A., but I’ll be happy when everything with Eligible is finished.”
“I know you will,” Liz said, though what she thought was Everything with Eligible hasn’t even started.