Easy Nights (Boudreaux #6)

But I’ll be damned if I can stop it.

“Eli’s on his way,” she continues, her voice soothing and heavy with her accent. “He had to wrap up a meeting and then was going to come here. We called everyone else, and they’re waiting for an update. They can be here in a little bit if we need them.”

I nod.

“You’re awfully quiet,” she says and links her fingers with mine, and that’s all I can take.

I want to hold her. I want to hug her and not let go. I want to kiss those sweet, plump lips and run my hands all over her little body.

And I want to lie in bed and talk all through the night about nothing at all.

And that’s something I’ve never wanted to do with another woman in my life.

“Shit,” I whisper and pull my hand away from her, then deliberately put her hand in her own lap. “I don’t think I can do this.”

“Do what?” She’s frowning.

“You know—”

Shit, I don’t know how to say this. I take a deep breath and press my fingertips into my eyes, trying to find a way to say this without spilling my guts.

But then it occurs to me that pussy footing around the truth hasn’t gotten us anywhere so far, so why not be brutally honest?

“Here’s the thing, Van. I can’t do this. I can’t spend the rest of my life in the friend zone with you.”

I stand, putting some space between us and stare down at her. It feels hot in here.

“I love your family, and I owe them a lot. Your brothers are my brothers. Gabby and Charly are my sisters, or as close as possible without actually sharing DNA.

“But I don’t have those same feelings about you, Van. I don’t feel brotherly at all with you.”

She won’t look at me. Her hands are folded tightly in her lap, and her head is down.

Fuck me, I’m screwing this up.

“Look at me.” She complies, and her eyes are sad, which is a hard punch to the gut. “I know it feels like this is out of the blue. I just can’t sit here and lean on you as a friend, when that’s not what I want at all. I’ve had the hots for you since we were kids. But you were way too young for me to try to pursue you, and then our lives just went in two different directions.

“When we were both adults, you got married.” I clear my throat, not willing to tell her how much that destroyed me. How hearing those words from Eli brought me to my knees, and the thought of another man having his hands on her made me want to punch the fuck out of someone.

“I know I can’t have you, for a million different reasons, and I came to terms with that years ago. But I also can’t sit here and pretend that we’re just friends.”

She doesn’t say a word, and she’s lowered her gaze again, still not willing to look at me.

Finally, she nods once, stands, and walks away without even a glance back. No goodbye. No punching me for being a dick.

Nothing.

What the fuck did I just do?

Not even five minutes later, Eli shows up just as Beau returns with the hot drinks.

“Why did Van just take my car keys and tell me to catch a ride back with Beau?” Eli asks, complete confusion covering his face.

“I just fucked everything up.”

Beau frowns and hands me the coffee, then passes Van’s tea to Eli.

“Oh no, I get the coffee.” Eli reaches for Beau’s coffee and hands him the tea.

“What did you say?” Beau asks.

“And how do we unfuck it?” Eli adds.

“You’re going to want to punch me.”

“That’s nothing new,” Beau says, his voice as steady as ever. “Spill it.”





Chapter Four


Savannah

What in the hell just happened?

I’m driving to Kate and Eli’s place. I can’t go back to work like this, especially since Kate is still on maternity leave. And I need to talk to her.

Kate’s been one of my best friends since she, Declan, and I shared an apartment at college.

I can’t believe what Ben just said. He rendered me speechless, and embarrassed.

And not a little bit sad.

I feel tears gather, and I wipe them away furiously.

I am not going to cry over the likes of Ben! I’m going to cling on to the anger like a lifeline.

I pull into Eli’s driveway and cut the engine, then march up his porch and knock twice before I let myself in.

“Kate?”

“Shh,” she says, hurrying out from the kitchen. “I finally got Coraline down.”

“Sorry,” I whisper. “Is there a safe place for me to rant?”

“Backyard,” she says with a nod. She grabs two bottles of cola and the baby monitor and leads me out the back door to the beautiful patio. “Okay. She can’t hear us out here.”

“I hope I didn’t wake her.”

She glances down at the monitor and turns it up. “Nope, she’s sleeping.”

“You have mom super powers,” I mutter, making her grin.

“Cool, huh?”

“Pretty cool.” I shrug and pace to the edge of the patio, staring at professionally groomed grass and flower gardens.

“What’s up?” Kate asks as she settles in a chair.

“Ben,” I reply and turn to look at her. “I just left the hospital.”

“How’s his mom?”

“She was still in surgery when I left.”

She narrows her eyes, watching me closely. “He hurt you.”

“He pissed me off,” I correct her. “I was being supportive. Beau went to get coffee and I stayed with Ben, comforting him, and suddenly, he goes all psycho on me.”

“Wait,” she says, holding up a hand. “We’re talking about Ben?”

“Yes. Ben.” I march away from her and then back again. “I was just holding his hand, telling him that she is going to be okay, because that’s what friends do. That’s what family does.”

Kate nods, so I keep going.

“And then, he suddenly pushes me away and tells me he can’t be my friend.”

“Wait. What?”

“Exactly!” I point at her. “What the fuck?”

“What did he say? Exactly.”

“That he can’t pretend that we’re just friends anymore.”

Her face softens and she sits back in her chair again. “Go on.”

“He said he’s been attracted to me for years, and he accepts that he’s not right for me, but he also can’t sit by and just be in the friend zone.”

“Poor Ben,” Kate says and I scowl at her.

“Why are you on his side?”

“I’m not on any side.” She shakes her head and takes a sip of her cola. “But Van, this isn’t new news to any of us.”

“Well, it’s news to me,” I reply and finally lower myself into the chair next to hers. “I mean, that’s the thanks I get for being a good friend?”

“Okay, pull your head out of your ass,” Kate says.

I really want to punch her right now.

“Ben’s been in love with you for years, Van. We all know it. Hell, your brothers have been giving him the green light to date you for at least the last year.”

I stare at her, stunned. “I don’t think I understood you correctly.”

“You did.” She smiles now. Kate looks fantastic. Motherhood looks good on her.

“I can’t be with Ben.”

“Why not?”

“Jesus, there are a list of reasons, Kate.”

“I’m in no hurry. Let’s hear them.”

She crosses one leg over the other and waits.

“I shouldn’t have come here.”