Drop Dead Sexy

Once I was tied up, the Redneck Twins wrapped a gag around both of our mouths before leaving us alone. An eternity seemed to pass. It felt like hours, but it might’ve only been a few minutes. It was in those moments that my love life flashed before my eyes, and I relived my past.

I was jolted from my thoughts by the work shed door opening. A tall, lanky man stepped inside the room. He wore a white button-down shirt with no tie, and a pair of black dress pants. A pungent smelling cigar was in his mouth. On top of his head was the worst toupee I’d ever seen, and that was saying a lot since I’d worked on a lot of bald men in my funeral days.

I knew without a shadow of a doubt that it was Ronald Krump. Of course, my gaze couldn’t help zeroing in on his crotch. Even in what could have been my final moments, I couldn’t help wondering what a reconstructed penis looked like. Did it feel like a dildo or smooth like real skin? And where did the extra parts come from to rebuild it? I mean, it wasn’t like men were lining up to donate their penises. It certainly wasn’t on the checklist for organ donations. I wondered if he would grant me a last request by dropping his pants and showing it off.

“Well, well. I have to say you two are a surprise. I had my men come up here to detain the bitch who helped take away my manhood, and instead of her, we get you two.”

A relieved breath whooshed out of my nose. They hadn’t killed Olive. Thankfully, she hadn’t been home and was safe somewhere.

Krump crossed the room to stand in front of us. He jerked Catcher’s gag away. “Agent Mains, it’s so nice to finally meet the man who has been putting so much heat on my ass these last few months.”

“You’re The Shadow?” Catcher questioned incredulously. I was just as surprised as he was.

“Yes. I am.”

“But how the hell is that possible? The Shadow has a drug operation that’s been underway for over a year. You didn’t get out of prison until six months ago.”

“There’s a simple explanation for that. While I ran the operation from inside the big house, my two associates, that you just had the privilege of meeting, did all the leg work on the inside.”

“That’s why your appearance kept changing with people’s descriptions.”

Ronald grinned. “Pretty ingenious, isn’t it?”

“How did you even get started on the drug trade when you were inside?” Catcher inquired.

“When it looked like I would get paroled, I knew I needed to start working on building a new life when I got outside. Through a few contacts on the inside, I hooked up with Larry and Daryl, and the business was launched. Things were rolling along until my old enemy in the mafia, Delaney, got wind of what I was doing and decided to pull a snitch.” Ronald shook his head. “A little bit of cyanide took care of him.”

“What about Randy?” I questioned behind my gag.

Ronald left Catcher’s side to come stand before me. He cocked his brows before snatching away my gag. “And just what is it you wanted to know?” He ran his fingers across my face, causing me to shudder in revulsion. He licked his lips. “You sure are a pretty thing, aren’t you?”

“I asked about Randy.”

A sour look came over Ronald’s expression. “Oh yes, how could I forget about Randy Dickinson? The man who ruined my life.”

“It was your choice to take a non-FDA approved male-enhancement drug,” I countered.

Ronald’s nostrils flared in anger. “You shut your damn mouth!” he snarled. He raised his hand to hit me, but then he lowered it. He began pacing in front of me. “Do you have any idea what it is like to lose your penis? To have the one part of you that makes you a man violently taken away from you.”

When he paused for me to reply, I quickly said, “Um, no. I don’t.” I knew better than to argue that as a woman, I didn’t have a penis, so I just couldn’t relate to having my manhood taken. He was already so mentally unhinged I didn’t want to do anything else to set him off.

“I was just looking for a good time—something to make sex interesting again. When it came to fucking, I’d done just about everything there was out there. Except for doing a dude. I needed something to take me to the next level. Then I hear about this guy who made a drug that could make sex out of this world.”

He narrowed his eyes at me. “Randy was a pharmacist, for fuck’s sake. He worked with drugs every day. Why shouldn’t I have trusted him? How was I to know he was working with some backwoods hoodoo psycho to make some of his drugs?”

He exhaled a trail of foul-smelling smoke in my face. “He had to pay for what he did to me. It didn’t take me too long to find him. But I took my time about killing him—I had to get the logistics just right. Through my drug connections, I was able to bribe someone in the security company that handled Randy’s account to deactivate his security system. Fucker was fast asleep in dreamland. Of course, I made sure to wake him up, so I knew the last thing he saw was my face.”

“You sure aren’t worried about running your mouth off to us, are you?” Catcher asked.