Desire Me

“How are you?” Andi asked as she crossed over to the closet.

“I’ve been better,” Maggie answered honestly. “But I suppose I’ll live.”

“Good to hear, cuz we’ve got stuff to do today,” Andi said, emerging from the closet with an armful of clothes which she tossed onto the bed in front of Maggie. “Get dressed, I’ll be downstairs.”

Curiosity drove Maggie to follow Andi’s command. A short while later she was joining her friend downstairs.

“What exactly do we have to do today?” Maggie asked warily.

“We’re going to Savannah to do some apartment hunting. Plus we’ve got to go by the Mercer campus. Today is the last day for late registration.” Andi looked intently at Maggie, waiting for her response.

Maggie hesitated. She wasn’t sure what she wanted anymore. Did she still want to move to Savannah or was she going back to Boston? Over the last few days so much had happened, so much had changed that she hadn’t really had time to process it all, to consider her options and her next move. She looked over at Andi who was watching her expectantly and she just couldn’t bring herself to hurt her friend. She decided to humor Andi, reasoning with herself that it would be good to get out of the house at least.

“Just let me grab my purse,” she said, and Andi smiled.

~∞~

Maggie spent the long drive to Savannah trying to figure out what she was going to do. She asked herself if Aaron had been the only reason that she wanted to stay in Georgia. She vaguely remembered contemplating the move before they had become serious, but for the last month she’d been imagining their life together in Savannah and now it seemed almost impossible to imagine her life there without him.

Andi allowed Maggie the time to think. She didn’t push her to talk but she also wouldn’t allow her to wallow for too long. Anytime Maggie would start to get lost in her own misery Andi would suddenly pipe up with some cheerful bit of conversation to distract her. Maggie was grateful for her friend’s presence. She needed her energy right now to keep from getting swallowed up with despair.

It didn’t take long for Maggie to realize that Andi had put a lot of thought and effort into this outing. She had six appointments scheduled to view apartments all over Savannah. At first Maggie was just going through the motions with her, commenting on the size of the kitchen or the view from a window. But by the third apartment Maggie actually found herself picturing her life in Savannah with Andi. She started paying attention to things like the Chinese place on the corner that would probably have good take-out and asking questions like whether or not they allowed cats.

By the time the girls had stopped for lunch Maggie was actually smiling occasionally without having to think about it. She was beginning to feel like herself again and that’s when she realized that the self she felt like was who she’d become when she’d moved to Georgia and it was still who she wanted to be. Aaron had been a big part of that, but he wasn’t the only part. He wasn’t the only reason to stay.

Maggie tried to ignore the small part of her brain that reminded her that Aaron would probably be in Savannah as well. She wasn’t really sure if that was a reason to stay or a reason to go. So for now she tried not to think of it.

After lunch they went by the Mercer campus and Maggie applied for acceptance in the medical school. It wasn’t until she was filling out the paperwork to have her records transferred that the reality sank in. Medical school was still an option for her. It was that final realization that her dream of becoming a doctor was still a reality which helped her to see that her life was not over.

What she’d had with Aaron had irrevocably changed her, and losing him had nearly destroyed her. But she had survived and she would go on. She would probably never stop loving him, never stop missing him. But her life would go on and maybe someday she could be happy again. Not the kind of happy that she’d had lying in his arms in the barn loft, but some semblance of happy at least.

“Thank you for getting me out of the house,” Maggie said as they drove back down Devereaux Lane. It had been a long day and Maggie was grateful for the exhaustion. It meant sleep would come easily.

“I’m glad you came along,” Andi said.

“Me too,” Maggie replied honestly.

“You’re going to be okay,” Andi said softly.

Maggie sighed heavily. “I know.”

As they approached the driveway Maggie noticed a black car driving down the road ahead of them. For a moment it appeared to have been stopped on the road in front of the house, but now it was disappearing into the distance. Something about the car stuck in Maggie’s mind, but she couldn’t place it. She couldn’t figure out why it made her feel so uneasy.

“Did you see that car?” Maggie asked as they turned into the driveway.

“What car?” Andi slowed down and looked around.

“Never mind.” Maggie shook it off. “It was probably nothing.”





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Elle Boon, C.C. Cartwright, Catherine Coles, Mia Epsilon, Samantha Holt, J.W. Hunter, Allyson Lindt, Kathryn Kelly, Tracey Smith's books