“I came home every day after that, straight from school. I’d always find her in the front yard waiting for me. She pretended she was just playing outside, but I could see the relief on her face every time I came home. She was like my shadow, sticking by my side everywhere I went, sleeping in my room every night.
“As the week wore on I saw her become a bit more relaxed, a little less jumpy than she had been before. But Bill was becoming increasingly agitated. He didn’t like me being around.” Aaron grew silent for a few minutes and Maggie wasn’t sure if he was going to continue. She stood from the couch and stepped up beside him at the window. She placed her hand tenderly on his arm.
“Bill picked a fight with me,” Aaron continued in the same monotone that he’d started with. “He accused me of doing disgusting things with my little sister. Asked me why she was sleeping in my room every night. He kept pushing and pushing until I lost my temper. I hit him. I realize now that’s what he wanted. He used that as an excuse to kick me out of the house. I saw the terror in Katelyn’s eyes the moment he told me to go, and my suspicions were confirmed.
“My mother took his side, believed the lies he told. She told me to leave and never come back. Katelyn was crying, begging me not to go. But what choice did I have?” He looked at Maggie desperately as if she might hold the answer to that question, one that had obviously been haunting him for years. She had none, so she remained silent.
“I left like they wanted. But I didn’t go far. I couldn’t leave her. I stayed in the woods behind the house and watched. When the lights went out I snuck back into the house through a broken kitchen window.
“My father’s shotgun was still in the display case in the den. He’d taught me how to fire it when I was younger. I took the gun with me to Katelyn’s room. My plan was to take her with me. We were going to run away. I’m not sure how I thought a fourteen year old and ten year old were supposed to survive on our own, but I knew I couldn’t leave her there. I only grabbed the gun because it made me feel braver. I hadn’t planned to use it.” Aaron’s fists balled at his sides. His whole body radiated with tension. Maggie’s chest tightened as tears came into her eyes and she waited for the inevitable conclusion to this tragic tale.
“He came to her room before we could leave. He wasn’t expecting to find me there, but one look into his crazed eyes told me exactly what he was expecting when he came to my little sister’s room. She ran and hid in the closet the moment she saw him. He tried to follow after her but I stopped him. I put the gun to his chest and told him not to take another step. I told him that I was taking my little sister, that we were going to leave and that he was going to let us or else I was going to kill him. I thought he would back down. For just a minute I actually thought he’d let us go.” Aaron closed his eyes against the memory and took a deep breath before continuing.
“He looked me in the eye and told me to pull the trigger, told me if I didn’t kill him that he would kill me, but first he would make me watch as he…” Aaron trailed off as tears choked his words and he shook his head against the images. He turned to face Maggie. His eyes were pleading.
“I pulled the trigger.” His tone betrayed no emotion, but his eyes begged her to understand. She did.
“I would have too,” she answered, looking up into his sad eyes and hoping that he could see the understanding in her own. “Aaron, you were put into an impossible situation. You were just a child. No one can blame you for…”
“Everyone blamed me!” he interjected angrily. Maggie saw a hardness come over his features that she’d never seen before. He took a step away from her, putting distance between them again.
“My own mother testified against me. Testified in court that she’d suspected me of molesting my own sister! Said that he was protecting her! That I was still angry from the fight we’d had, that I’d come back to settle the score. They called it pre-meditated. They called me a murderer and they found me guilty.” His rant lost steam about halfway through. His shoulders slumped in defeat.
“What about Katelyn?” Maggie asked. “Didn’t they ask her what happened?”
“I don’t know.” He shook his head sadly. “I never saw her again.” The first tears finally broke free and slipped down his cheek.
“Never?” Maggie asked. Aaron shook his head as silent tears ran down his face.
“I was sent to a juvenile detention center until my twenty-first birthday. The last time I saw my mother was in that courtroom. The last time I saw my sister was that night, as the police were taking me away.”
She imagined what it must have been like for him to have been so young and to be locked away, alone and forgotten.