Zach grabbed it and started to tear it in half.
The gesture dug deep, gnawing at raw wounds. She smiled and shook her head. “That won't change anything.”
“You can't. We can't do it without you.”
“Yeah, you can.” She ignored the ache throbbing behind her ribcage. “You just can't do it without each other. Besides, I'm leaving.”
“Just like that?”
“Not just like that. I accepted the offer I had before…” She couldn't finish the thought. Before what? Before they kept such a big secret from someone so important? Before she surrendered her heart even though she knew better? “Something came in that lets me get paid and keeps you all in business as well.”
“Where are you going?”
“Washington. The offer isn’t as good as something like CFO, but it’s enough to make it worth my time.” Her resignation and leaving meant something else, too. She hadn't officially broken it off with him, but the entire conversation implied it.
“What about us?” The emotion vanished from his voice, and the question was flat.
She knew the answer. She just had to tell him. It was the thought that haunted her more than any other. She’d left him once to keep his plans for the future from impacting her career, and she’d been mistaken. Things weren’t so cloudy this time though. Lust wasn’t a good excuse for breaking up the potential their business held… All she had to do was say so, but the words wouldn’t form. “What do you think?”
He lifted her chin, forcing her to look him in the eye. “You have to say it.”
“There's no us.”
“So you're going to do it again.” He dropped his hand, disdain echoing in his statement.
She deserved the irritation directed at her. “Not quite. No spending years blaming you for something that’s not your fault.” She forced out the last two words. “No regrets.”
She stepped back. She needed to leave soon because her composure wouldn't hold much longer. “The two of you need each other. Not in the you’re-an-adorable-couple kind of way your developers joke about, but you work too well together. I can't be what comes between you. And honestly, I can't take being the verbal punching bag for your testosterone-fueled arguments anymore. Goodbye. Good luck.”
Zach stepped up next to her and cupped the back of her neck with one hand.
A moan pulsed in her raw throat, and she swallowed it. Her expression never shifted.
He kissed her softly.
Desire screamed through her, and she beat it back. It took the last of her self-control not to return the gesture. She kept her mouth still and eyes open, staring at him blankly until he pulled away.
He frowned.
She turned away before the tears started leaking from her eyes and walked out the front door.
“Rae.” Zach’s voice froze her feet to the ground.
She couldn’t turn around. Facing him again would hurt too much, and her grip on her composure was almost gone. “What?”
“You’re really doing this.”
She tried to keep her response steady. “I have to.”
“You don’t.” The two words were heavy. “Scott will get over whatever his issue is. If you really think it’s best, you don’t have to work for us. Don’t go.”
Why couldn’t he just let her leave? Her resolve weakened every moment she stood there. She blinked back the tears, and faced him. “It’s not just about Scott. Or who is or isn’t working with you.” Each word was more painful than the last.
His blue eyes were clouded with hurt. “Then explain it to me.”
She threw up her hands, as frustrated with her lack of words as with his persistence. “It’s everything. I’m already a part of it, and if I stay, that won’t change. I’ll get sucked in again, because that’s what happens.”
She was unable to stop the words flowing from her. “And then we’ll break up. It’ll suck. It’ll devour at least one of us. Worse than it is now. And even though stuff like that happens all the time, it usually doesn’t involve multimillion dollar companies. You don’t want another Kelly, and even though I don’t plan on screwing anyone over, we’re already proving none of us is mature enough to keep our personal lives and work separate.”
His brow knit together. “What makes you so sure you and I are doomed?”
“Really?” She couldn’t keep the disbelief from her voice. “We couldn’t even tell people we were dating. You still keep yourself closed off. We can be baring our souls, and you’ll just randomly hold something back. That doesn’t bode well for our future together.”
He stared back, lips drawn in a tight line, not moving or speaking. The seconds ticked away.
Did he expect her to say something? She’d pretty much spewed it all. She wasn’t going to babble just to fill the air.