Heat envelops me when my toes brush his legs and feel the crisp hair on them. An ache balloons in my chest. I’ve missed this so much. The company of another person—not just a man. My aunt tried her best when she became my guardian after the death of my parents but it was never quite the same. Once she married Dan, that was it. Things would never be the same again. I suppress a shudder. If I hadn’t run away at seventeen I don’t know what he would have done to me. My aunt left him once I got up the guts to phone her and tell him what he’d done. Presumably he’d admitted to it. She wrote to me while I was still living outside of London. Dan ruined both our lives, I suspect.
I lie and listen to Hunter’s heavy breathing for a while. Strange how that sound can be comforting. I wish I understood him. Or at least my fascination with him. I’ve never met a man so complex. The way he flashes from wry smiles to gut-wrenching intense expressions. He’s intelligent, that much is clear, and brutally honest. Now that appeals to me. Which is ironic considering my whole life is a lie. But I’ve been toyed with so much in the past. A man who means what he says is refreshing.
That must be it. I haven’t met anyone like him before and that’s why he intrigues me. Unfortunately that doesn’t explain when I feel like I’m being struck by a thousand bolts of lightning every time we come into contact. I yawn and curl up, carefully avoiding Hunter. I don’t want to be experiencing any more lightning tonight, thank you very much.
***
He comes to me that night. Touches me. Whispers to me. Bile rises in my throat as I wait in the darkness in the narrow single bed, my aunt’s faint snores seeping in through the open door from the other room. I lie still and hope he thinks I’m asleep. It’s worse if I talk back. One day, he promises, he will teach me what it’s like to be with a real man.
Then we’re on set, bright lights shining down on me. My stepfather has gone and it’s one of the well hung porn stars. He’s not good looking, even has a paunch, but as long as he’s got length and girth, no one cares. As long as I look good, that’s all that matters.
I’m on a bed. A stranger presses lubrication into me. I must have taken some strong painkillers because everything is quite fuzzy. I’m still sore though. Before I can change my mind, my co-star is on me. I squirm and fight him off but it’s no good. He’s stronger than me. All the cameramen urge him on until his face melts. It’s Pete. He’s laughing at me. Mocking me. The cameramen are gone and it’s my friends. We’re in a bar and they jeer and shout. I’m a whore, they say. A filthy slut. No one wants me. No one ever will.
Tears cloud my vision and I curl up, trying to shield my naked body from them.
***
Hunter
A strange sound drags me out of a deep sleep. It takes me a few moments of staring at the unfamiliar ceiling for me to figure out where I am. I twist quickly and regret it as pain spears up my side. Glancing down, I see the gauze and a generous amount of bruising. Memories of Jess’s fingers on my chest, of her intrepid gaze raking me assail me and I’ve got a damned hard-on.
Then I realize Jess is next to me. The bedding is twisted around her legs and she’s in a cute little tee and polka dot panties. My erection grows. Smooth endless legs and the cutest ass I’ve seen in… well… forever, face me. Her hair is a wild tangle on the pillow. I can’t see her face but I want to. She mumbles something. Is she dreaming of me? ‘Cause God knows, I’ve dreamt of her enough times recently.
I stretch and consider her for a while. I especially consider her ass. Goddamn, it looks so good. Even those tight trousers she favours did her no justice. I’m surprised she opted to share the bed with me, not that I meant to fall asleep. But still, I won’t pass up an opportunity. I’ve got another chance to persuade her to spend some time with me now. She’s a hard nut to crack. Surely she feels the attraction practically burning between us? So why won’t she give in?
Well, probably because she’s smarter than that. She’s keeping herself buttoned down. If I could just find a way in.
Great, now all I can think of is the way in I’d really like to take. My fingers twitch with the urge to reach for the waistband of those silly cotton things and peel them down. I’d curl my hand around that lush rear and pull her onto me. Maybe I’d take her hard and fast or slow so I could see her expression as I take her to the edge.
Another mumble from her has me cursing myself. I need to gain control of my body—and my thoughts. Her waking to find me with an erection isn’t going to help my case at all.
I draw in several long slow breaths and try to picture something unappealing. But nothing is coming and my gaze keeps sneaking back to those fucking polka dots. I will never see spots in the same way again.
I perk at the realization I’m in her apartment and she’s sleeping. The letter. I need to get a look at it. My gut tells me it’s something important. A key to unlocking the mystery that is Jess and her schemes.