“And that’s one of the reasons why I’ve come. To support you both in your venture, obviously. Mostly, though, to give you this.” Esther wrapped her arms around Frankie and held on tight. “There are times when words are simply not enough.”
Frankie’s eyes prickled. “I don’t know that I really did anything. But you’re very welcome.”
“You’re a wonderful person, Frankie Hamilton. Lucas couldn’t stop telling me about all the brave things you did on Astoria.”
“I can’t believe we’re talking about the same man. Forgive me, Mrs Davenport, but the Lucas I know is a man of few words.”
“I’ve got my old Lucas back.” Esther smiled even as a film of moisture coated her eyes.
“I hear my name.” Lucas rounded a corner and kissed his mother’s cheek. “You ladies got nothing better to talk about than me?”
His gaze fell onto Frankie. As usual, the very sight of him made her stomach clench. Her mouth went dry and she found it hard to swallow. She knew she’d missed him, but until that moment, she hadn’t realised how much.
“It’s nice to see you again, Lucas. Though I wasn’t expecting you today.”
“I’ve been here a couple of hours. I wanted to make sure everything was right before you got here.”
“You did?” Frankie felt as though she were being sucked into mud and every time she got her head out, something else pulled her under.
“You did an amazing thing for me.” Lucas smiled. Not one of the impersonal ones he’d used while they were sorting out details for the charity, but one the intimate ones he’d used when they were alone on Astoria. “I wanted to do something in return.”
She held back the retort that jumped to mind.
He could’ve sent flowers.
Because him being here, so near, was incredibly difficult. The auction would hopefully sell off what remained of her life with Joey. And it would be a line drawn. The end of that life.
She wished it would be as easy to wipe out the memories she had with Lucas. Ten years she’d spent with Joey and it had been over the moment she caught him cheating. Ten days with Lucas and it had been so hard to imagine a life without him.
“Thank you.” Her voice was stilted, but she found it impossible to inject any emotion, not when the ones swirling around inside her were as confused and jumbled as a thousand-piece jigsaw puzzle. “I appreciate the gesture.”
“I’m going to leave you two together.” Esther’s face reflected the worry in her words. “Point me in the right direction, Lucas, and I’ll organise everything while you chat.”
Frankie looked around, desperate for something to happen to give her an escape. The last thing she wanted to do that day was rehash old, raw emotions with Lucas.
She’d had every possession she wanted while living with Joey. But now, the one thing she wanted—Lucas’s love—couldn’t be bought with all the money in the world.
“I heard from Charles and Hettie.”
“You did?” Frankie’s legs shook. She walked around the desk and sank into the chair. “How is baby Edward?”
“They said he’d doing very well.” Lucas paused, his eyes sweeping over her before he continued: “Especially now Victoria’s back.”
“That’s wonderful!”
“I wasn’t sure whether you’d be upset at that news.”
“That a mother has been reunited with her child?” Did he really not understand her at all? “How could you think I wouldn’t be happy for them?”
“You were so close to him, I thought…”
“No you didn’t, Lucas,” Frankie spat. “That requires a depth of feeling you don’t have.”
“That’s not fair.”
“You’re right,” she amended. “It’s a depth of feeling you don’t allow yourself to have.”
He looked like a chastened schoolboy, but Frankie refused to allow her heart to relent. Loving and not being loved in return was too painful.
“I’ve been making changes,” he said, rubbing his palms down his trousers.
“Have you? In what way?” She wasn’t sure it mattered.
“I can’t actually tell you.” He looked sheepish—a new look for Lucas.
“Right.” Frankie didn’t think she could be more disappointed. “I think I’ll go help your mother with the clothes.”
“I already did that.” His eyes were sad.
She refused to cave. “Do you know which shoes go with which outfit? Which bag and other accessories go together?”
“No, I just put all the same colours together.”
“That won’t work.” She got to her feet, barely resisting the urge to shake him. “Goodbye, Lucas.”
Thankfully, he didn’t follow her, though she refused to allow herself to crumble. He’d changed, had he? She couldn’t see any evidence of that. He was the same old Lucas. He thought he had all the answers, believed he could control every situation and eventuality, yet couldn’t even put the ways he’d changed into words.
That showed her nothing had altered; he hadn’t changed, he was just using different words. And they meant nothing to her. Not anymore.
It was way too late for words.
Chapter Twelve