It was an image I had of my dad and his buddies and my best friends growing up, all great memories.
The streets of this city were a training ground. We weren't thinking we would ever make it to the NHL. We dreamed of it, yeah, but we never thought it would really happen. Now when I drove down my childhood street, I was reminded of what it meant to me that I had the opportunity to become what I had.
Only now, it meant a little more because I had a lot to be thankful for. Take Andrew for example. He had the same upbringing as me, experienced the same single-minded athlete mentality, but just as he was about to see that dream come true, he was killed.
I didn't know him, but hearing the sadness in Ami's voice when she spoke about him and her family, and being back in Pittsburgh, made it feel real.
When I walked inside my parents' home, Ami was sitting on the couch with Granny B, listening intently to one of her stories. I smiled at Ami dressed in that Blackhawks hoodie I got her. She looked good, healthier. Her blonde wavy hair was longer already, now peeking past her ears and styled with a little gel giving it a crazy appearance that suited her well.
"Where do cousins come from Mase?" Granny B asked when I sat down next to them, bumping Ami's knee with my own as a hello.
I shrugged, giving my Ami a look before turning back to Granny B.
"Aunt holes," she cackled.
Ami lost it in a fit of snorting giggles. I leaned down, my lips at her ear, brushing against the soft skin, and she trembled. "Don't encourage her. She's like a child. If you laugh at her jokes, she'll keep spinning them all fucking day." Granny B was a fucking case. She lived in our basement because couldn't live alone, and she'd been kicked out of every other nursing home in Pittsburgh. She did crazy shit like duck taping her door shut, inappropriate as all get out, and wrote down everything. She had journals of all kinds of shit, most of which wasn't true.
We didn't have time to stay if we were heading back to Chicago tonight so I stood. "You ready to go?"
Ami stood as well and leaned into me. Her pretty smile was contagious as she hugged me. She snuggled into me, lingering a few seconds longer than necessary. I let myself selfishly melt into her, my body hunched around her.
Over the past few days, I had gotten so comfortable with her on the phone I wasn't sure how she would react once I saw her again.
Apparently, I had nothing to worry about.
"Yes, definitely ready to see some live hockey."
Once we said good-bye to my parents and crazy grandmother, we were just about outside of Pittsburgh when Ami turned to me in the car.
"I can't live with your parents, Evan. I'm not their daughter, and while I appreciate the gesture, I can't do it."
"Okay…" I knew she wouldn't stay with them long, and the idea of her living with me was terrifying, but I also didn't want her anywhere but with me or my family. It went back to protection. I'd become attached to this girl and couldn't stand the thought of her alone.
"Stay with me for a while," I suggested. I had just asked her to move in with me. The decision and the question stunned me, even as I asked it. It was completely unlike me.
"What?" Ami looked at me, clearly shocked by my request.
"Stay with me. In Chicago. I need a roommate."
"No, you don't."
"Yes, I do. My cat hates me. I get lonely."
"Highly doubtful."
We were silent, a touch of awkwardness settling over us when she spoke again. This time she looked over at me. "I'm not your charity case. I don't want to hurt you, but I hope that's not what this is, some pro athlete trying to help the poor girl he found or something like that. I'm just a girl that lost her family and got caught at the wrong place at the wrong time. Maybe…I'm not a good thing for you right now."
"Why don't you let me decide what's good for me?" My answer was sharp. I didn't want her thinking that was what this was, but to be fair, from the outside, to those doctors, to Ami, it didn't look that great. Here I was completely taken by this girl, basically stalking her, and for what?
She sighed, taking a deep breath and looked out the window at the passing cars.
"Just think about it." I reached across the console for her hand, wanting to touch her in some way. She let me, a slight tug to her lips informed me I was wearing her down. "I'm not home much, the building is secure, and you wouldn't have to worry."
"I need to get a job, Evan, and figure out what the hell I'm doing with my life."
"Well do that living with me for a little while."
I was well aware of what this situation was, and though I knew my intentions weren't harmful to Ami, I had to keep in mind that she didn't really know me. But she also didn't know my parents either. Fuck. I was all over the place.
"So?" I asked, pushing when she didn't say anything after about an hour.
"So?" she returned, not sure what I was searching for.
"Stay with me?"
"What do you think?" Ami gave me a slightly annoyed, slightly amused side-eyed glance.