I would lay there in bed, think of her, get mad that I was thinking of her in ways I shouldn't, and then have to get up and work out just to focus on something else. A few things happened. I got in better shape, sure, but I also never slept. That right there wasn't good for me considering the focus I needed on the ice.
The worst part was I knew I shouldn't have helped her take that bath at the hospital the other night, and now I had all these naked images of her in my brain. The perverted part wanted to see more. A lot more. My first mistake and lack of judgment, that I blamed on the sleep deprived state I was in, was what I did after the game with the Stars.
Maybe it was the rush of adrenaline, but I always found myself amped after a game and well...horny. Not sure why, but it'd always been that way for me ever since my junior hockey days when hormones started.
When I got to the hospital that night and Ami was moving around with a bright smile and those starry eyes, I reacted when she hugged me. I kissed her.
It was our first kiss and that was how I did it. Pathetic. I was a charmer that night for sure. Bullshit. I was fucking lucky she didn't lay my ass out.
But…she surprised me when she smiled again, resting her forehead against mine, her eyes fluttering closed the instant my mouth found hers again.
This kiss wasn't as rushed, and I was able to feel her soft skin and mouth melting with mine, consuming me. Slowly, we let the kiss develop, never rushed as it deepened. I didn't push or use my hands; I just increased the pressure letting her know I wanted it.
My tongue traced along her bottom lip, asking, and she gladly let me. I'd like to say I remembered the kiss, but I was more caught up in the fact that I was kissing her than how it felt.
Eventually I pulled back, wondering if she was going to slap the shit out of me, but then she smiled instead of knocking me out. That was cool. I could work with that.
"That's an interesting way of saying hello." Her smile, God, that fucking smile, made me want to kiss her again.
"Sorry," I said, taking a seat next to the bed, afraid I actually would kiss her.
"It's okay." She seemed to fidget for a moment and then took to her bed again. "I didn't say it was bad. It was cool, just interesting."
Game 60 – Atlanta Thrashers
Saturday, February 13, 2010
(Home Game)
Times like this were my favorite to practice. I didn't mind the practices when fans watched, but empty ice was my favorite. It cleared my head.
I'd set the music to whatever I wanted, mostly Filter on mornings like this, but it varied.
The boys weren't here yet, so it left me some time to just skate and play the puck. I wasn't forced into drills and repetition of different shots. I could just skate and clear my head.
That was when Ami would come into mind.
If I closed my eyes, I could see her and picture that kiss and those pretty fucking starry eyes.
Fuck. Stop thinking about her.
I'd set an easy pace around the ice, building speed as I rounded the corner and then snagged a puck. I brought it to the end of my stick and balanced it there before juggling it and slapping it into the net like a baseball player would.
Then I thought of Ami again.
Damn it.
Thankfully, the guys made their way on the ice and our morning practice started.
Pushing pucks around, we slapped them at the net. Fans were there this morning watching. A young girl, maybe twelve, stood next to the glass trying to take a picture of Leo so I stuck my stick in the way.
She glared and then looked toward me, a leveling glare that gave way to a smile. Flushed cheeks appeared, so I smiled in return and hit the glass with my shoulder and skated away knowing that simple interaction made that girl's day.
"Jail bait," Remy chirped when I passed by and then made a siren sound.
"How are you and the ballerina doin'?" Dave asked, taking a shot at Leo with his stick when he came by.
"She's getting released soon," I said, circling a puck and then flipping it up onto my stick. "So I guess that's good."
"Does she remember?" he asked, watching Remy and Cage shove each other and then Leo getting in the middle of it.
"No. Nothing from that night."
"Glad she's getting better, man. We were all pulling for her." He gave me a wink and then Leo came back by, and Dave took off to send him flying into the boards.
Same shit, different day.
Dave had always been the guy on the team that made sure the guys were okay. If you were sick or running behind on the ice, he'd sit you down and ask what the problem was. He was always sort of the team psychologist. All of us felt comfortable going to him and talking about anything. Me included. After that night with Ami all the guys knew something was up with me. My attitude had changed on and off the ice.
That game against Atlanta was intense, mostly because Leo was getting into every other play with Atlanta's center.
That was when Joel gave a low hit on Leo and knocked him down hard into the boards.