It didn't matter how many times they told me that they'd be fine, I was going to worry about my friends, Brenon especially. He'd just recovered from the last encounter with iron dust. How would his body react if he was subjected to it again?
"You trust Goldie, right?" Evangeline said. "You trust Brenon?"
I nodded. "I even trust you, Evangeline."
She smiled. "We're going to be fine. Brenon and I will focus on the wolves, the others will get Goldie as close as she can get and when she's ready to open the vial, the rest of us will be long gone. It's what we should have done in the first place. We never needed the Sayges to get in the way."
I raised my eyebrows. "That's what worries me. We couldn't even pull this off with their help."
"It was too many people. Terra was on to us the whole time. This time, we surprise her," Brenon said.
The door opened, and Joe walked in. "Goldie asked me to find out when we'll be there. "
Brenon pulled out a pocket watch on a gold chain and glanced at the time. "We'll be there in two hours."
"Thanks." He looked over at me. "You doing okay, Ara?"
"I'm fine." It wasn't the truth, I wasn't feeling fine, but it was too hard to explain the anxious feeling that occupied most of my insides at the moment. I had to take this risk to save Ryder. I couldn't leave him with Terra, but in addition to being worried about Ryder and my safety, I was concerned about Brenon and all the other members of the Rose Circus.
Joe nodded, knowing I wasn't explaining how I was feeling to him. He knew me well enough to know that I wouldn't elaborate in a time like this. "Let me know if you need anything. I'm going to go see if Goldie needs any more help."
He turned and walked back toward the door.
"Wait, Joe." I jogged over to stop him from leaving. "What are you helping her with? You're not planning on going in there are you?"
"Ara, Goldie isn't the only human on the train." He went through the door before I could question him further.
"Wait," I called after him, but he stepped through the door into the next car.
I looked over at Brenon and Evangeline. "You don't think he's planning on helping Goldie?"
"He's taken quite a liking to her," Evangeline said. "I'd be surprised if he didn't go with her."
"I have to stop him from going." I pulled open the door.
"Don't," Brenon said.
Letting the door close, I turned to look at him. "Why? He could get himself killed."
Brenon walked over to me and took hold of my hand. "So could any of us. Let him make his choice."
My shoulders sank. Joe wasn't doing anything that I wasn't doing myself. It would hardly be fair to tell him he couldn't get involved when I was putting myself in danger. He was a grown man. He could make his own decisions, but it didn't mean I had to like it.
"Come on." Brenon tugged on my hand. "You should get some rest before we get there."
"What about you?" I asked as I let him lead me away from the dining car.
"I've been resting for three days, and I have a feeling you didn't do a whole lot of sleeping while you were watching over me."
We continued through the vibrating cars. I had to focus on my footing while we walked. The motions of the moving train made me feel unbalanced despite how stable everything was.
After crossing between several cars, we arrived at Brenon's private car. The last time I'd been in here had been right before the Fire Festival. So much had happened in that short time. The Fire Festival felt like it happened a million years ago.
He opened the door. "Go ahead. I'll come get you when we arrive."
I wasn't sure I'd be able to get any rest while my nerves twisted and churned inside me. "Are you sure there's nothing else I can help with before we arrive?"
Brenon smiled. "You've helped me more than anyone ever has." He paused, the smile fading. "I don't think I thanked you properly."
"You don't have to say anything," I said. "You'd have done the same for me."
Giving my hand a quick squeeze, he smiled. "You're right, I would."
Dropping my hand, Brenon turned and went back the way we had come, leaving me standing alone in his car.
I stretched out on the couch, resting my head on a pink pillow and wondered about Ryder. Was he safe? Had Terra injured him? Did he even know what was going on? Ryder wasn't aware of magic. He was just as clueless as I was until I joined the Circus.
I sat up with a jolt. Ryder wasn't blood, but Aunt Kay had said that our parents came from the Sayge community. Was it possible that Ryder had magic of his own? Would he be expected to use it? Or could he accidentally use it and make Terra angry?
Jumping off the couch, I raced out of the room. I knew there was some way to communicate without phones. I'd heard people talking about it. If Aunt Kay knew anything about Ryder, now was the time for her to share.
Unlike the party atmosphere of the Circus Train in the days leading up to the Fire Festival, today the doors on the cars were closed. After a few wrong doors, Goldie finally answered one of the doors I knocked on.
"What's up?" Goldie asked.
Without explaining, I stepped into Goldie's room. Joe was sitting on the second bed. "You okay, Ara?"
"I have to contact my Aunt Kay," I said. "You guys have to help me."
"She made it clear that the Sayges wanted nothing to do with us after the fiasco in Chicago," Goldie said. "I don't know if she'd even respond."
"I have to try," I said. "It's about Ryder. It's possible he's not totally human."
"What are you talking about?" Joe asked.
"His parents. Our parents." I rubbed my forehead while I paced the room. "Aunt Kay said something to me about them being from the Sayge community. I don't know enough about Sayge magic to know how it works. I have to find out if Ryder could be at risk."
"Your parents never seemed to be unusual," Joe said. "Maybe he didn't inherit it?"
"I don't know. I mean, my birth mother couldn't channel magic, but I seemed to get it anyway."
"That could be from Tristan," Goldie said.
"True, but I have to find out. I mean, what if he accidentally does something? I need to know what we could be walking into."
I looked at my friends. They seemed skeptical.
"I'm not sure it will make a difference either way," Goldie said.
"Then for his sake. Nobody told me what was happening to me. It's scary to suddenly have magic. I want to be able to tell him the truth." I walked over to the door and pulled it open, waiting for them to join me.
Goldie walked over to the door. "It's worth a try. Maybe she'll respond if it's from you."
"Thank you." I followed her out into the hall.
"I'll wait here," Joe called after us.
We walked through the train car to the very end. When I thought we'd need to move to the next car, she stopped.
She paused in front of a closed door. "I just don't want you to feel let down if she ignores you, you've been through an awful lot."
"I can handle it," I said.
Goldie opened the door and swept her arm into the room. "After you."