“I never thought that about you,” I admit and smile at him.
“Well, good. Then I’d love to cook you dinner sometime.” His eyes brighten.
“Offer accepted.” I twist the cap back on the bottle of water and set it on the kitchen island.
“Want to see the rest of the place?”
“I’d love to.” I follow in step behind him as we take a different exit out of the kitchen. I am literally in awe as Holt shows me his home. Five bedrooms, seven bathrooms, two offices, a library, a home gym, a small wine cellar in the basement, and even a decent-sized backyard. Most homes in the city have very little space for a yard, but he said a neighbor and he bought the lot that sits between their houses and divided it so they’d each have a yard.
I should say it surprises me, but when you have the kind of money to buy a house like this . . . nothing surprises me. I will say that, even though the home is exquisite, it’s very comfortable. It doesn’t feel stuffy or awkward.
It’s hard not to notice how Holt appears so at ease and laid back here. “And last but not least, I have to show you my favorite place in the house,” he says as we take a narrow stairwell up a long flight of stairs to a small landing. Opening a door, we step out onto a rooftop patio that takes my breath away. You can see downtown Chicago and even Lake Michigan from up here.
“Oh my God,” I say, stepping out further onto the patio. “It’s breathtaking.”
“I know,” he says and sidles up next to me.
There are stone benches built into the perimeter of the patio, with large pots with shrubs sprinkled in to break up the seating. Outside patio furniture fills the center, and a large built-in grill and outside kitchen area complete the space.
“Look.” I point to the dark sky. “The Big Dipper.” My voice breaks as I say it, and I have to swallow hard. Looking at the stars brings back so many memories, good and painful. I will never forget how long it took my dad to show me where it was in the sky and for me to tell the difference between it and the Little Dipper.
“I don’t see it.” He tips his head backward and squints.
“Right there,” I whisper, pointing right at it.
He shakes his head, his arm brushing against mine. “I still don’t see it.”
I sigh. I remember how my dad would point and talk me through finding it and how frustrating it must’ve been for him, but not once did he get frustrated with me. He was always so patient and would help me locate it time and again.
“Come here.” I sit down on a large plush outdoor chaise fit for two. Holt sits down next to me, and we lean back. “See right there.” I point. “Those seven stars. From the end, the stars are Alkaid, Mizar, Alioth, and Megrez. Now go to the bottom left corner. That is Phad. Across on the bottom right corner is Merak and the top right corner is Dubhe.”
“I see it,” he says excitedly and points his finger to the sky. “Aside from a degree in interior design, did you also major in astronomy?” he jokes with me.
“No.” I chuckle. “I did spend a good deal of time taking astronomy and space studies classes, though. Is that nerdy?”
He laughs quietly. “Not nerdy, but I would’ve never guessed that about you,” he says, turning his head to look at me. “What made you interested in those classes?”
I rest my head in my hands and lean back into the plush cushion. “My dad,” I say softly. I fight down the lump that’s forming in my throat. I clear my throat and hope that it masks my emotions. “Before he died, he used to spend hours showing me how to find it. We’d lie out in the grass on the front lawn at the farm, and he’d show me all the constellations he knew. I could never find the Big Dipper, though. I was always looking too high in the sky. He’d say, ‘Lower, Saige.’“ I can’t help but smile at the memory.
He smiles with me. “He taught you well. You knew exactly where to find it tonight.” His voice is soft and caring.
I shrug one shoulder. “I’ve pretty much mastered it by now.” Without thinking, I go on. “For a long time, I couldn’t look at the sky. It made me angry, and I missed him too much. Now it brings me comfort. It’s how I connect with him.”
Holt rolls over on his side and faces me. “Thank you for showing me.”
“You’re welcome. Thank you for agreeing to have drinks with me.” I try to get up from the chaise but Holt stops me. “I should get going. It’s late—”
“Stay with me.” His words cut me off. His eyes, full of want, search mine.
I almost don’t know if I heard him correctly, so I just stare at him in disbelief. “What?” A chill sweeps through me as a breeze picks up, and I run my hands over my arms.
“You heard me, Saige. Stay with me.” His voice grows needy.
“I can’t do that. We can’t do that.” I look up at him. Because I want to do that. But I can’t. I most definitely can’t.