“Bye,” I whispered, and into that one word, that one whisper, I put all of my young love angst, my “never been considered, much less kissed,” my “if I can make them laugh they’ll hopefully never notice that I’m red-eyed and lower-lip trembly when it’s prom and homecoming time”—all of that, squashed into one terribly hopeful “Bye . . . Thomas.”
“Oh my,” Chad said, and I blinked in surprise, brought back to the present, where Chad and Logan were clasping hands and biting their lips, dying to know what happened next.
My heart racing the way it had that day, and without even thinking, I began tugging at my sweater, pulling it down farther on my hips, shrinking inward. “Sorry,” I said, shocked to hear how shaky my voice sounded even to my own ears. “I don’t talk about this very often.” I went to slurp my drink, and found it just ice and melted water, with the saddest little red rim around the lip.
“Another?” Logan asked, and I nodded gratefully. “For the record, I can relate to the never-been-kissed. Casanova over there was super-popular in high school, was covered in tits and pussy from the moment he hit puberty—”
“It’s true. I knew I wasn’t a hundred percent sure I liked guys, but I also knew that anything hot, wet, and warm felt pretty fucking great,” Chad said.
I could easily imagine what a big swinging dick he was back then.
Then he looked toward the kitchen, where his equally handsome partner was fixing another round. “I’ve seen your high school yearbook, and you were smoking hot. The only reason you weren’t covered in tits and pussy as well is—”
“—because I was scared to death of it. Though to be fair, I was scared of dicks, too. But I got over that pretty quickly at lifeguard camp, the summer before senior year. Stephen Tyler . . . mmmm.” Logan trailed off, his eyes going all faraway.
“From Aerosmith?” I asked.
“From Appleton, Wisconsin. I spent the summer up there, and holy shit, could that guy use his mouth.”
Chad waved him over with the drinks. “No more ‘blow jobs from Stephen Tyler’ stories right now—but feel free to tell me about it later, with more details. Right now I want to hear more about Natalie, and her very own Sex and the City stories.”
I smiled ruefully. “It was more like a bad CW show than it was Sex and the City. But it does have the sex. And we were in the city.”
And the city came alive in the company of Thomas Murray, who knew more trivia bits and factoids about Manhattan than anyone I’d ever met. One day we walked up Broadway from Fourteenth Street all the way to Columbus Circle, and he literally guided me through the history of our city as told through architecture. Thomas was planning to be an architect when he completed his master’s program at NYU. In the early days of our . . . whatever it was quickly becoming, I’d spend my days pining my way through calculus and AP English composition, mentally comparing every high school boy in my class to Thomas the College Man and finding them coming up woefully short. He got to study exciting things, fields of interest that would actually lead to something, a career, a real grown-up career, while I was stuck still in high school, spinning my wheels and doodling his name all over everything that would stand still. I’d always been an A student, but for the first time ever, my grades took a dip. And if it wasn’t for it being my senior year and being accepted into all three schools I’d applied to, I probably wouldn’t have been allowed to see him as much.
Although my parents had no idea how much I really was seeing him.
The first time he kissed me was on the third floor of a townhouse my father was renovating. I’d brought him there once after school, after hearing him talk on the phone the other night for what seemed like hours about pocket doors and the architectural significance of them. I’d stolen the master key ring my father always kept inside his briefcase, told my parents I was going to study at the library (not an unheard-of thing on a Friday night, thank you very much), and told him to meet me on Seventy-sixth and Madison.
I’d never done something like this before. But I’d grown up on my dad’s job sites, I knew the codes, I knew exactly how to execute this sneak attack. And when I walked Thomas inside, and he saw the breadth of the renovation my father was taking on, he was in awe.
Looking back now, it was easy to see that not only was he in awe of the townhouse, he was likely also in awe at the ease with which he’d managed to sweep the chubby and slightly lonely daughter of one of New York’s prime real estate developers off her Crocs.
I certainly didn’t feel lonely when he pressed me up against one of those very pocket doors I’d seduced him with, and kissed me until I was seeing stars.
And when his hands slipped around my waist, and I instinctively shrank from his hands on that part of my body, a part that no one ever touched, he tugged me tight against his torso and broke that first kiss. “You’re beautiful, do you know that?”
My heart soared.
“I know most guys mind a little extra padding, but not me.”
My heart soared higher.
His lips kissed a path down my jaw, stopping just below my ear, where he whispered, “Though not too much more, right?”