I couldn’t take it anymore, so I just let go. I cried, long and hard for I don’t how long. He didn’t let go or push me away. If anything, he held me tighter, letting me sob for as long as I needed. Whispering reassuring words to help ease my pain and the hurt I felt in my heart.
“I miss my parents,” I finally let out, bawling even harder. “I miss my parents so much, Esteban. I can’t breathe. I’m suffocating. I don’t think I’ll ever be able to breathe again. My heart hurts so much. It hurts so much every day,” I sobbed unable to control my emotions and needing to tell someone.
To have them understand that I wasn’t a bad child. I just made a mistake. A brutal mistake that cost me my parents’ lives, the only love I’d ever known.
“I know, peque?a,” he murmured, catching me off guard.
I sniffled, sucking in a few breaths before I pulled away, wanting to look at him. I didn’t bother to wipe my tears. He had already witnessed me breaking down and held me in his arms. I could see my fresh tears wet all over his nice black suit jacket.
I immediately felt bad.
“You know?” I coaxed, sucking in a few more deep breaths.
He cocked his head to the side with a sincere, sad smile for me. “I know.”
I bowed my head.
“It’s okay. I understand. I lost my parents too.”
That made me look back up at him.
“I was around your age when it happened. It took me years to recover, but I promise it does get easier as time goes on,” he spoke honestly.
I could tell by his soft-blue eyes. I wanted to ask him what happened to his parents. I wanted to ask him if he ever felt whole again, if he ever felt love or happiness.
If he ever felt… safe.
Something told me that he did. His eyes spoke for themselves, and they answered all of my questions. Which only gave me hope that someday I might have that again, and for an eight-year-old girl, that meant everything.
“Yeah,” was all I could bare to say, even though there was so much more that I was feeling.
Something told me that he knew. As if it was radiating off of me. He affectionately smiled and wiped away a few of my tears, before grabbing the handkerchief out of the front pocket of his suit jacket and handing it to me. I blushed as I took it. All of a sudden feeling shy.
He stood and I followed his lead, feeling even smaller than I already was.
“Hey,” he coaxed, reassuringly squeezing my shoulder. “I cry sometimes, too. Shit happens, Daisy, whether we want it to or not.”
I immediately peered up at him again. No one spoke to me like that besides my uncle, as if I was an adult and not a little girl. For some reason, in that moment, with him, by ourselves…
It made me feel better.
I smiled for the first time since my life drastically changed.
And it wasn’t from the memories of my parents.
At least not that time.
Chapter 3
<>Austin<>
The more things changed, the more they stayed the same. A year went by and it was already summer break again. The boys and I did our usual shit, except now girls started to hang out around us more often. The older I got, the more I started to shed my red hair and freckles from my Scottish heritage on my mom’s side. I started to look more like my dad. My hair got darker, but you could still see an auburn haze running through it in the sun. Which only made my bright green eyes stand out more. For some unknown reason, girls really liked that.
Not that I was complaining.
My skin evened out or maybe it was from all the time I spent in the ocean and sun, surfing and riding bikes. It was rare to find any of us indoors for very long.
We all knew it bothered Alex to share us with all those girls, even though she wouldn’t admit it out loud. In a few short months, she would be attending middle school with the rest of us. It was the other boys’ eighth year and my seventh. It was easy to spare her feelings when she went to a different school, but it was only a matter of time until she realized that we were all growing up. Seeing things she may not want to see. Experiencing things she may not be ready for. I hated the fact that she might feel like she was getting left behind and didn’t fit in anymore, experiencing it firsthand.
We were all aware of Lucas and Alex’s connection, it wasn’t hard to miss. You would have to be a damn idiot to not notice it. I knew the boys were the real reason why Lucas finally asked Stacey out, a girl that had been pretty much on his balls for a while now. Lucas had his asshole ways like we all did, but he would never purposely hurt Half-Pint and this…
This would destroy her.
So when Jacob suggested that we walk on the beach to go to Alex’s parents’ restaurant, a place we all hung out at since birth, it didn’t take long for me to put two-and-two together. Instead of calling him out on it to protect and look out for her like I should have, I went along with it. Mostly because it was easier that way, even though it didn’t take away the piece-of-shit feeling that came along with it. Jacob and Dylan hated the mere thought of them having feelings for each other besides friendship, and that was where it all started…
The rift between us all.