“Fall back!” I don’t know where the voice comes from. It sounds far away. Too far for me to answer. I know I need to be moving, but my body keeps me in place.
More bullets whiz past our hiding place, the tree taking a beating it doesn’t deserve. The gunshots are closer now. The snow on either side of us is pelted by invisible drops of iron.
I look down at the rifle in my hand, wondering how we can get out of this. Perkins is looking for something in his satchel, swearing when he can’t find it. I’m having a hard time making sense of things, and it’s even harder to focus, but I grab onto what I do know.
I lift my face to the sky one last time, knowing what I have to do.
It’s so blue it reminds me of home.
It reminds me of Harper.
A warm hand taps my cheek, bringing my eyes back down on my friend. There’s dirt smeared on his cheekbone and his eyes are more serious than I’ve ever seen them. But he’s alive. That’s what matters.
“I’m gonna get you out of here,” he says. “You’re going to be all right.”
I glance down at his hand, still trying to hold my blood in. I try to laugh, but everything hurts. Everything. Hurts so much I can’t breathe.
There’s no way I can make it back in time.
He knows it.
I know it.
“I’m not going anywhere,” I tell him.
Our guys are still trying to hold them off, but the lieutenant is yelling for us to fall back. By the sound of it, we’re outnumbered.
Perkins is about to stick me with morphine, but I catch his hand. “Don’t, you need to save it. Don’t waste it on me.”
“Kale—”
“Stop.” He finally looks at me and I let go of his wrist, pushing the medicine back at him. “You need to go, and you are going to leave me here. The only way—” My body freezes when another wave of pain comes over me. When I’m able to breathe, my heart is pounding faster. “The only way you’ll get out of here is with covering fire, and I’m not about to see another friend of mine die.”
“You already saved me,” he says. “Now let me save you.”
“Why don’t you do me a favor and make sure you stay alive first.” I clench my jaw and take his hand away from my wound. My fingers are almost shaking too much, but I manage to break off one of my dog tags and press it in his bloodied palm. “Please, Dan.”
“You know I outrank you, right?” he says. “I could order you to let me take you back.”
“You could,” I agree, trying to talk through a tight jaw. If I let it, it shakes too much. “But I’m asking you not to. As my friend. You know what you said about one life being just as important as a hundred?”
He barely nods.
“Yours is worth it.” The last thing I give him is the pack of Lucky Strikes. “Tell the captain thanks for me. For more than just the smokes.”
Perkins is doing everything he can to resist taking me back with him. I pull my rifle into my lap and nod for him to go. “Go the moment I start shooting. I’ll keep them off your back.”
When he leans in, I dip my head and bump my helmet with his. Then without saying another word, I stand, using every last drop of adrenaline I can find, pressing against the tree for support. Sweat drips from my forehead and my visions spins for a moment before I can breathe again.
I don’t need to hit any targets—and probably can’t in the state I’m in—but all I need to do is give Perkins enough time to get back to the line our squad has made behind some fallen trees. If he can make it there, he’ll be safe.
I nod down at him once and he nods back, saying everything he needs to.
Then I swing around and start shooting.
The first three bullets hit their targets before they realize they’re being shot at so close. They take cover, forgetting about the unarmed man darting out from behind the tree.
I keep shooting until I can’t.
Once the clip is gone, I press myself against the tree again. Just in time. Bullets pound the wood even more.
Despite my situation, I smile, because he made it. It’s then I realize—saving one person’s life will be enough for me.
It might not be something heroic or something that’s written into history books, but it’s enough for me.
I did what I came here to do, and now it’s time for me to go home.
I don’t have to wait for the right time.
Or wait for my heart to tell me so.
I’m going because I want to go. Maybe the chance was within me the whole time, or maybe I’m only now able to do it.
Either way, I’m going home.
I have a promise to keep.
44.
Harper
On the second day of Kale being gone, I venture outside after dinner to breathe some fresh air, hoping it’ll calm my nerves. Uncle Jasper and I haven’t left the house all day, and we’ve barely held a decent conversation. It’s like we’re not living in reality right now, waiting for something to happen that shouldn’t exist in the first place.
I walk deeper into the field and away from the house. The sun has set, leaving the sky red and orange with the moon already taking its place. I stand there and close my eyes, listening to the sounds of the crickets and frogs down near the creek.
“Harper.”
I open my eyes, wondering how I can hear him so clearly. Then the air fills with the smell of snow and I know I can’t be imagining it. When I turn around, he’s standing there. Ten feet away and never looking so real.
“Kale.”
He smiles, but it’s wrong. Something dark is smeared on his face, and I take a couple of steps forward, having trouble believing he’s really here, afraid he’s going to disappear again.
“You’re here.” I laugh once out of relief. “You came back.”
“I promised—” His eyes close, warning me something more is wrong. When he opens them again, even with the dark night, I can see he’s in pain. Now that I look closer, he’s unsteady on his feet and not breathing right. “Didn’t I?”
Then I catch sight of something on his upper chest—a stain growing darker and darker against his white T-shirt. It’s blood. I don’t have to see the color to know.
Before I can help him, Kale’s legs fold beneath him and he sinks to the ground.
I yell toward the house, “Uncle Jasper!”
I kneel down next to Kale, pressing my hands against his chest, where the blood is pouring from. It doesn’t seem right that he’s bleeding when there’s no hole in his shirt.
I drag my eyes away, up to his face. “What happened?”
“Aside from getting shot?” His smile is quickly replaced when he sucks in a breath. After he relaxes against the ground, he’s too still. “Our patrol was attacked and we were outnumbered. I told them to go back without me.”
“But what will happen when you go back?” I ask.
“Harper?” I look up and see Uncle Jasper trying to see me through the dark. “What’s wrong?”
“It’s Kale!” I shout back. “He got shot!”