That's right I said sluttily. She is touching him; therefore, she is a slut. I know I am being awful right now, but he disappears from my life after confessing everything he did for me, and finally when I see him again, a cute little blonde in a slutty suit with her aggressively slutty hand is touching him.
I wonder if that is the woman I heard on the phone with him yesterday? I want to go over there, shove her away, and slap him. Then, I want to make out with him. Damn it! I'm going to find a doctor that can give me something for my overly horny vagina.
"Morgana!" My Brain pipes up.
I really don't want a lecture right now from Brain about how I am being judgmental and that I know nothing about that woman.
"Look Brain, I know I am being too critical of her right now, I'm just hurt, alright," I explain.
"Oh no Morgana, she is clearly a slut. I was just going to tell you that if you want to get rid of her I am more than happy to help you out." My Brain is eyeing the blonde with suspicion.
"What? Maybe I should just talk to him. Maybe he got a job and she is a co-worker? Perhaps he is interviewing for the job and they just finished a lunch interview. I would ruin it if I went over there and acted jealous. Besides, we aren’t together anymore. He made that quite clear to me yesterday. He can see who he wants." I try to rationalize.
"Or you could cut her!" Heart pipes up and I notice hatred in her eyes as she stares at the blonde.
"Whoa! Shit just got real! I think I will just have a rational conversation like a normal person." I shake my head.
"Fine. Whatever you want to do. But know this Morgana, we will support you in whatever or however you choose to handle this. And by handle, I mean take care of. And by take care of, I mean cut a bitch..." My Brain surprises me by going along with Heart, who is nodding her head in agreement. I quickly cut her off before she talks about making the blonde disappear or making her an offer she can’t refuse.
I have been watching a lot of Dexter reruns and I think it's getting in my head.
"Ladies. Please. Just, stop."
"Hey Morgana. You ready to head ba... Is that Henrik?" Aria happily skips out the door with her belly full of ham and cheese until she sees what I see and comes to a halt.
"Yup." I am so confused that I can only utter one word.
"Who is that slut he’s with?" Aria notices.
"We told you Morgana. I think they sell knives in the 7-Eleven," Brain adds.
"You know what? I am not going to cut anyone, so let it go," I yell out.
Aria turns her head to me, scrunching her brow in confusion.
"What are you talking about Morgana? I said slut not cut." Aria slaps me on the back as she giggles.
I look back to where Henrik and Ms. Slut were and now they’re gone. My eyes dart around and I see them crossing the street and heading straight toward us. He hasn't seen me and I wonder if maybe I should hide and then follow him. He followed me in New York, so now I can do the same to him. Find out if he is with her or if they just work together.
I quickly dash behind a parked car beside the curb as Aria watches me. She nods in acknowledgement and runs back inside the sandwich shop as she watches through the glass window. I gasp as the car starts and exhaust fumes blast into my face. I have to close my eyes as I gag and cough. Then the car pulls away.
"Morgana?" Henrik’s deep voice calls over to me, and I look up to see him tilting his head with the blonde at his side.
I look frantically down on the ground and see a dirty wrapper, which I quickly grab as I stand.
"There it is." I shake my head and chuckle as I walk over to Henrik. I raise the shiny metallic paper in my hand letting them know I found what I was apparently searching for.
"Fell out of my hand. Thought I lost my lucky..." I examine it closely and discover it's a condom wrapper. Closing my eyes and taking a deep breath before I open them to see Henrik as he tries to cover a laugh.
"Your lucky what, Morgana?" His shoulders are shaking and his hand is now covering his mouth.
Smug bastard.
"Condom wrapper! My lucky condom wrapper. I mean, come on, doesn't everyone have a lucky something? If you think about it, what is worse, a lucky rabbit's foot, which is morbid by the way, or the wrapper from the condom you lost your virginity to?" I raise my brows and nod as if this makes total sense. But as I hear myself, I realize how disgusting I sound. When I glance over at the blonde who is now looking at me like I have the bubonic plague, my suspicions are confirmed: I am revolting.
I drop the wrapper and wipe my hand on my jeans.
"Your lucky wrapper is blowing away Morgana!" Henrik pretends like he is trying to catch it.
"Shut up." I say as I fold my arms over my chest.
"I'm sorry I haven't introduced myself. My name is Morgana Drake. I used to be Henrik's assistant." I smile and hold out my hand to the blonde, who looks like I am about to give her my plague.
"Oh, hi. I'm Zooey Mayer. I'm Henrik's partner." Zooey wraps herself around Henrik's arm and gives a squeeze, still looking at my hand in disgust.
Partner? Like partner for life? Like sexual partner?