"The least you could do," He said. "Is not tell other people what to do."
Jackie shrunk back. Amanda looked like she wanted to melt into her chair out of embarrassment. I started laughing. It was so soft and quiet, but it burst from me like a bubble.
"That's ironic," I said. "When all you do is tell people what to do with those red cards."
I couldn't believe what was coming out of my mouth. It was reflex, an automatic response system my brain had built just for him; insult him, quip back, do something, anything, but don't just sit there and take his shit.
I expected Wolf to stand up and leave, to glare. But he just scoffed, the sound rough but somehow gentle.
"For once, scholarshipper, you have a point."
The tense knot of anxiety in my chest loosened just a bit. It was suddenly just like how things were before the incident yesterday - resentful and wary between us. Nothing had changed, and I was so insanely relieved about it I blurted;
"I have a name, you know."
"It's a terrible one - like you came out of a storybook," He retorted.
"Oh?" I raised a brow, still too scared to look at him, my eyes glued to the paper. "Like Wolfgang's any better?"
Across from us, Jackie smothered a laugh in her throat. Amanda shot her a nasty look, then tried to cover it up with conversation.
"Your name's Beatrix, right?" Amanda asked sweetly. "Isn't that like, Beatrix Potter? The lady who wrote Peter Rabbit? Maybe we should just call you Rabbit-lady instead."
"Wolves eat rabbits," Jackie chimed in extremely not-helpfully, then giggled.
"Not if the rabbits are smart enough to hide," I said. "Everyone knows you have to hide from wolves, or they'll ruin your life."
"Projecting, much?" Wolf asked.
"At least I'm not self-aggrandizing," I shot back and pressed my pen into my paper hard enough to leave an ink stain.
"Look at you and your big words," Wolf sneered. "Yes, we all know you got into this school with your brain, scholarshipper, you don't have to be high-and-mighty about it."
"She does walk around like she's better than us," Amanda said. "I've seen her at break - she never talks to anybody. Are we all just beneath you, Rabbit-lady?"
Anger boiled my stomach. "I - I don't talk to anyone because I don't know anyone! I don't think I'm better than -"
"You do." Wolf smoothly cut me off. "You just don't want to admit it."
My ears went red. "Fine! So what if I do? So what if I think the entire school is an idiot for being hypnotized by your bullshit? All you guys do is talk about cars and clothes and -"
" - how would you know?" Wolf asked. "You've never once spoken to anyone for a long period of time. You’re always wrapped up in reading some huge book."
"Are you keeping tabs on me like some creepy stalker?" I snapped. "Oh, wait, you do that for everyone you give a red card to, don't you?"
"It doesn't take a rocket scientist to realize you aren't the type to make friends easily," Wolf drawled.
"Oh! I saw her talking to Kristin this morning!" Amanda said. "They got like, super close. Really close. I think Kristin has a crush on her -"
"That's -" I sputtered. "That's ridiculous! We only just met."
"That doesn't matter," Amanda sing-songed. "Trust me, I've got a great crush-detector. I can definitely tell she's a, you know, lesbian. You'd make a great couple."
She said it like it was a dirty word, something bad. My skin crawled at her awfulness, but that only lasted until Wolf spoke.
"Enough." He said, so sharply it left me with whiplash. "You're a lot of things, Amanda, but I thought you were better than malicious ignorance."
Amanda crossed her arms over her chest, frowning at me. Of course she was aiming it at me - she thinks this is all my fault. If only I was nicer to Wolf. If only I was less stuck up. If only, if only, if only I wasn't all these things people think I am.
When the bell rang for next period, I bolted from my seat. I wanted to put as much distance between me and everything back there as soon as possible. Wolf was faster, somehow, stepping in front of me before I could get seven paces out the door.
"You're not going to change your mind about taking my twenty, are you?" He asked, walking backwards effortlessly as I strode forwards. I aimed my gaze over his shoulder. His face was still off limits.
"No. I'm never going to take it. I don't want anything you have to offer, and I never will."
He stopped, falling off to the side. I pushed past him and walked up the stairs. I was too afraid to look back, too ashamed. The farther away I got from him, the longer the usual school day went, the more and more I realized he'd been right. I didn't talk to anyone. Sure, I overheard people talking about stupid stuff like brand name bags and what drugs they were going to score for Riley's party, but I never listened longer than that. I always tuned them out.
Friday morning, I went running with Burn again. He ran silently and I not-so-silently huffed and puffed as I tried to keep up with him. He waited for me, again, at the halfway point, and we watched the same beautiful sunrise spread over the horizon. It was peaceful, centering. As much as I hated the running part, it was worth it. It was worth it to just sit here and have all your problems be put in perspective.
If Wolf was right about me being stuck up, was it really such a bad thing?
"Is being stuck-up a bad thing?" I asked Burn. He downed some water from his bottle and offered it to me. I hesitated for a split-second, then took it, waterfalling it into my mouth just in case he was the type to hate second-hand saliva.
"It's only bad if it hurts someone," Burn said after a long consideration. "People call me stuck up."
"Why?"
"Because I don't talk to anyone," Burn said. "And that makes people think I don't like them."
"Yeah, they're just assuming things about you," I agreed. "I think you're pretty chill."
"That's assuming, too." He said. "You've spent a total of four hours with me in your life."
"Four hours is better than none!" I insisted. He nodded.
"I guess."