She was a temptation like no other. Not drugs, alcohol, or the desire for fame had ever called to him so strongly. It made him feel unbalanced, out of control. He wasn’t sure if those feelings were a result of her, or his newfound battle against them. Either way, Chloe had become the one thing he feared the most. A complication. To everything.
The rest of the show, Reid went into autopilot. Every step, chord, and verse was done without thought or feeling. It was almost as if he was floating above the stage and looking down on a complete stranger. It wasn’t until the end, when the last song of the show slowed to a close, that he was hit with the realization that in a matter of hours, everyone would be going their separate ways. Chloe to New York, and him to Tennessee. Anxiety trickled down his spine and his thoughts began to spiral when he considered the possibility of her not showing up in LA.
It was the best-case scenario. He could make it happen. Valerie’s hand had healed. He could cut ties with Chloe and let her go on her own way. He’d given her enough contacts that she’d be set with work for the foreseeable future.
If she moves to LA, he thought.
Time seemed to stop the second he allowed the possibility to enter his mind. What if kissing her had done exactly that? What if he ruined everything by giving in to his desires? Any thoughts of cutting ties and walking away vanished as quickly as they appeared. He wanted to kick himself for avoiding her all day. What had seemed like the best thing for both of them now felt like one of the dumbest ideas he’d ever had.
When the lights flashed bright and blinding, he gripped her hand a little too tightly as he lifted their arms into the air before walking off the stage. He should have let her go, should have dropped her hand the minute they disappeared from the stage, but he didn’t. Instead, he held fast as he walked with purpose past Drew, Greer, and Tom. Past the crew and fans with backstage passes. All the way down the hall and into his dressing room he held her hand, ignoring the curious stares and Chloe’s protests.
“Reid, what’s wrong?” Chloe gasped as soon as the door closed behind them.
He stared at her, his eyes searching, his brows drawn together in contemplation. “You look different,” he said, the sound of his voice foreign.
Chloe blinked, her lips parted with confusion. “What?”
“Shit,” Reid groaned, his hands finding their way to his hair. “I don’t know what the fuck I’m saying.”
“What are you doing?” Chloe asked, her voice soft and, if he wasn’t mistaken, a little bit scared.
A humorless chuckle slipped past his lips. “I have no idea.”
“Well, you’re kind of freaking me out, so if you could figure it out, I’d really appreciate it.”
Reid arched his brow. “No Jedi training advice?”
“Not this time,” Chloe whispered, dropping her eyes to the floor and tugging at the metal piercing in her lower lip.
Reid pinched his eyes shut as he battled against the dread her response caused, as well as the memory of how the slim ring in her lip had felt against his tongue. “I’m sorry, Chloe. I’m so fucking sorry.”
With her eyes still on the floor, Chloe held up her hand. “Can we just forget about it? It was a mistake. I get it. You’re with Jess and you messed up. No harm done.”
“Why didn’t it feel like a mistake?” he murmured, his new proximity causing Chloe’s head to snap up and her eyes to widen. He cradled her jaw with both hands and walked her backward until she was pressed firmly against the door. When he leaned forward, Chloe turned her head and twisted out of his grasp.
“You can’t do this to me,” she rasped, her eyes shimmering. “Don’t be cruel. I don’t deserve that.”
Reid’s chest heaved as he tried to slow his breathing. “God, Chloe. I keep hurting everyone.” He gripped his hair and turned away, his eyes stinging with his regret. “Please don’t quit because I’m an asshole.”
Chloe wrapped her arms around her waist, her eyes pained. “What are you talking about?”
“The tour. Please don’t quit.”
Chloe shook her head. “Reid, this isn’t okay. You and I aren’t supposed to be complicated.”
“Fuck,” he growled, pacing in front of her. “I don’t want to fuck this up,” he said, motioning between them. “I can’t lose you, Chloe.”
“Lose me in what way, Reid? I’m your bandmate. But beyond that, what is there?”
Reid’s heart sank and his shoulders sagged as he processed her words. She was so much more than his bandmate, but he could never tell her that. He was with Jess, and Chloe deserved better than what he was doing.
“You’re my best friend,” he whispered, feeling like a complete asshole. “I don’t know how or when it happened, but you are. I can’t imagine my life without you in it.”
Chloe pressed her palm against her forehead. “We need some distance. I heard you talking to Jess before the show; maybe things will be clearer once you’re back in Memphis.”
Reid’s brows pinched. “I haven’t spoken to Jess today.”