“Gray?” Mia touched my arm, and I jerked. “You okay?”
I nodded and shut the past out, studying the way Sam lifted her hair away from her face. Her smile, so warm that it brought the deadest parts of me to life. She was infuriating, captivating, confusing, and worth every second. Our lines were blurring, and for every inch I backed away, she pulled me twice as close without even realizing it. Being around her was more addictive than the caffeine she survived on, and I was constantly jonesing for a hit…of her.
“I mean it,” Mia added. “She’s good for you.”
“Yeah, well, I’m not good for her.”
Problem was, I wasn’t sure it was a good enough reason to stay away from her anymore.
Chapter Eleven
Sam
“Bye!” God, where was that damn hang-up button?
Mom’s face disappeared from the screen, and I rested my forehead on the laptop for a moment. She’d been utterly disappointed in my choice to enroll in a “beneath me” community college, but she said she’d pay for it, which was more than I could have ever hoped for.
I clicked open my email and weeded through the mess until I got to a name I didn’t recognize. [email protected]. My fingers tapped absently above the keys. Get over your shit.
Right. I opened the email and my stomach dropped.
How did you like your latest rejection? Once a whore, always a whore. Too bad you can’t sleep with them to let you in. Just. Stop. Trying.
Shaking hand and all, I closed it.
It was what I deserved, right? My penance for my sin. One hundred Our Fathers and thirty-two harassing emails.
It didn’t matter anyway, right? I had a fresh start on Monday and time to rebuild myself. Yeah, until you apply at another school…or finally face it at Colorado.
Oh, I was totally pulling a Scarlet O’Hara on that one—I’d think about it tomorrow. Or never. Whatever.
But this, I could stop now. I might deserve it, but if I was going to move past it, I couldn’t have it thrown in my face every time I checked my email. I adjusted my settings and only let in known email addresses to my inbox…and Victoria’s Secret. I could never have enough Vickie’s. Or chocolate.
One click at a time, I took back this aspect of my life.
This definitely called for brownies.
I skipped down the stairs and almost ran smack into Grayson as he was coming up. “Hey!” Did that come out as breathless as I felt? The guy usually sucked the oxygen right out of my lungs the minute he entered the room, but in an ACU flight suit? Holy shit. For someone who’d never even wanted near a soldier…well, I wanted to be very near Grayson. Like within a breath. A touch. Under him. Over him. Pinned between his yards of muscle and the wall.
“Hey yourself.” His eyes lit up like he knew exactly what I was thinking.
“Good day?” I forced out.
“Great day. I passed my 5&9 test.” His eyes danced, and I found myself grinning like a lovesick moron, but I couldn’t help it. He looked happier than I’d ever seen.
“Oh yes, this is definitely a brownie kind of day. I’m going to get your kitchen so dirty.” My nose scrunched while I tried to pull off the innuendo.
He didn’t so much as flinch, just kept that intense Grayson-stare. “I have to leave in about an hour. Our flight to Nags Head is tonight.”
My shoulders stayed straight, instead of slumping the way I felt, like a balloon that had been popped. He’d just been there last weekend. “Well, Ember is on her way, so I guess that leaves more for us.” I pushed a smile out.
“Save me one. I’ll be home Sunday.”
I nodded, and he tucked a strand of hair behind my ear, once again depriving me of oxygen. Somehow he felt lighter…easier after passing that test.