Nate grinned. “Apologized, huh? I think I’d like that apology.”
Bliss giggled. “Nate leave him alone. It’s good to see you again, Cruz.” She started to say more, then paused and smiled at something over my shoulder. “There they are,” she added.
I glanced back without thinking and my eyes locked on Lila Kate. She was stunning. Her dark hair was curled loosely and brushed her shoulders. The midnight blue dress she was wearing hugged her curves so damn sweetly I had a hard time looking away.
“Should I get him? Or do you think she wants him to stay with her?” Bliss asked.
Get who?
“Leave it. She seems to want him with her,” Nate replied.
I tore my gaze off Lila Kate to see a tall blond guy with his hand possessively on her back. His expression was serious as he listened to something she was saying. Who the fuck was that?
“Who is with her?” I asked since they obviously knew.
“That’s Eli, my best friend,” Bliss said with a pleased smile.
“How does she know him?” Lila Kate wasn’t one to bond with someone fast.
“They had been spending some time together before you rode in on your bike and took off with her,” Nate replied. He was amused. He knew why I was asking and he was fucking amused.
“She wanted to go with me,” I told him turning to glare at his smug expression.
He nodded. “Yeah, she did. But now,” he tilted his chin up toward Lila Kate. “She wants Eli. Lesson learned fast I’d say.”
“What the fuck does that mean?” I snarled taking a step toward him.
Nate didn’t back away. But then I didn’t expect him to. He took a step in my direction. His expression went cold. Hard. “It means Eli is a good guy. The staying kind. That’s what it fucking means,” Nate’s voice was low as he said the words.
“She barely knows him,” I argued.
“But she knows you enough, now doesn’t she,” he shot back.
We were at a funeral. That should be why I stopped and walked away. But it wasn’t. It was because Nate was right. She did know me. I could have parked my bike and gone with her. That’s what a good guy would have done. But I’d fucked her, dropped her off and driven away. As I let myself think about it I had to admit that might have been the coldest thing I’d ever done. And I’d done some pretty cruel shit. I turned my gaze back to Lila Kate and Eli. He was whispering something to her and she smiled. The smile wasn’t the radiant one I knew.
It was sad. Her eyes didn’t glow and light up the room like I knew they could. She’d lost someone, and Eli was there with her. That’s the kind of guy she needed. I had left her because she needed to move on from me. I just hadn’t fucking expected it to happen so fast.
“She deserves more. You know it. Let her have it,” Nate’s voice annoyed me simply because he was right. I didn’t say anything to him. I just walked away. Back to my family. I would get through this damn funeral and leave quietly. I’d forget what happened with Lila and me. Eventually.
As I was walking away I felt her eyes follow me. The best thing to do would be to ignore her but I couldn’t. I met her gaze. She didn’t smile. She just looked at me with eyes so full of disappointment it burned in my gut. She’d ruined me. Just like I was afraid she would.
Lila Kate
ELI’S HAND HELD mine as I studied the private mausoleum that was for all Slacker Demon members and their family. My grandmother was the first to be buried in it. Kiro had bought it because he said he didn’t want to be buried in the ground and he didn’t want his Emily in there either. So he’d decided that the best way to rest in eternal peace was a mausoleum with those he loved most.
“I’ve never seen anyone laid to rest in one of these. Just been to burials,” Eli said softly beside me.
“Me neither. It seems easier than watching them sink into the ground doesn’t it?”
He nodded. “Yeah, I guess it does.”
I focused on my grandfather as his bloodshot eyes stared straight ahead at the marking where Emily had been slid in. He was drinking from another bottle of whiskey. I was concerned he was going to get alcohol poisoning, but my mom said he’d built years of tolerance to the stuff. He’d be fine. His suit covered his tattoos but he still looked like a rocker. It was in his stance, face, the way his hair was still too long for an older man. He would always be Kiro Manning. Even at seventy years old.
“Thanks for staying with me today,” I told Eli. I had needed someone. Support. Everyone had been here. They all knew I’d been on Cruz Kerrington’s bike and they all saw him completely ignore me. But my grandfather’s grief had been more important than my obvious snub from Cruz. I’d gotten what I asked for playing with fire.
“I’m glad I came. Almost didn’t. Nate thought I should. I’ll have to thank him for that.”
Nate had expected this. He knew Cruz as well as I did. We had been a pack once. I needed to thank Nate for bringing Eli. Not that I was going to use Eli as a rebound. But he’d become a good friend. After today, I hoped we would stay in touch. I enjoyed his company. He was strong. Dependable. Kind. The type of man I knew my parents hoped I would find one day.
When my heart finally healed and I moved on, I hoped I would find a fairytale with a guy like Eli. I knew it wouldn’t be Eli because his heart was already unavailable. I sympathized with him. Loving someone you will never have is painful.
At least he hadn’t suffered humiliation because of it. He’d kept his feelings a secret. Never made the mistake of throwing caution to the wind and hoping it worked.
“Let’s go,” I said as others began to leave. I knew my grandfather would be here for a while and I wanted him to have his alone time with her.
Eli continued to hold my hand as we walked away. I knew the Kerrington’s were to my left. I could see Woods and Della from the corner of my eye. But I didn’t turn to them. I just couldn’t bring myself to. I walked on with my head down. Eli led me to the limo that was waiting for the family.
“Where are you going?” I asked him.
He nodded toward the limo behind this one. “To Dean’s with Nate and Bliss.”
Being with Nate and Bliss wasn’t easy on him. I knew that without asking. “Come with me,” I said.
He smiled like he understood why and could read my thoughts. “Thanks.”
I moved all the way down to the last seat. “You saved me today. I should be thanking you.”
He moved in behind me and sat with his thigh pressing mine. The warmth from his body, the smell of his cologne all made me feel soothed. Like I wasn’t alone. I remembered this from our one night together. I knew the difference now, between good drunk sex with no strings and sex with a man your heart wants. It’s on two different playing fields.
“You were beautiful today. He’s an idiot, and from the way he watched your every move he knows it.”