I reached inside and found an envelope, sealed with wax that bore a picture of a harp.
It was not a small envelope either. How had I not noticed the imprint of it even before I put my head down? How had the chambermaids not noticed when they made my bed?
It was as if the envelope had appeared out of nowhere. Magic.
I carefully slid my thumb beneath the seal.
Dear Princess,
Are you content, trapped within the walls of your castle? Do you ever wonder what it might be like to dance the night away to wild song, to hear drums that pound in time with the beat of your heart, to feel a man’s warm embrace as he holds you close?
If you do not, then toss this letter in the fire.
If you do, then join us! These wicked revels are meant for girls such as you. Leave the letter under your pillow and wear your slippers when you come to bed tomorrow. The gate shall open at midnight.
—The King of the Revels
I glanced over my shoulder, masking my excitement with my most proper face. This must be it. This was my invitation and tomorrow night I would find out where my sisters had gone to wear out their shoes.
I sobered. I was the only blood daughter of my mother. She wouldn’t like this at all. In fact, it might break her heart, for me to disappoint her like this. If I was a dutiful daughter, I should give her the letter and confess.
Drums that pound in time with the beat of my heart…
Even the phrase itself was like poetry. It was what I dreamed of, to lose myself in music…
With a man’s warm embrace?
I had never considered that. My mother had kept me well away from young men, kept me innocent. I had never dared to think of an embrace. It was hard to even imagine anyone embracing me. When I was dressed in my stiff gray garments and shawl, I was not like a flesh and blood person anymore. I felt like a wooden figure.
I shivered. Who was this King of the Revels? How did he sneak this letter into my room? And how would I get to the ball? There were guards posted in the hall outside my door, and more guards outside watching the palace walls.
I dropped to my knees beside the bed, clasping my hands to pray for an answer, but instead of praying, I just held the letter. My breathing was heavy, straining against the corset that Mother insisted I wear to bed, to keep my figure. My nightgown was tight around my neck and wrists.
With one thrust of my small hand, I shoved the letter under my pillow.
I shut my eyes and bit my lip. I have done something very wrong, haven’t I?
I lifted the pillow, but the invitation had vanished. I looked everywhere, to make sure it hadn’t just fallen behind or gotten caught inside the pillowcase somehow. Once I knew it was gone, I got to my feet. My body swayed slightly, as if against my will.
It felt like surrender.