Michael owns my mouth, but with that same thought, I’m pretty sure I own his. It’s as if we’re fighting a war to see who can claim victory. When he lets out a half-muted growl and I swallow it down, I feel like I am the clear winner. I feel as if I’m in control.
As if that’s the signal they needed, my fingers move up to tangle into his thick hair. Michael’s hands move down to my ass, biting into the flesh as he pulls me up his body. I break away from his mouth, as my feet leave the floor. When he pulls me up to him, he claims my mouth again, and he kisses me deeper. I wrap my legs around his waist, our tongues continuing their war with one another, my fingers fisting tightly in his hair, holding him to me.
I can feel desire course through my body. I’m not acting on anything but need and instinct, lost completely in the taste and feel of Michael. He pulls me even tighter into him, and the heat from his body is so hot, it feels as if it could burn me. I’m wet with desire. I feel it pooling against my panties, and coating along the inside of my thighs. I want more…I want more of Michael. I’m lost in a fantasy where I can be a woman who doesn’t have baggage, who doesn’t have scars. A woman who can just enjoy the moment. And then it happens.
Maggie picks that moment to push out hard. Her kick pushes against Michael. I pull away from his mouth immediately—it’s that strong. She kicks again, and this time, Michael must feel it because he pulls on my ass, giving us a little distance between each other. I hold my head down, afraid to look at him and feeling helplessly embarrassed. Then I remember, I’m pregnant, and he’s holding me up in the air.
I immediately unlock my legs, and he lowers me to the ground. I don’t know what to say to him. I’ve never experienced a kiss like that before in my life. I can still taste him. I’m already missing him and the connection we had forged. He moves his hand back to my neck and forces me to look up at him.
“That shouldn’t have happened,” I croak, my voice sounding as if I haven’t had anything to drink in weeks.
“You’re right,” he says, and disappointment blankets over me like a thick fog. Before I can even process that, he’s places a kiss on my forehead and turns to leave.
I’m so confused and my hormones are raging. I don’t know up from down right now, and the fact that he’s leaving only adds to that. I don’t try to stop him, though. It’s best he leaves. It’s best I get control of myself—alone.
“It definitely shouldn’t have happened,” he says again, as he opens the door. My fingers are touching my lips. I can still feel his pressed against mine. My body still feels like sparks of electricity is arcing through it. “It’s probably going to happen again, though,” he growls as he leaves, closing the door behind him.
I just stand there. I couldn’t tell you for how long. A few minutes, maybe longer, I keep standing there, touching my lips and staring at a closed door. All the time, in my head, I’m trying to figure out how I feel about Michael’s declaration, because only one thing is sure about all of it. Michael didn’t sound happy about it at all.
50
Beast
What the fuck was I thinking? Kissing Hayden was the single most, stupidest thing I’ve ever done in my life. That’s saying a lot considering I let Jan lead me around by the nose for fucking years. I’d like to say it happened because she said she didn’t see me as a man, but the truth is I’ve been thinking about kissing Hayden for days. I never should have done it though, because I can still taste her.
It’s the next day, I’ve barely slept. I didn’t even drink. Instead, I walked the perimeter of Hayden’s house. When I wasn’t doing that, I sat in the dark remembering the feel of her ass in my hands and her legs wrapped around me. Her taste is haunting me. A mixture of sex and honey, more addicting than anything I’ve ever encountered in my life. I’m only sure of two things at this point. I’m in deep shit when it comes to Hayden Graham. I need to stay away from her, because she deserves much better than me. Maggie deserves better than me. Hell, if I could figure out a way to protect them both without getting close to them at this point…I would.
The other thing I’m sure of is that my dick is most assuredly not dead. I’ve been hard since Hayden wrapped her legs around me. I’ve been hard all night, remembering the feel of her body and the taste of her lips. It’s the next day and my cock is still demanding attention. Attention he is not getting.
I down the last of my coffee, draining my cup. Hayden left for work two hours ago. I know because I watched her out the window like a fucking pervert. She didn’t even look towards the barn. Is she running scared after the kiss? Fuck, why wouldn’t she? Why I had to force the issue, I don’t fucking know. She probably won’t let me back in her house—not that I would blame her. Hell, it wasn’t that long ago she suffered a panic attack that scared the shit out of me. There’s no way I should have touched her, pulled her body against my hard cock so I could press against the heat of her, kneaded her ass with my fingers, and drank from her mouth like a fucking man dying of thirst. Thinking about it now sends a shudder of need through my body.
I reach down to adjust my cock, which is throbbing. If I was another man I would have pushed Hayden up against the wall and fucked the hell out of her. Fucked her so hard she would have felt me for days. Fucked…Hayden…a pregnant and obviously emotionally scarred, Hayden. Jesus.
I’ve got to get a handle on shit. I need to be clear headed to deal with the threat of the Dwellers. I don’t know what’s going on, but I can’t let my guard down when it comes to Hayden and Maggie. I need them safe. That’s the reason I ended up jumping in my truck as Hayden disappeared down the road this morning. I followed her, staying far enough behind, she wouldn’t have an easy time of detecting me. When I was satisfied that she made it to work safely, I came back home. Yet, I’ve been worrying nonstop since I got back. I would have done better to just campout in the diner today.
Frustrated with myself, I pick up my phone to call Skull. I let it ring until it turns over to voicemail. If I didn’t know better, I’d say the fucker was giving me payback for ignoring his calls. Can’t say as I blame him. I need to spend the day doing something that will exhaust me. Working until the last thing I can think about is fucking Hayden. Fucking anyone. It might not be that it’s just Hayden, maybe it’s because I’ve been so long without sex. Even as I think it, I know I’m lying. It’s Hayden I want. It’s just as I feared, she has snuck under my defenses somehow. I should figure out how to stop it before it gets worse.
Maybe I could fix Hayden’s front porch. The damn floor is swaying. It’d be dangerous if she walks on it; it could collapse. If she fell, it could hurt the baby. I’ll need to run into town and get some wood and work on the supports underneath the porch first. I haven’t really eaten yet either. Maybe I could swing by the diner for food…
Motherfucker.
51
Hayden
Beast: Learning to Breathe (Devil's Blaze MC #5)
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