He looked down at the floor.
“I didn’t think so.” I swallowed. “And even without the romantic connection we had, if I’d told you that I was in trouble, told you everything like I wanted to that first night . . . the first phone call you would have made would have been to my dad.”
“Damn right I would have. It would have been the smartest thing to do to keep you safe.” He stalked closer. “Do you know what those men could have done to you? Do you have any idea how bad this could have been for you?”
I shuddered. “I know.”
“So how about you try explaining this to me again. What in the fuck was going on inside that pretty head of yours?”
“That I was tired of being my father’s prisoner. I was twenty-three, and barely allowed to date. Especially not Troy. Dad hated Troy. Never wanted him in my life. He kept saying, ‘I can tell that boy’s a bad egg, young lady, mark my words.’ Of course, being forbidden just made me run to Troy faster.”
I let out a short, bitter chuckle. “And then it turned out Dad’s hunches were right all along. I discovered Troy’s secret. He was deep into some crazy shit. But if I’d admitted that to Dad, that would have been the end of it. I probably wouldn’t have been allowed to date or do pretty much anything until I was thirty-five. There was no way I was going to let that happen.”
“You were going to fix things with your own two hands,” Nolan said. Was that a hint of respect in his voice?
“Yes.” I nodded fervently. If I could just make him understand . . .
“And I was your backup plan.”
My mouth dried up. “Only at first. You became so much more than that. Once I got to know you . . .”
“Was it all fake?” he asked, his tone soft and sad.
“No, Nolan. Of course not.”
“Stay put,” he muttered.
Turning away from me, he stalked into the bathroom at the end of the hall. I heard cabinets open and jars clinking around. I wondered if his hands were shaking as badly as mine were.
The tears swimming in my eyes threatened to fall. I needed to hold it together long enough to make him understand what he meant to me. To make him see that this was real. I prayed for the right words to come.
Seconds later, he returned carrying a first aid kit. He stopped in the kitchen to grab a bottle of water and a sleeve of crackers from the cupboard before stomping back into the living room. He tossed everything onto the couch cushion beside me.
“Eat. Drink,” he commanded, his voice rough.
“Nolan, please talk to me. I’m sorry. I’m so very, very sorry.”
He blew out a frustrated breath and grabbed the water bottle to unscrew the cap. “Drink,” he said again, thrusting it at me.
Trying to please him, I took a small sip. My parched throat thanked me, and I took a longer swig.
“Did they touch you?”
His voice had softened. As mad as he was, he still cared. Of that I was certain. My heart squeezed in my chest.
I handed him back the water. “No, not like that. They were rough, shoved me around, but I’m okay.”
Those two idiots were part of Troy’s old crew. I had no idea why they thought I’d have his money or drugs since I was never involved in any of it, but that hadn’t stopped them from taking me and demanding to know where his stash was. My fingers went to the bump at the back of my head again. It was still throbbing.
“Let me see,” Nolan said, dropping down to kneel before me. Tenderly, he lifted the hair off the back of my neck, and felt the hard knot with careful fingertips. “Let me tend to this.” He opened the first aid kit that sat beside me and began removing items. Gauze. Antiseptic.
“Can I take a shower first?” I was desperate to get the stink of that house and those men off my skin.
“Will you be okay alone in there?” He studied me with sharp eyes.
Was he offering to help me shower? No, he’d probably ask Daniella to do it—a thought I couldn’t stomach.
“Yes, I’ll be fine.”
He nodded once. “There are towels under the cabinet. Leave the door unlocked in case you need anything.” In case you collapse, I suspected he meant.
“Okay.” I rose on shaky legs and started toward the bathroom.
“Lacey?” he called out from the living room, where he still knelt on the floor.
“Yes?”
“When you’re done in there, we need to talk.” His tone left no room for negotiation.
I nodded, my throat tightening. “Just so you know, I was going to tell you everything. I wanted you to come over so we could not only talk about our relationship, but so that I could tell you the truth about my past, who my dad was, everything.”
He made a grunted sound that I couldn’t distinguish.