By the time I had finished eating, I considered my efforts a great success, because Lottie had warmed up considerably and had actually entered into a conversation about Tara’s latest beau, a good-looking groom.
But doesn’t he always smell like horses? I imagined Lottie’s nose wrinkling in disgust, though her tone was mild enough. It amused me to picture outrageous expressions on the faces I had crafted for each of the servants I had come to know. Just one of the ways in which I kept myself from going crazy while trying to interact with a large number of invisible people. I longed for an ordinary conversation, without the extra strain that came from communicating without body language.
He does sometimes, admitted Tara. But he’s so perfectly delicious to look at, that I’m willing to overlook it. She giggled.
I think I would prefer a footman or, or a gardener, or something.
Oooh. Tara almost dropped the blanket she was busy folding. A particular footman or gardener perhaps?
No! Lottie rushed to deny the suggestion, but Tara laughed triumphantly.
She’s blushing again, she informed me. I think there is someone. Come on, Lottie, tell us. We promise we won’t breathe a word to anyone, will we, Princess Sophie?
“Oh, absolutely not.” I shook my head. “Who would I tell anyway? It’s not as if I would even know if I bumped into him in the corridor.”
Or the gardens, said Tara. Although I think he’s a footman. I’ve never seen Lottie lingering around the roses in her time off.
I don’t linger anywhere, said Lottie with dignity, but Tara ignored her.
I’m trying to think where I’ve seen you when you’re not here. Wait! I’ve seen you around the entrance hall a few times.
“What does that mean?” I found her flow of logic rather fascinating.
The footmen all have different areas of service. She sounded distracted. Three of the footmen in that section of the castle are already married, so that leaves… She trailed off, presumably to run through the remaining footmen in her mind. Connor and Robert are the best looking. I know several serving girls who are sweet on them, but Robert is so loud, it’s hard to imagine our Lottie being interested in him.
Goodness, no, interjected Lottie. He’s obnoxious.
“Well, that’s definitive. What about Connor?” I frowned. “And why does that name sound familiar?”
I think he was in the kitchens that first night, said Tara. Probably acting surly and suspicious of you.
“Oh yes, I remember now. Surely he’s not the one, Lottie.”
I think it’s Samuel, announced Tara. He’s cute but not too good-looking, if you know what I mean. Sort of friendly-looking and really sweet.
“He sounds perfect!”
Stop it, you two, Lottie mumbled. He’s not perfect.
I laughed. “Just perfect for you?”
Maybe. Her whisper was so quiet I could barely hear it.
Tara laughed again. She’s blushing even harder now. I think you’d make a wonderful couple. Is he sweet on you back?
Lottie sighed. I don’t think he even knows I exist.
Well, we definitely need to change that!
Lottie gasped. Don’t you dare!
You’re too shy to speak two words to him, aren’t you? But if he could just get to know the real you, underneath, I’m sure he would like you.
They began bickering light-heartedly, and I smiled to see how Tara had managed to break through Lottie’s reserve. It occurred to me how easy I found it to listen to them, and to separate their voices. I no longer had to strain to make my mind receptive. With practice, and possibly trauma and stress, my mind had adjusted to this new form of communication. Now all I wished was that I could see them. And that Lily could be here to share in the fun.
Eventually they both insisted I go to bed and, sure enough, I slept for a solid twelve hours. When I awoke the sun was shining, and I knew my first stop of the day would be the Beast’s chambers. It had been strange to spend an entire day so disconnected from his recovery after being so absorbed in it previously.
Chapter 17
I arrived at the Beast’s chambers to the sound of raised voices. I sighed, closing my eyes for a moment before stepping in through the door.
Oh, thank goodness, said Henshaw. You’ve arrived. He raised his voice. Everyone else out.
I frowned. Did he have some terrible news to impart to me? I looked over at the bed, afraid I would see the Beast had regressed. But he was sitting up in bed, glaring at me.
Well it’s about time. He sounded sour.
I raised both eyebrows at him, and he looked away.
“Being troublesome, is he?” I asked, not bothering to lower my voice. His shoulders twitched, but he didn’t look back around.
Henshaw’s quiet voice sounded in my ear. He hasn’t been what I would call pleasant, no. I’ve seen the magic you can work, so I’m hoping you can calm him if I just give you some space. But call me if you need. I won’t go far.
“I’ll do my best,” I promised, and he murmured a farewell.
Walking slowly over to the bedside, I glared at the Beast. His eyes skimmed the presumably now empty room and fixed on me. When I woke up, you were here, and old Henshaw told me you had hardly left my side. Where have you been?
“Excuse me?” I put as much icy outrage into the words as possible.
He frowned at me. I wanted to speak to you, but Henshaw refused to let anyone fetch you. He defied me—all of them did! My own servants, in my own castle, during a momentary weakness! He ground his teeth together.
“Well, good for them,” I snapped. “I didn’t know they had it in them.”
He growled quietly, so I picked up a heavy book from a small table beside him, lifted it over my head and let it drop back onto the table. It landed with a loud bang, and he fell instantly silent.
“If you act like a wild animal, Your Highness, I will treat you like one. If you wish to have me here, at your bedside, I will not endure roars, growls, or abuse of any kind. And I will also not listen to any insults toward your servants. For three full days and nights, we attended you tirelessly, nursing you through an illness that could have been deadly. And you dare to criticize me for finally resting once you are out of danger? Or them for placing the well-being of another person before your every whim? You are arrogant, entitled, and self-absorbed. They may put up with you as their employer and prince, but I can assure you that I will not.”
I stopped, sucking in huge breaths as I tried to calm myself. It was the second time I had exploded at the Beast, and it felt good to express my true feelings. I thought he might order me from the room, but he did not. I sank down into a chair, and for a moment we both sat in silence.
Eventually he spoke, his voice cold. I have a memory from when I was fevered. I thought it was real, but it must have been merely a dream. I thought that you were here, and that you thanked me for saving you.
“You remember that?” I flushed slightly.