I decide to take the rest of the day off, even though I’m supposed to go to English in the afternoon. I have Atonement with me, so I go to Starbucks, buy a vanilla hot chocolate and spend the next couple of hours reading in the corner. I am completely alone and it is blissful.
I don’t even bother making notes; I just read until the pages run out and then I sit, slightly dazed, forced back into the real world. A couple at a table near me are trying to name all seven dwarfs, but have stalled at five. A girl on my other side is scowling at her laptop and jabbing at the keys with angry fingers. When did these people come in? What time is it?
I put the book down and pick up my phone. It’s almost 3 p.m. and Tem has sent me four messages escalating from a casual ‘Hey, I have news, message me!’ to a final, desperate ‘STEFFFFFFFFIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII’.
I finish scrolling and smile at the string of messages, then type out a reply.
Steffi:
I’m in Starbucks. What’s up?
Tem:
THERE YOU ARE.
Here I am!
I KISSED KARAM.
I hesitate, waiting for the jolt of surprise to pass so I can work out what I’m feeling. Obviously I know she likes Karam, but as of yesterday she was still playing it cool. And it’s the middle of the day!
Steffi:
???
Wow! I think I need to hear the details?
Tem:
I can see your disapproval in nine words, Brons.
I’m not disapproving!
SURE. Well I’m coming over tonight,
so you can practise being excited OK??
OK!
Awsum. Right after school, k?
Was it a good kiss?
Yes.
?
I’m really not disapproving. Just . . . cautious. Protective. That’s the best friend prerogative, right?
I’m still holding my phone and I look at it, nibbling on my lip, then tap the jackbytes icon. The screen loads.
[stefstef is online]
[rhysespieces is offline and cannot receive messages]
stefstef: Sorry.
[rhysespieces is online]
[stefstef has gone offline]
Tem is giddy with happiness when she arrives at my house after dinner. She throws out a cursory ‘How are you?’ on the way to my room, but I know it’s not the time to start telling her about my sort-of argument with Rhys – was it an argument? – so I just smile and reply that I’m fine. She is too excited to notice my sort-of lie – is it a lie? – and does a running leap on to my bed, bouncing a little like a child before settling down on to crossed legs.
‘Go on, then,’ I say. Her happiness is infectious. ‘Share.’
She does, in frankly unnecessary detail. I learn more than I could ever need to know about Karam’s kissing technique – ‘Just enough tongue! More each time, like a taste test.’ – and how his hair feels under her fingers.
‘He calls me Tember,’ she says, beaming. ‘Isn’t that the cutest? Tember.’
‘So is he going to be your boyfriend?’
Her smile blooms ever wider. ‘I don’t know. I hope so . . . but it’s early days, obviously. And it was just a kiss.’
‘Just the first kiss,’ I correct, because this is the kind of thing we do for our friends.
Tem beams. ‘Just the first kiss,’ she repeats. ‘The first of many.’
‘Do you want him to be your boyfriend?’
She nods. ‘Of course! Stef, it’s all I want. He’s just . . . everything.’
‘That sounds dangerous,’ I say.
‘In a good way,’ she replies.
‘Is there a good kind of dangerous?’
She laughs. ‘Just you wait, Stef. Just wait.’
stefstef: hey
rhysespieces: hi
stefstef: so I finished Atonement rhysespieces: oh yeah?
stefstef: yeah
rhysespieces: did you like?
stefstef: yeah.
rhysespieces: cool.
stefstef: is it still OK for me to borrow the DVD?
rhysespieces: sure, if you want. or you could come over and watch it at my place?
rhysespieces: . . . if you don’t mind having to put up with subtitles.
rhysespieces: or my cat.
stefstef: would that be OK?
rhysespieces: sure. i haven’t seen it for a while.
stefstef: OK . . . when?
rhysespieces: you got plans after school weds?
stefstef: sorry yeah, I have to work.
rhysespieces: Thurs?
stefstef: yeah, could do that rhysespieces: cool. let’s say thurs after school then stefstef: ok
rhysespieces: ok
stefstef: rhys?
rhysespieces: stef?
stefstef: i’m sorry.
rhysespieces: i know.
Here is how you say sorry in BSL:
Close your dominant hand into a fist. Hold your fist to your chest and move it in a circular motion. Make eye contact while you do it.