“That was before I made plans to leave the island.” A pause. “Roslyn, lesson number three of being an assassin is always assume everyone is lying.”
“What if someone caused a distraction inland?” Visylla asks. “We could draw them away from the ship.”
“We’ve already done that once,” I say. “They won’t fall for the same trick twice.”
Everyone falls silent, and no more ideas are forthcoming. I simply stare out at the ocean, watching those ice-cold waves crash onto the shore.
Cold to everyone except me.
I wince as I remember my time alone on the ocean floor. It was horrifying, something I never want to experience again. But I know what I must do if I’m to save everyone.
“I need to go around,” I say.
“Around what?” Kearan asks.
I point to the west. “The tree line meets up with the ocean over there. I could slip into the water, swim to the ship, then board her.”
No one says anything for a moment.
“How would you manage that without dying?” Shura asks, speaking up for the first time.
“Cold doesn’t affect the captain anymore,” Enwen says. “She’s half undead. ’Twas an unfortunate accident.”
“What?” Captain Warran bellows.
Kearan silences him with another look.
To Dimella, I say, “I know you don’t like me going off alone, but this might be our only chance off the island.”
She nods. “I think you have the right of it. We can’t risk waiting for nightfall with everything that’s hunting us.”
“We don’t have time for me to silently kill the whole crew,” I say, more to myself than everyone else. “I’ll be the distraction so you can approach the ship. When you hear them sound the alarm, you’ll know they’re sufficiently occupied and it’s safe to board.”
“Just don’t get yourself killed.”
“I’ll do my best.” I point over my shoulder. “Fill in the crew of the Wanderer on everything that’s happened. They need to be prepared for the worst.”
“Aye-aye,” she says.
“I’ll walk you to the beach,” Kearan says.
I don’t argue with him. I leave Roslyn in Enwen’s care before following the edge of the tree line toward my destination. Kearan is silent at my side, matching my strides.
“He knows what we’re planning,” I say. “I saw one of the undead at the camp. It overheard my orders to the crew. He’s definitely coming.”
“He won’t catch up,” Kearan reassures me. “We’ll be on that ship sailing away before he gets here.”
“He will catch up eventually. Even if we get away today, even if this is the only ship on this island—which I doubt it is—then he will swim after us. He doesn’t need food. I don’t even know if he needs rest. Nothing can harm him. It may take months or years, but he’ll make the swim to the Seventeen Isles.”
“By then, Alosa can be prepared to handle him. She’ll have her mother and the charm ready. He won’t be able to hurt anyone else.”
“If he gets me—”
“He won’t.”
“If he gets me, do I have your word that you will help Dimella get everyone safely home and warn Alosa?”
“I already told you—”
“Swear to me,” I say, my voice rising. “I need to hear it right now. Roslyn needs to get home to her papa.”
Kearan doesn’t slow or skip a beat. “I swear it.”
“Thank you.” His vow makes me want to reach out and touch him. I hesitate for several seconds, before reminding myself that I’m not afraid of anything.
I reach for his hand, despite how unnatural the gesture is for me. But my forwardness is rewarded by him threading his fingers through mine.
It feels incredible, even if it doesn’t feel the way it should. There’s a humming in my chest, a nervous flutter that is delicious and unlike anything I have ever felt before. It is nice to touch him. To be touched by him. Even though I cannot feel the heat of his body.
Kearan must read my thoughts because he says, “We’ll find a way to put you back to normal.”
“Threydan said it can’t be done.”
“Since when do we trust that bastard?”
“We don’t.”
“Then don’t lose hope. You said it was a siren artifact that made you this way. Maybe Ava-lee knows a way to fix it.”
I hadn’t considered that the siren queen might have answers for me. It is a possibility, if a small one. But that’s all one needs to hope.
“Thank you,” I say. “For last night. For the hope you bring. For the promises you keep. I won’t forget any of it. Ever.”
“You are my captain. You do not need to thank me for such things.”
“And if I weren’t your captain?” I ask.
He turns his head to face me. “I would still do them for you, Sorinda.”
I want to ask him why. What does he see in me? The same things I see in myself? Or new ones that I never even noticed? Does he know about the things I see in him? His kindness and bravery and thoughtfulness and fierceness. There are other things, too, things that cannot be explained.
They can only be felt.
And I do feel them for this man. This kind soul who’s never demanded anything of me. Done nothing but be there for me, even when I did not deserve it. He’s always been what I needed. He’s always done what I needed, including hiding his feelings until I was ready to know about them.
How could I have kept him at a distance forever?
When we reach the beach, I stare out at the dark blue water and shudder.
“It’s not like before,” Kearan says. “You’re in control. You can change your mind if you don’t want to do this.”
“I can’t,” I say. “Not if I’m to be a good captain.”
“Then you admit you’re a good captain?” he asks.
I smile, and Kearan’s lips part.
He swallows. “Your smiles are rarer than diamonds and infinitely more precious.”
I frown. “Don’t quit piracy to become a poet.”
“Ha.” He nudges me with a shoulder. “I’m serious. It is a lovely smile.”
“Thank you, but watch what you say else Enwen will never let you hear the end of it.”
“Don’t I know it.”
I’m glad for the banter. It lessens my nerves and helps me see my task more clearly. I’m doing this for all of them. If we pull this off, we’ll have completed the task set out for us—despite all the complications that have come up along the way.
“It will be hard to move about the ship when I’m sopping wet,” I say, thinking of this for the first time.
“You could always undress and carry your clothes above you in the water.”
“That won’t exactly help in the area of stealth now, will it? Besides, it would slow me down.”
“Aye, but I’d have a nice image to reminisce on as I returned to the crew.”
My mouth drops open, and Kearan flashes his teeth in a smile.
“We’re fighting for our survival, and you want to be flirty now?”
He shrugs. “I haven’t had the chance to before now, and we might die.”
Truer words were never spoken. “Don’t expect me to reciprocate. I don’t know how to flirt.”
“Yes, you do. You just don’t do it with words.” He eyes my side, where he knows I have at least a couple of knives tucked away.
“You’re a strange man.”