Why? I wanted to ask. Are you not leaving the US then? But I didn’t know if I had the courage to ask him that. A part of me didn’t want to hear the answer. I didn’t want him to leave, but that was unfair. Because I wasn’t staying in Green Oak, either. I was leaving soon.
Cameron’s body shifted on the blanket, coming closer to me. I was shaking again but it wasn’t because I was cold, and I think Cameron knew that. “Looking forward to returning home?” he asked.
“I don’t know.” I looked down at my feet. Home. “I thought I’d be glad when this whole thing came to an end, and I could go back to my life. But I… It’s strange. I’ve never felt like I wasn’t part of the Miami Flames, but the more time I spend here, the more detached I become. Like I was never part of them. Not really.”
Cameron’s palm settled on my thigh, the weight and warmth seeping through the thick fabric of the pants he’d insisted I wore. He squeezed, those long fingers tightening against my skin in a way that made me think—wish—he was doing more than just that.
“I always dreamed of being in charge of the club one day,” I heard myself confess. “You know, take over from my father. Maybe that’s why I didn’t hesitate to come here. It was a way to redeem myself and earn back his respect after I embarrassed him.” The words I’d heard David say that day returned. “Although, I don’t think my father ever fully believed in me. And I guess I proved him right.”
“Stop that,” Cameron said from my side. “Stop justifying every single person who treats you like rubbish.” His brows furrowed, and when his lips parted I knew the question that was coming out of them. “What happened, love?” he asked me, voice soft. “What was done to you for you to break like that?”
Break.
I had broken, hadn’t I?
Yes. There was no question.
Blood rushed to my head at the scattered memories of that day, the clip, but most of all, of Cameron’s reaction to seeing it. His words.
I would have done everything in my power to protect you.
“Nothing was done to me.” I stumbled over my words, feeling my hands shake and setting the thermos beside my hip. “I am the only one responsible for my actions, and believing otherwise would be stupid. And immature.” I shook my head. “What happened is not worth wasting this beautiful night with you.”
Cameron’s palm lifted off my thigh and landed on the back of my head. His fingers slipped into my hair. He tilted my head so I would look at him. “Let me be the judge of what’s worth my time,” he told me, all that softness melting away.
And I could see it in his eyes, clear as the day. I would have fucking cared. Tell me. Trust me.
So the words rolled off my tongue. “My ex, David, had been lying. Using me. And my father had been part of it.”
Cameron’s eyes darkened with an anger that reminded me of last night, of his reaction to seeing the stupid clip. For a second, I’d thought he’d release me, that he’d move away, but instead, his touch turned more possessive, more intent, against the side of my head. As if he was scared I’d go somewhere. Or perhaps he thought I’d break again.
“Turns out, I’d been nothing but collateral in a business transaction,” I told him. And God, I felt sick to my stomach hearing the words. Allowing myself to think of it for the first time. I pushed through. “David had never wanted to date plain ol’ Adalyn. He’d only wanted the daughter of Andrew Underwood. And my dad had encouraged it because we just… made sense. David was the son of a business partner and I was his daughter. Same circles, same age. He…” Cameron’s expression tightened, and I let out a humorless laugh. “He promised David a high management position in the club if he married me. Like I’m some… stock or possession you exchange. Or worse yet, like he didn’t believe David—or anyone—would do that without some kind of motivation or compensation. I don’t know.”
No words came out of the man in front of me. His only response was a brush of his thumb against my jaw. Soothing. Encouraging. All while a storm brewed behind the green of his eyes.
“My father wasn’t wrong,” I continued. “David had never intended to marry me. Probably not even date me, seeing as I am ‘frigid, boring, and forgettable in bed.’?” I gestured in air quotes. Those were his exact words. And I shouldn’t care but… I did. A part of me did. “That’s why the moment he’d locked in the position, and it was announced, he dropped me like the dead weight I was. ‘Dodged a bullet,’ he said.” A humorless chuckle left me. “I can’t even imagine how mad my father must have been when his plan not only backfired, but he ended up being extorted by David.”
I could almost picture my father’s face. The way it contorted when something didn’t go his way. And what was stranger, how could someone who had played so many people be played like that? I couldn’t understand.
“Extorted how?” Cameron asked, making me realize I was lost in thought.
“David threatened to come clean if my father fired him or demoted him.” The day of the incident with Sparkles had been the anniversary party and there had been pre-celebration drinks. I knew what alcohol did to David. It made him cocky. Braggy. “I overheard David. He was so happy, telling all of this to… Paul. Sparkles. He was blabbing all his secrets to the mascot of the team. A giant bird made of polyester. Right there, in the stairwell, where anyone could have heard. As if this was some locker story you shared with your teammates instead of… my life.”
I stopped talking, needed a second to myself. Focusing on Cameron’s touch.
“I felt so incredibly small,” I continued, voice breaking. “Deemed unsuitable by David. Incapable of handling one of the most natural things in life by my father. Not enough. And what was worse, I felt betrayed by the club I’d given so much to. Sparkles being the one listening to all of this made it so much worse in some bizarre way.” My voice wavered again. “So, when I saw the silly bird shaking his ass in the middle of everything and everyone that represented the Miami Flames, not even ten minutes later, as if nothing had happened, as if my whole world hadn’t been turned on its axis, I did break.”
Cameron’s eyes roamed all over my face, my body, in a desperate, aimless way. And when they finally returned to mine, I recognized the question in them. So I nodded—how could I not—and before I could so much as blink, he was settling me on his lap and bringing me to his chest.
“The last thing I remember is walking toward Paul,” I whispered, and Cameron’s arms came around my shoulders and waist. Tighter. As tightly as I’d ever been held. “Then, Sparkles’s head was at my feet.”
Cameron hummed deep in his throat, the sound reverberating against my body.
“I wouldn’t blame you if you thought I was crazy,” I heard myself say. “Seeing as even that way, even after everything I heard, I’m here, proving myself to them. To him. Instead of confronting them.” My voice turned into a murmur. “But I guess I’m not that brave. And I still messed up. I hate messes. I’m usually the one who cleans them up.”
That club was everything I knew. My life was the Miami Flames and, therefore, my father. So what else could I have done but try to win them back?
“Do you want to hear what I think?” Cameron asked.
I closed my eyes, burying my head beneath his chin, sticking my nose right into his chest. God, I loved it here. I loved how solid he felt against my skin. How safe. I didn’t want to lose that. “No, I really don’t want to. But I also know you’re going to tell me anyway.”