“Maybe this speech will open a floodgate for you. Once you get through it, you’ll see some of that inner strength I know you have. And I’m telling you, when and if you share your recovery journey, you never know who you might inspire.”
Dash did not respond. It was taking a lot of his inner strength to not tell Chris to back off. And Chris, to his credit, must’ve realized Dash wasn’t going to take the bait.
“I’m just saying that it’s been a long time since you’ve said yes to anything,” Chris said. “If you keep shutting everything down, you’re going to miss out on your life.”
“Jesus, Chris, the guy just came in the door.” Mira padded into the room in slippers and sweats. Her hair was wet but fell in loose curls across her shoulders.
“He’s going to become one of those reclusive types with a million cats...”
Mira rolled her eyes at Chris. She took Luna from him, and the baby instantly burped. “First of all, cats are a gift to this world. He should be so lucky to have a million.”
“Mira is a bit of a hoarder,” Chris whispered to Dash.
Mira knocked Chris with her hip. “Thank you for watching Luna, Dash. I came home from work and finally got to shower. You’re a good friend. That’s what you should’ve said, FYI.”
“Okay, fine, you’re right.” Chris gave Mira a knowing look, and she smirked back.
Dash turned away from their moment. He needed coffee, so he found a mug in their cabinet and intended to fill it all the way to the top. But the words Chris had said bubbled up to the surface of his thoughts. If you keep shutting everything down, you’re going to miss out on your life. Dash didn’t shut everything down. He’d had to scrape away so much of his old life just to be secure in his sobriety, but that didn’t mean he wasn’t living...
When he turned back to tell his friend as much, he saw Chris and Mira sitting on the couch. Luna’s head rested against Mira’s chest, as she gripped Chris’s index fingers with her hands.
He’d always thought he’d be a dad, but he now knew he wouldn’t be able to have a family. What if he relapsed at some point? He couldn’t imagine having a baby, a little Luna of his own, and then putting them through a life where he may or may not be drinking.
Chris had been sober for five years before even considering the idea of a family. He’d met Mira, and eventually they had Luna. He should’ve been able to see Chris as a role model, but Dash wasn’t like Chris. And he realized, in that moment, that he was an outsider looking in on what he would never have.
SOPHIE’S TIKTOK
Ex number one
Name: Serenity
Occupation: Yoga instructor
Length of relationship: Four months
Reason for breakup:
Serenity wanted an open relationship
Weeks until book is due: 5.5
“I should be writing. I’m sitting at my writing desk, surrounded by the books I love most, and this would be a perfect time to finish my second book. But I still have writer’s block.” Sophie was flanked by bookshelves—her happy place. She’d organized the books by romance trope—fake-dating and second-chance on one row, slow-burn and Regency on another, billionaire, forced-proximity, and friends-to-lovers all in a line. Her enemies-to-lovers book collection took up two full and glorious rows—by far her favorite.
Sophie clocked the framed photo of her and her mom on the desk and had a twinge of guilt. She sighed deeply, then continued, “So instead of writing, I’m meeting up with one of my exes to see if they can help me figure out why I’ve never fallen in love. Because yes, I know I need help, and I’m not afraid to ask for it. But before I tell you about the first one I decided to reach out to, who I will call Serenity for privacy reasons, I wanted to lay out the rules for who I’ll be meeting up with.
“One, we must have dated for more than three months, which is the threshold for whether a relationship is a relationship, in my opinion. Two, I must ask the question Why didn’t we fall in love? And three, I need to ask if they’d ever be open to dating me again. After all, I write romance, and second-chance romance is a big and beautiful trope in my world. I’d be missing out if I didn’t at least explore that option, right?
“Serenity is spiritual, and thoughtful, and all around a much better person than me. I’m sure they’ll have some great insights into why we didn’t work out. So let’s all do a little sun salutation and hope that I don’t say anything too humiliating and that this experiment helps me to learn more about why I can’t say those three very special words.”
COMMENTS
@JessErrera you got this!!
@EditorLynnHere Friends-to-lovers is my favorite trope, for the record. ??
@Lizzy4Cats Yoga instructor thirst traps. Look them up.
@NoelleLovesBooks You know what they say about yoga instructors...
@FloWithMe no, what?
@NoelleLovesBooks they’re heavily meditated
@FloWithMe ??
@tokcrafty2me good vibes only
5
SOPHIE
Cardio was not Sophie’s thing. But she wasn’t sure if carrying a yoga mat while speed-walking counted, exactly. Still, the overhead afternoon sun made her sweat through her sports bra and caused her thighs to rub together in a deeply unpleasant way. So yeah, it counted as cardio.
The first ex she was meeting up with was Jewel—aka Serenity—who led a weekly Vinyasa yoga class in a nearby park. Jewel was decidedly not a dramatic person—not just because their entire life was devoted to finding inner peace but because they’d made a point of ending the relationship on good terms. Well, relationship wasn’t a word Jewel would’ve used, so much as coupling. But still, after four months they’d uncoupled, and Jewel had told Sophie she would always be welcome in class despite their mind-body-soul separation.
When Sophie arrived, there were two rows of people on their mats, seated in Lotus pose, with their eyes closed. Gregorian chants played softly in the background, and there, in bicycle shorts and a fitted tank top, was Jewel. Their hair was buzzed, drawing more attention to their thick, dark brows and strong jaw.
Sophie hoped to go unnoticed until the end of class and took a seat behind a woman and her Pomeranian, both of whom had matching pink hair. She was late, and the class had already started. She laid out her mat and moved into Downward Dog, as Jewel instructed. As Sophie’s eyes closed and she exhaled, she felt something poke her big toe. Her head whipped around, but there was nothing on the mat. She readjusted herself, closed her eyes and...poke, poke, poke. Yes, there was something pointy repeatedly nudging her foot. She jumped off the mat with a squeal, no longer caring if Jewel saw, because what the hell was underneath her?