He often offered me that, but alcohol and I don’t vibe very well, so he learned to get me cola whenever I came over to the haunted house.
I can’t help studying his face in search of a sign of deceit. Considering he’s possibly the definition of the word, it’s strange that I find no trace of it.
My gaze skims over his outwardly peaceful expression. His usually dangerous lips are set in a neutral line, and even the mole beneath his right eye that usually looks menacing is now just a welcoming beauty mark.
“What’s with all of this?” I sign.
“I told you.” He swirls the red liquid in his glass with the elegance of a demon lord. “A date.”
“Why here and not in a restaurant?”
“You find them tedious and less personal, so I opted for a more intimate experience where you can have all your favorite dishes instead.”
I mentioned that several weeks ago and he still remembers it so well. Seriously, I’m starting to think he has an elephant’s memory.
In my internal musings, I nearly forgot I was staring. To which Landon smiles broadly with a perverse sense of satisfaction.
I clear my throat. “Why are you taking me on a date? It’s not like you believe in normal.”
“I don’t, but you do.”
“But—”
“Can you stop asking pointless questions and just eat? Look at what I cooked for you.”
My lips part and I pause before I grab the spoon. “You cooked these?”
“Of course.”
“Of course? Why are you saying that as if it’s a given? You never cooked before.”
“As I’ve mentioned countless times, I’m a fast learner. You’re welcome.”
I cast another glance at the food and then take a tentative sip from the soup. The rich taste explodes in my mouth like a home-cooked meal. Before I know it, I’m done with it.
I move to the pasta, and it tastes even better than the soup. The lamb is a knockout, but I choose to take my time with it, partly because I’m almost full and I want to savor what I’m eating.
A sudden breeze ruffles my hair and goosebumps erupt on my naked arms. For some reason, the sensation doesn’t seem to be entirely related to the cold. I lift my gaze, and my mouthful of food gets stuck at the back of my throat.
Landon, who I assumed was also eating, is not. His undivided attention is dangerously focused on me, head on his fist as he swirls the wine glass with his free hand.
I swallow the contents of my mouth with effort and slowly set my utensils on the table. “What do you want?”
“Should I want something?” he replies with disturbing nonchalance.
“You always do.”
“Hmm. Maybe you’re right and I do want something.”
“Which is?”
“To get my fill of you, which I’ve been doing spectacularly.”
The temperature rises in my chest and forms knots at the base of my belly. I try and fail to control the unconscious reaction as I sign, “You want me to believe that the great Landon King would settle for such a trivial thing?”
“I couldn’t believe it myself, but I also wouldn’t categorize it as trivial.”
“You mean to tell me you’re content with this very normal date and wouldn’t trade it with chasing or choking me?”
“What type of blasphemy is that? Of course I would. But, apparently, it’s better to go against my instinct in situations like these. I don’t really get the hype about emotions, but I’m trying.”
“Trying to what? Have them?”
“Nonsense.” His lips lift in clear disgust and he drowns it with a sip of wine. “I’m trying not to use my understanding of emotions in a destructive manner. At least, not with the people who matter.”
Thump.
Thump.
Thump.
My heart nearly explodes from behind my rib cage. I breathe in and out slowly, attempting, no, refusing to be caught in the web of Landon’s chaos-driven world again.
“Does that mean you didn’t consider your other options?”
“What other options?”
“The girls who throw themselves at you ready to satisfy your wildest kinks.”
“The only girl I want to satisfy my kinks is you, so everyone else is redundant.”
I swallow thickly, my heart rate still refusing to go down. “Are you telling me you weren’t tempted? Not even a little?”
“No. I quit going to the sex clubs after you came into my life.”
“You went to sex clubs?”
“All the time. I used to go there mostly to satisfy my exhibitionism kink.”
“And you don’t need to now?”
His eyes darken. “Absolutely not. The thought of anyone seeing you naked turns me murderous.”
I clear my throat. “I don’t know what caused this change, but it doesn’t matter. If you hurt my family again, Jeremy included, not only will I never share space with you again, but I’ll also make it my mission to destroy you.”
“Oh?” A sardonic smirk lifts the corner of his lips. “Did you mention a form of destruction?”
“Do you think I’m joking?”
“Far from it. Which is why I’m taking the risk.”
“Risk?”
“I told you this whole sentimental gibberish doesn’t come naturally to me.” He takes another sip of wine and stares into the starless sky in the distance.
“Then how do you intend to learn it versus merely emulating it?”
“As I’ve continuously mentioned, I happen to be a genius.”
“Intellectual IQ is worlds apart from emotional IQ. You might score two hundred on the former, but you’re minus two hundred on the latter.”
He clicks his tongue, the first sign of annoyance peeking through the creasing lines around his eyes and mouth. “I’m far more superior and efficient than fools who let their feelings dictate their actions. What’s so high and mighty about having emotions?”
“You really don’t get it, do you?” I sign without any sense of anger or disappointment. I’ve always thought of Landon’s condition in the clinical sense, or maybe as I blamed him for all the shit he keeps stirring, but this is the first time I’ve realized he probably doesn’t know anything else.
He’s never experienced any of the normal emotions many of us do. No genuine love, sadness, heartache, or anything of sentimental value.
The fact that he can emulate them doesn’t mean he can feel them. It’s why he’s lethal when he gets hold of other people’s weaknesses.
His lack of both empathy and guilt makes him the ultimate mental weapon.
It’s also why he gets irritated when forced to act opposite his nature.
“Get what?” he asks in an unfamiliar tight tone.
Landon’s strength is his ability to not get agitated or ruffled, like an ancient, untouchable god with thousands of followers.
He’s right. It’s different now.
He’s definitely trying to go against his fundamentals and it’s throwing him off. For some reason, a part inside me softens and I can’t help feeling a tinge of joy that he’s trying to act different.
For me.
Not anyone else. Just me.
I shake my head and choose to focus on something else instead. “If you want to learn emotions, I can help.”
“Oh? I thought you were a self-proclaimed emotionless bad bitch.”
“Bad bitch, yes. Emotionless, no. I just enjoy teaching those who mess with me or my family a lesson. Anyway, let me ask you.” I take a sip of my cola. “From your family and friends, who do you think of when you hear the word love?”
“What is this? Amateur therapy?” He scrunches his nose as if he smells something foul. “Why does everyone seem to have an imaginary license lately?”
“Just answer the question, Landon.”
“Mum and Dad. Next boring question.”
“Why do they come first?”
“Ever since I was young, they’ve always respected, worshiped, and taken care of each other. They’ve never had a fight that lasted more than a day. They love each other to the point of obsession, if you ask me. Too much PDA for my liking.”
“Have you ever thought about having a relationship like theirs?”
“No. Because I don’t see the hype about the love and compromise strategy they employ in their marriage.”