“Don’t you know I’m the shady motherfucker?” Ryder grinned, all teeth.
Cody cracked up. “Hell yeah, man. If I didn’t know you, I’d cross the street if I saw you coming. Why do you always look like you’re about to commit murder?”
“Now you’re just hurting my feelings.”
It felt good. Joking with Cody this way. Easy the way it used to be.
He could feel the change coming. The fact he hadn’t been high in two weeks was proof of that.
Ryder had come to realize there was no outrunning the shame. He couldn’t cover it or distort it, and he knew there was no fucking way to blot out the sound of his mother’s voice. He’d tried, but it didn’t work, and it might fucking destroy him to let himself feel the full force of it, the grief of losing her, but it was time.
The truth left agitation clamoring through his spirit.
Because it wasn’t like he could dust off his hands and walk away from the life he’d been living, but however it went down, he was going to find a way.
Cody drained his beer and slammed it down on the table. “Now, if you don’t mind, I think I’m going to go take Luce up on her offer.”
“Ah, I see how it is, ditch me to get your dick wet.”
“Don’t blame a man. Have you seen her?” Cody pushed out of the booth, dug into his wallet, and tossed two twenties onto the table. “Do you want to join me? Her friends are usually game for a good time.”
Ryder polished off the last dregs of his whiskey. “Nah, man, think I’m going to call it.”
“Your loss.”
“I’m doing you a favor. Luce gets a closer look at me, and we know it’s your ass that’s going to be getting ditched.” He grinned as he slid out.
Chuckling, Cody leaned in and clapped him on the back, the teasing going nonexistent. “Fuckin’ missed you, brother. Thank fuck you’re coming through.”
Ryder clapped him back. “I’m right here, man.”
Ryder pushed out the swinging door and into the night. The sound of country music and the clatter of voices faded behind him as he crossed the lot and took the side street, heading in the direction of his duplex.
He stuffed his hands into the pockets of his jeans, enjoying the feel of the cool breeze on his face.
He’d walked since he was only a couple blocks over.
It was about eleven-thirty, and most of the town was sleeping, only a few intermittent cars passing by, a peace in the air as he took a turn at Elm. He was almost to Manchester when something drew his attention to a deserted parking lot.
The glare of red taillights where a car was parked beneath a big tree and hidden in the shadows. He didn’t know what it was, but a stir of energy cut through the tranquility.
Tossed it into chaos.
A feeling that beat like a drum in the middle of his chest.
And he guessed he wasn’t even all that surprised when the front passenger door suddenly burst open and Dakota stumbled out, barely able to catch her balance as she wheezed, clutching at the top of her dress that was ripped at one side.
“Stay away from me. I said no,” she gasped through the jagged words.
Ryder was already moving that way by the time the prick climbed out from the driver’s side, the slur of his words that he spat over the top of the car dumping acid into Ryder’s veins.
“You think I’m going to let you play me like that? You bitch. You should be thanking me for even asking you out.”
A horrified sound scraped out of her lungs. “You’re such an asshole, Seaton. Screw you, I don’t want anything to do with you. Stay away from me,” she tossed back.
But it was already too late for poor Seaton.
Ryder descended before the bastard knew he was there, coming out of the darkness like the monster that he was.
Rage tore through his bloodstream.
Aggression breaking him in two.
He took the asshole by the back of the head and smashed his face into the edge of the roof.
Shock raked from Dakota, the attack coming from out of nowhere, while the prick wailed in agony. “What the fuck?”
It earned no sympathy from Ryder.
He kept him upright by the back of his shirt, spinning him around. “You think you can touch her when she said no, you fuckin’ pussy?”
Ryder tossed a blow to his already busted face. The asshole cried out, and he stumbled back from the force of the hit.
Ryder went after him, throwing another punch that sent him wheeling back before he dropped to his ass.
“Ryder, oh my God.” Dakota rushed around the car, her heels clattering on the pavement. “Ryder,” she begged. “Just leave him.”
There was no leaving him for Ryder, and he dove for him, pinning him to the ground. “Little fucker, I’m going to make you regret ever speaking her name.”
The asshole writhing on the ground spat blood in Ryder’s face. “Do you know who I am? You can’t touch me. I’ll destroy you for this. Over a fat fucking whore who’s terrible at sucking dick.”
Fury clouded Ryder’s sight. Darkness seeping in at the edges. Taking over.
Every time he’d ever sat with Dakota under the cover of that tree while she’d cried over something one of these ignorant pricks had said burst through the dam.
An assault of memories.
The comfort she’d found in him.
The way he’d always wanted to be there. Protect her. Every vain promise he had made.
The shame over walking away.
Every bit of it got taken out on this asshole.
Ryder threw fist after fist.
Dakota’s pleas barely dented into the mayhem.
“I’ll kill you, you piece of shit.”
And he probably would have, too, the way the bastard went limp and stopped fighting back, if it wasn’t for the blip of the siren and the blinding glare of the headlights and spotlight that cut into the madness.
It was an SUV pulling into the lot. Sheriff was painted on the side, and a crackled voice shouted from the speaker. “Hands in the air. Right now.”
Lungs heaving for air, he sat back, his knees digging into the pitted pavement as he slowly lifted his hands above his head.
“Oh, God, Ryder.” Dakota wept from somewhere behind him, and he could feel her fear. Her confusion. The horror of what had just gone down whirling around her sweet spirit.
Both doors on the SUV cranked open, and the sheriff on the driver’s side came around the front. He had his gun drawn and aimed at Ryder. “Slowly move to the side and lay down on the ground. Facedown.”
Ryder complied, nerves clattering through him as he did. He’d always been so careful. So fucking careful. But protecting Dakota was worth any cost.
Any consequence.
Except he cringed when the second officer came into view.
Ezra.
His cousin who’d just graduated from the academy and had gotten hired on at the department two weeks ago.
Shame poured down.
He knew what they were going to find when the older officer stepped over him and handcuffed his arms behind his back, before the officer began to pat him down, digging into his pockets.
He pulled out the two baggies.
It wasn’t much.
But it was enough to have Dakota whimpering and Ezra wheezing, “Fuck, Ryder,” under his breath.
It was bad enough there was an asshole with a smashed face unconscious off to his side, and in the distance, the shout of another siren echoed through the air.
A minute later, an ambulance and another sheriff’s patrol pulled into the lot.
Ryder was dragged onto his feet and turned, and his gaze tangled with Dakota’s.
Cinnamon eyes were wide and full of fear. Terror and disbelief. Shock rolled through her body. The girl shaking so hard you’d think she’d been rescued out of a frozen lake.
A paramedic wrapped a blanket around her while the others tended to the fucker who was currently moaning on the opposite side of the lot.
Ezra was the one who guided Ryder to the back of the SUV and forced him into the backseat. “What the fuck were you thinking, Ryder?” Remorse leached into his tone, and he kept his voice low so only Ryder could hear. “You know I can’t cover for this.”
“I wouldn’t ask you to.” He would never get him involved in his mess. His attention skated to where Dakota numbly nodded at whatever the paramedic was saying.
His chest pulled tight.