Dirty Thirty (Stephanie Plum, #30)

“What’s in this for you?” Ranger asked me. “What have you got to gain by proving Plover committed a laundry list of crimes?”

“Nothing,” I said. “What’s in it for you?”

“Nothing,” Ranger said.

“But we’re going to do it?”

“I don’t like unfinished business,” Ranger said.

“And there are the cats. If something terrible happens to Nutsy’s mom, who will take care of the cats?”



* * *




Nutsy was watching television and eating Froot Loops out of the box when we walked in. He looked at Ranger and all color drained from his face. Ranger took the remote off the coffee table and shut the television off.

“I told Ranger everything,” I said to Nutsy. “He’s going to help us.”

“Stephanie said you had the jewelry evaluated. Do you have that in writing?” Ranger asked Nutsy.

“No,” Nutsy said. “I had Big Al look at it.”

Big Al ran a pawnshop on Broad. It was next door to one of Vinnie’s rivals, Tip Top Bail Bonds.

“Big Al would know,” Ranger said, “but I’d like to see the pieces.”

“It’s all in Duncan’s attic. We put everything into a box marked ‘Christmas decorations.’?”

“Clever,” Ranger said. “Let’s take a look.”

Ranger took the scenic route to Duncan’s perfectly organized house so we would have a chance to check out the beggar dudes. It was still too early for prime-time begging and we didn’t see Marcus. We parked at the curb and walked to the front door. Ranger had us inside before Nutsy could find his key.

“How does he do that?” Nutsy whispered to me.

“I haven’t a clue,” I said.

We walked through the house and Nutsy released the stairs that led to the attic. He climbed the stairs and returned with the “Christmas decorations” box.

Ranger opened the box and we all looked inside. The jewelry was in a jumble. Some pieces were wrapped in tissue. Some were scattered. An earring here, a ring there.

“This is a mess,” I said.

“You should have seen it when it was in the garbage bag,” Nutsy said. “The few pieces that might be worth something we wrapped in the tissue paper. It’s not like they’re actually real, but we thought they were pretty.”

“We need to have this professionally evaluated and cataloged,” Ranger said to Nutsy. “In the meantime, I think it would be interesting to have you pay a visit to Plover.”

“He’ll shoot me!”

“Not with his security guard looking on. Not during business hours. And not in front of Stephanie. She was hired to find you. She’s going to bring you to Plover to prove she found you. She’s going to collect her finder’s fee. She’s going to tell Plover that you’re unarmed and would like to talk to him. Then she’ll tell you that she’ll be waiting outside.”

“What will I say to him?”

“In a quiet voice that the security guard can’t hear, you’ll tell Plover that you have his jewelry, and you know he wants it back. Tell him that terrorizing your family isn’t a step in the right direction because it makes you angry. And when you’re angry you’re not in the mood to negotiate.”

“Yeah, that’s good,” Nutsy said. “What else?”

“That should be enough. You don’t want to do a lot of talking. He’ll ask you what it is that you want. Tell him you want two hundred thousand. And you want him to leave you alone.”

“Do you think he’ll do that?” Nutsy asked.

“No,” Ranger said.

“What about the security guard?” Nutsy asked. “What if he shoots me?”

“He isn’t going to shoot you,” Ranger said. “You aren’t armed, and you aren’t threatening anyone. And he’ll know that Stephanie is waiting for you outside the store. The guard can remove you from the store but that’s the extent of his power.”

“I guess that’ll be okay,” Nutsy said. “If I yell, you’re going to come rescue me, right?”

“Right,” Ranger said.

Ranger cut across town and pulled into the Rangeman garage. We met Tank, Ranger’s second in command, on the fifth floor. Tank served in Special Forces with Ranger, and he lives up to his name.

Ranger handed the Christmas box over to Tank. “Give this to Kevin Mealy for an itemized assessment and send Sal to my office with a wire. I want the Cobalt N317.”

“Do you want it to feed into your cell phone?”

“Yes.”

We followed Ranger across the room to the cafeteria. Nutsy and I got coffee, Ranger and Bob got water. Sal was waiting with the wire when we got to Ranger’s office.

“This is high-tech but simple,” Ranger said to Nutsy. “It’s a wireless wire. It’s about the size of a quarter with a sticky pad on the back. We’ll put it on your chest under your shirt. If you get nervous and sweat, it should still stick to you. I’ll be able to hear everything that’s going on, and if things go south, I’ll step in.”

“Should I try to get him to incriminate himself?” Nutsy asked.

“No,” Ranger said. “It wouldn’t hold up in court. This is just for your safety.”

I knew this wasn’t true. That is, the part about it not being legal evidence was true, but the part about Nutsy’s safety was only partly true. Ranger wanted to hear how Plover responded to the threat. Ranger had doubts about Nutsy’s version of the crime.

On the way out Nutsy stopped and looked in at the control room. “This is unreal,” he said. “This is Tom Cruise stuff. I could set a book here and sell it to the movies.”

Ranger cut his eyes to him. “No.”

Plover’s store was a short distance from Rangeman. We parked half a block away and Bob and Ranger stayed behind. After Nutsy and I were in the store, Ranger and Bob would move a little closer. The Cobalt N317 was sexy but it didn’t have great range.

Nutsy walked beside me, looking nervous.

“Are you okay?” I asked him. “This isn’t going to be a big deal. Plover is going to behave.”

“It’s not Plover who bothers me. It’s Ranger. He’s even scarier than I imagined. And his office building is a fortress. He probably has one of those searchlights on his roof like Batman.”

“The searchlight was on the roof of the Gotham City Police Department. It was used to summon Batman.”

“Whatever,” Nutsy said. He suddenly gasped and looked down at his chest. “He can hear me, can’t he! Crap!”

“Don’t worry about it. Everyone thinks he’s scary.”

“Except you.”

“He’s just scary on the outside. Inside he’s a big gooey marshmallow.”

I struggled not to laugh when I said it. I knew Ranger was listening and would be horrified. And then the horror would turn to amusement, and he’d plan his revenge.

It was still early for jewelry shopping and there were no customers in the store when Nutsy and I entered. The security guard was standing just inside the door. He nodded and smiled. Plover was at his desk. He looked up and sucked in some air.

“It wasn’t part of the deal, but I thought I’d bring Andy with me,” I said to Plover. “Actually, it was his idea. He wanted to talk to you.”

“Arrest him!” Plover said to his security.

“Whoa, wait a minute,” I said. “He’s unarmed, and he hasn’t committed a crime.”