Once they reached the hospital and were left to sit in the emergency waiting room together, Jessica began to talk, and once she started, she didn’t seem able to stop.
“We should have been honest, from the beginning. We should have told everyone we were seeing each other again. But we’d both been through a lot, you know? We’d been in love before and it hadn’t ended well, so we both wanted to make sure things would last between us, you know? And what if it didn’t work out but we were still trying to work together at the club? It would have been so much worse if everyone knew we’d been seeing each other. It all started a long time ago, really. I was the one who started flirting first. I know you knew him, but I wonder if you ever really knew him, though. He was so kind, so sweet. He knew all along that he was going to enlist, though. We used to talk about it a lot. He didn’t believe the US should police the world, but he also didn’t believe that people have a right to attack us or anyone who has different beliefs. The first time he killed someone he was horrified. I mean, he was meant to be a musician, not a war machine. But he felt he owed this country. He wanted to do his duty. And he didn’t want us getting too serious and telling our parents until he got back, because what if he didn’t make it back? And then he did make it home, but things were different. He was different. So we took it slow—I took it slow, anyway. He was a lot more certain about how he felt—but things were going okay. He was getting to know Craig, and I was starting to hope we... And then he...he was...”
She trailed off, clearly unwilling to talk about Arnie’s death.
“Jessica, did anyone at La Porte Rouge know your child was Arnie’s child, too?” Danni asked.
Jessica shook her head. “No,” she said softly. She looked at Danni, her eyes tear-filled. “No, we weren’t going to tell anyone until we were certain we were going to stay together. Even our families didn’t know. Well, I’m pretty sure my mom guessed...”
She began to sob softly. Danni held her and patted her, soothing her as best she could. “So you never told your families?” she asked. “Not even when you were first seeing each other years ago?”
“We were afraid.”
“Why?”
“Because of the race issue.”
“In New Orleans?” Danni asked. “Jessica, half the people I know are some mix of white and black.”
“It’s—it’s getting easier,” Jessica said. “But it’s still hard. Oh, everyone tells you it doesn’t matter to them what color someone is. But then you do it, you tell people, and they look at you funny, like they just figured out it kinda does bother them after all. I didn’t care as much as Arnie did, though. He was worried.”
“His parents are the nicest people in the world.”
Jessica nodded. “Yes, they’re wonderful,” she said in a whisper. “And we were talking about telling them. About introducing them to Craig. Craig was Arnie’s grandfather’s name, and Arnie admired him so much...” She stopped speaking and winced, and then tears welled in her eyes again. “Then Arnie died. And I wanted the world to know that it was a lie, that he wasn’t on drugs and that he would never have committed suicide. But if I said anything, then everyone would know, and, well...I’m embarrassed to admit it, but I was afraid. Afraid of being judged. Afraid no one would believe me about Arnie, anyway, so I wouldn’t have done any good at all.” She straightened, as if forcing herself to act braver than she really felt. “So I kept my son away from everyone associated with Arnie. I was so afraid for him, because what if the person who killed Arnie came after him? What about Craig, Danni? Is he in danger now? And my mom. Danni, I did this to my mom. Oh my God, she could be dying!”
“Your mother is going to be okay,” Danni promised her, silently praying she was telling the truth. She pulled Jessica close again, looking over the younger woman’s shoulder.
They were safe, at least for the moment. Larue had seen to it that two officers were on duty at the hospital. Right now one stood at the door to the ER, while the other sat nearby in the waiting room, watching over them. There was, of course, hospital security, as well.
“It’s going to be okay,” Danni assured her. “Just think of what this will mean to Arnie’s family.”
Jessica straightened and stared at her, frowning. “What do you mean?”
“They have you now, and Arnie’s child. They’ll love you and your son.”
Jessica looked at her doubtfully. “Are—are you sure?” she asked.
“Of course! Jessica, he’s a beautiful boy. He’ll be a ray of hope for them. You can never trade a life for a life, but they’ll be so happy that Arnie left a legacy, his little boy.”
“You—you don’t think they’ll see me as some lowlife who was just playing with their son?”
“No!”
This time Danni knew she was telling the truth. Earlier in the day, when they’d all run into one another at the cemetery, Amy had liked Jessica just fine.
It was Sharon she hadn’t trusted.