He stopped in the hallway and pushed open Shaun’s ajar door. Shaun lay on his side, his light hair sticking up against his pillow. Evan walked into the room and knelt beside the bed, held the soft fingers poking from beneath the quilt.
“I won’t ever let you get cold again,” he whispered. “You’re all I have left. I know I haven’t said this before, I don’t know why, but Mom didn’t want to leave us, honey. She tried, she tried really hard to stay, but she couldn’t, and I couldn’t do anything to help.” His voice shook. He didn’t understand where the wellspring came from, only knowing he couldn’t stanch it. “I wish we could all be together again, and that this had never happened to you.” He traced a finger down the pale scar on Shaun’s head. “I dream about it sometimes, our life without everything that happened. Someday we’ll be whole again, I promise.”
He stroked Shaun’s hair one last time and stood, hearing the slight creak of his knees. “Good night, son.”
Evan slipped out of the room, closing the door only a little, and got ready for bed. It was early in the morning when sleep took him, and the last coherent words that he thought while drifting off were tomorrow will be better.
17
Dawn was like something out of a vacation pamphlet.
Sunlight streamed across the lake, coloring the water with shining blazes that hurt the eye when directly looked at. The air held a humid quality that spoke of summer heat, the kind that drove people to the beach and drink beverages from coolers packed to the top with melting ice. The foliage became greener, more alive after the gray of the day before. Evan soaked it all in, his spirits lifting despite waking in a cold sweat that morning.
He didn’t remember the dream, only the terror. He came awake to his heart thudding like a dual bass of the metal bands he used to listen to in high school and his legs rubbery, as if he’d run a long distance with something chasing him only a few steps behind. But the morning stripped the feeling away almost at once. After a cup of coffee taken on the porch, the strength returned to his legs, and by his second cup, with Shaun stirring in the other room, he felt completely normal.
As he helped Shaun get dressed, he grasped the boy by his shoulders and peered into his upturned face.
“How about we go fishing again today?”
Shaun grinned but gave him a querying look.
“Fishing, like we did the other day.”
His mood dimmed a little when Shaun motioned to the TV in the living room.
“No, not TV. Lake—we’re going to go out on the pontoon.”
“Pun,” Shaun said, raising his arms so Evan could carry him.
“How about boat?”
“Boat!”
“That’s good, buddy. Boat, we’ll go out in the boat today.”
Evan took Shaun to his chair at the table, now washed down from the sand and dirt that had clung to its feet from the night before, and began to make breakfast. As the eggs sizzled in the pan, his attention kept returning to his phone. After dishing up his and Shaun’s plates, he finally gave in and dialed Selena’s number, amused that he now had it memorized. She answered on the second ring.
“Good morning.”
Her voice sounded bright as the sunshine outside, and he smiled, a flutter like a trapped bird tickling his stomach.
“I wasn’t sure you’d answer after the wonderful time you had yesterday.”
She laughed. “That was nothing compared to my Monday.”
“Good, I hope you weren’t too put off.”
“By an old, creepy house? No, not at all. You should hear the things that people tell me on a day-to-day basis, some of it would make you cringe.”
“I bet.”
“So is that the only reason you’re calling me this morning? To see if I had a good time yesterday?”
Evan chuckled and moved Shaun’s plate closer to him.
“Actually, Shaun and I were going to go fishing, and I thought you might like to come. Maybe bring back some memories?”
The line grew quiet, and Evan sat, his spirits falling.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to overstep my bounds.”
“No, it’s not that at all, I’d love to come. It just caught me off guard, that’s all. It’s the anniversary of my dad’s passing.”
“Oh God, I’m so sorry, I didn’t—”
“It’s okay, you didn’t know. It’s weird that you asked today, that’s all. But I can’t really think of any better way to spend the day. I always take it off, so I’m free.”
“You’re sure? You don’t have to.”
“No, I’ll be out within an hour. Fishing’s always better in the mornings, you know.”
Evan smiled. The girl knew her stuff. “We’ll see you soon.”
“Bye.”
“Bye.”
He set the phone down and helped Shaun with a large bite of egg.
“Selena’s going to come with us. Is that okay?”
Shaun chewed and stared at him with large eyes that almost always seemed to ask a question. How much did he understand?
Evan scooped up another bite of egg, and Shaun coughed, his eyes widening as he opened his mouth and made a gagging sound.
“Shit, are you okay?” Evan said, leaping to his feet.
All at once the kitchen was too hot, cloying and close. Shaun struggled in his chair and gagged again, spewing out the chewed eggs in a gelatinous clump that fell onto his pants legs.
Terror gripped Evan and he became immobilized by it, crushed in a palm that showed him a future alone, with two graves to visit instead of one.
“Shaun!”
He broke free of the paralysis and unbuckled the chair’s straps. Shaun coughed again, a strained, ragged sound that came from deep in his stomach.
Out of air, he’s out of air!