I am so grateful to Libba Bray for her belief in me, her inspiration, and her guidance, and I am beyond honored to have the words of an author I admire so much on my book cover. I am still pinching myself that she liked this book.
I am floored by the generosity of Courtney Summers, who was there for me at so many moments during the writing of these drafts, and whose advice and support helped me make it to this point. I only hope I can do the same for her.
Thank you, Penguin and Dystel & Goderich Literary Management, for all you’ve done for my books. I’ve been honored to be able to work with such dedicated, passionate people, including Liza Kaplan, Lauren Abramo, Steve Meltzer, Rosanne Lauer, Elizabeth Zajac, Anna Jarzab, Emilie Bandy, Marie Kent, Danielle Delaney, and each and every person who touched my books in one way or another. As someone who used to work in publishing, I know how easy it is to feel unappreciated and crushed under the deadlines, and I hope they know that this author is astoundingly grateful.
I am also ever thankful for the support from the fellow writers in my life, and especially want to mention those who made an impact while I was writing this particular book: David Adjmi, Tara Altebrando, Jo?lle Anthony, Bryan Bliss, Rachel Cantor, Cat Clarke, Camille DeAngelis, Gordon Dahlquist, Gayle Forman, Adele Griffin, Michelle Hodkin, Stephanie Kuehnert, Nina LaCour, Molly O’Neill, Sigrid Nunez, Laurel Snyder, Cheryl Lu-Lien Tan, McCormick Templeman, Lorin Wertheimer, and Christine Lee Zilka. And last but absolutely not least, Micol Ostow, who has been such a huge support to me, since before I even found YA fiction, that I will endlessly thank her in every set of book acknowledgments I write. Thank you also to my extended family and other mothers, especially Ethel Wesdorp, for her enthusiasm and willingness to go to so many of my book events.
And to my blog readers at distraction99.com: Your support over the years as I went from a struggling writer of literary fiction for adults to finding my place here as a YA author has meant the world to me.
Thank you for reading and cheering me on along the way.
My family is small, but so very supportive. My brother, Joshua Suma, never wavers in his belief in me.
And my sister, Laurel Rose Purdy, has been there for me through every low point, and to celebrate every high point, and I can’t imagine my life without her.
My mom, Arlene Seymour, went above and beyond when it came to this manuscript. Due to her own work with MICA (mentally ill and chemically dependent) clients at her clinic, as well as with schizophrenics using art therapy, she became an essential resource during the writing and research of this novel. She was beyond generous with her time and attention in reading this book, and helped steer me in the right direction when it came to writing from Lauren’s perspective.
My mom is a true inspiration to me, a phenomenal woman who I know has changed the lives of many, not to mention her own, when she went back to school when I myself was in college. She was always there for me, while I was a teenager, and through to today.
It’s not an exaggeration to say I would be nowhere without her.
My other half, Erik Ryerson, who I’ve been with since I was eighteen, can surely see parts of himself in Jamie. I don’t want to embarrass him by singing his praises (too much), but he really gave his all for this novel: He is the first reader for every single draft I write, even if that means staying up until five in the morning before one of my deadlines to do so, and it is thanks to his inspiration, his imagination, his sacrifice, and his belief in my writing that this book even exists at all.