“I’m not disagreeing with you!” he yells, and I see red.
“Don’t you dare shout at me, you two-timing bastard! You have no right! I’m entitled to my anger! I’m the one who looks like a goddamn fool in front of the entire world. Not you or that man-stealing whore! So don’t you fucking shout at me.” I slam my fist into the wall, beyond angry at this point. “Ugh.” Dad releases Mom, letting her run toward me. I hold out my hand. “Stay back, Mom. I’m getting this all off my chest, and then Reeve is leaving.”
She stops running, leaning against the wall, concern etched upon her face.
“This isn’t on me,” I continue, in a more even tone. “This is all on you. You've messed up everything, movie star. Your selfish pursuit of your dreams at all cost has destroyed what we once shared.”
“No, Viv. Please don’t say that. We can get through this. I will do whatever you want to make this right. Anything. I’ll do anything, but I can’t lose you. Please, Viv, I’m begging you.” He drops to his knees, clutching my legs and clinging to me.
God, how did we end up here? Both of us destroyed and hurting.
I shake my head, as a wave of sadness washes over me. “You’ve already lost me, Reeve. I might as well be single, because I never see you. I'm lonely, and I’m heartsick, and I can’t do it anymore.”
“Vivien. I love you. I know I’ve fucked up, but please give me another chance.” Easing back, he lifts one knee and removes a box from his pocket. He pops the lid, and I don’t know whether to laugh or cry. “I was planning to ask you to marry me tonight. It’s always been you, Viv. Deep down, you know that. Don’t let her come between us anymore than she already has. I’m begging you. Please forgive me, and say you’ll be my wife.”
This is crazy. Even if things hadn’t blown up today, how could he feel we were in a place where it was right to propose? Our relationship has never been so broken. Hurt infiltrates every nook and cranny of my body, and I wonder if your heart can physically break? Because it feels like mine is. I stare at him through blurry eyes, forcing words out over the anguished lump in my throat. “There was a time I would have jumped into your arms and screamed yes, but we are so far removed from that now.” Sorrow fills my chest as I glance at the stunning princess-cut diamond engagement ring that would be perfect if I wasn’t so devastated by his betrayal. “How could you even consider asking me to marry you when our relationship is in tatters?”
“We’ve lost our way, but we’ll get it back. I’m still committed to you, and this was my way of proving it. I wasn’t expecting us to get married any time soon, but I hoped you would see how much I love you and know I’m still serious about spending the rest of our lives together.”
Just kill me now.
“This is the action of a desperate man. It’s nothing more,” I whisper, drowning in pain and sorrow. “I don’t even understand why you claim to want me anymore.”
“Because I fucking love you!” he yells. “I made a mistake. Lots of them, but my love for you has never wavered. Not once. You’re the other half of my heart and soul, Vivien. Please say you believe that? Please, baby. Please, please, believe me. I can’t lose you. I’ll die without you.”
I clutch the wall behind me, incredulous that he’s stooping to emotional blackmail. My heart is in shreds, and I can’t tolerate much more. Can’t he see that? “I don’t believe it, Reeve,” I croak, sniffling. “I don’t believe a word that comes out of your mouth anymore. I can’t marry you. I won’t marry you, so put that ring away.”
I can’t bear to look at it. It’s the physical representation of all my shattered hopes and dreams. Although the ring is truly stunning, it’s ugly to me because it embodies everything I’ve lost. My heart is obliterated, and I’m amazed it’s still able to beat in my chest.
My anger is fading, replaced with utter devastation and a hopeless sense of inevitability. “Actions speak louder than words, Reeve. And your actions confirm I don’t matter.”
“I’ll put out another statement. I’ll tell the world it was a mistake. I’ll stop taking drugs. I’ll pull out of the movie.” Hysteria filters through his voice as realization dawns. He’s grasping at straws now, throwing everything at it, because he knows he can’t talk his way out of this. Staggering to his feet, he repockets the ring with the saddest look on his face. Seeing it hurts me, but he doesn’t deserve any sympathy, and it’s not my place to console him anymore. My place in his life is dead and buried, and I can’t allow myself to get sucked in any longer.
This must end now.
Even though it’ll kill me to say these words, I know this is the way it has to be. “You have pushed me away, downplayed my feelings, scoffed at my concerns, and let yourself be manipulated. We should have broken up like Audrey and Alex and protected our past because everything is tarnished now. All my memories include you, Reeve. Every single memory I have of my childhood, you are in it, and now they are all tainted!” I cry as heartfelt pain surges through my veins. “She hasn’t just stolen you from me. She’s stolen every good memory. I will never be able to look at our past with anything but pain in my heart.”
“She hasn’t stolen me, Viv. I don’t want her. I only want you.” Resignation is clear in his strained tone. He knows I mean this. That there is no way to come back from this.
“I thought we meant everything to one another. I thought you were the one person I could trust with my life. But you've trampled all over my heart. You have shattered my soul and broken my spirit. I hate who I've become.” I gulp over the painful lump in my throat as I cut myself open and bleed in front of him. “I don't even know who I am anymore. I'm in so much pain, and I'm so lost, and you didn’t even see. You didn’t see or you chose to ignore it.”
He hangs his head, and it’s telling how he’s stopped trying to defend himself.
Exhaustion weighs heavy on my shoulders, and my knees feel like they could buckle. I have reached my breaking point, but I need to get this last bit out, because it’s the first step in starting to properly heal. “What if the roles were reversed and you were the one in my shoes? Have you ever considered that? How hurtful would it be if I were the one parading another man around in public as my boyfriend, shunning you and relegating you to the shadows in case anyone discovered the truth? Being victimized online and attacked when you have done nothing, abso-fucking-lutely nothing, but try to be a supportive partner? How would it feel to watch me kissing another man in public, knowing the entire world is watching and laughing at you for being such a gullible fool to believe I was faithful?”
I wrap my arm around my waist as pain lays siege to my body. “You cheated on me with her.” It all boils down to that. Tears roll down my face again. “You have publicly betrayed me. Slain me as skillfully as if you’d taken a sword and sliced me wide-open.”
Tears cascade down his face too, and his shoulders are slumped as he stares dejectedly at me.
“It’s time I put myself first,” I say, straightening up. “I need to protect my heart and my sanity, and you’re just not good for my health. I can’t be with you anymore.”
“No, baby.” He takes a step toward me, but I shake my head, warning him to stay back. “Please, Viv. Please give me one more chance.”
“You’re all out of chances, Reeve. I don’t want to be with you. I don’t want to see you or speak to you. I want you out of my life,” I add, sobbing. This shouldn’t be so hard. He cheated on me in front of the world. Cutting all ties shouldn’t feel like it’s killing me, but it does.
“I think it’s time for you to go, Reeve.” Mom steps up, pulling me into her arms. I cry into her chest, clinging to her like I used to do when I was a little girl and I’d skinned my knee, needing the comfort only a mother can give.