“I’m the unreasonable bloody idiot? Are you sure that’s not you? Since…I don’t know. You are the one who put their fucking hands on her. On the one person that I’ve ever called mine. Let’s break down the fucking reason, shall we? What was it, exactly? Jealousy? Or maybe it’s your constant need to feel something after your secondary school crush broke your heart and stomped all over it as if it were mere rubbish? Is it because the only person you wanted never wanted you back, and that made you develop a phobia of blondes you still struggle with even as an adult?”
He stops backing away, his shoulders turning tense and his features gradually shutting down. The agreeable mask he wears for everyone slowly disappears, allowing his true image to show.
The raging, bitter fucker who also hates himself. That’s the one thing we had in common when we got close, and no matter how much he’s hid that fact, it’s still a huge part of who he is.
“Shut the fuck up, Knox.” There’s a warning in his clipped tone.
Bloody fantastic. Now, we’re getting down to business.
“It hurts, doesn’t it? Being hit upside the head by the truth. Being reminded that you can have any woman except the one you really want, because she only ever used you, right? You were nothing to her and always will be.”
His fists clench at his sides and I expect him to punch me. I’m waiting for him to make the first move so I can pummel him to the ground. However, his lips curve, and the holes in his cheeks appear grotesque as he smirks. “Just like you’re nothing to Anastasia, you mean? She threw you away the first chance she got. And guess who she chose? Moi.”
I lunge at him and he’s waiting with a raised fist. I punch him first and he punches back just as hard. I might’ve been the one who was working out on the bag, but his hits are fueled with as much adrenaline as mine.
It’s like he’s waited for this moment to release all the pent-up energy that’s been growing inside him as well.
I tackle him to the ground, but before I can pin him down, he rolls us around and kicks me in the balls.
“Motherfucker!” I curse, grabbing the throbbing area and stare up at him, because he’s standing, panting, his eyes shadowed. “That’s a fucking low blow.”
“Just like bringing her up. Do that again and your dick will be next.”
“Not if I kill you first.”
“You can try. Doesn’t mean you’ll succeed.”
I crawl to a sitting position, wincing at the pain in my balls. The fucking bastard got me good.
As much as I want to rearrange his features and sell them for parts, I know he meant it about my dick. He can be a raging arsehole when provoked and I definitely did that by mentioning his Achilles’ heel.
So unless I break his dick first, he’ll come after mine.
Besides, it’s like all the destructive energy I stored inside is slowly deflating. All I’m left with is a bitter taste at the back of my fucking throat.
I stare up at him—or, more accurately, glare. “Just tell me why, Daniel. Why her?”
“No reason.”
“Either you tell me or I swear to fuck I’m going to find the blonde from your past and fuck her, then send you the pictures.” I wouldn’t, because that would mean touching another woman besides Anastasia, and as much as I want to strangle the fuck out of her, I don’t want any other woman but her.
However, my words get me the intended reaction. He grabs me by the shirt and hauls me off the ground. “Don’t you fucking dare.”
“Why? I thought you were over her, or is that another lie?”
“I’m going to fuck up your life, Knox.”
“You do that while I’m busy fucking her into oblivion.”
“Shut the fuck up or I’ll fuck Anastasia for real.”
I’m about to punch him to death when his words register. He said for real, as in, it didn’t happen.
“You didn’t do anything with her, did you?” I ask slowly, the haze dissipating from my vision.
“I will in about half an hour if you don’t stop being a dick.”
“Like fuck you will.” I stand to my full height and push him away. “Why did you make me believe something happened?”
“I didn’t make you believe something happened. You painted that whole scenario yourself. I specifically told you I didn’t come on to her, but you weren’t listening.”
“Why did she say she came on to you?”
“Hello? She obviously realized I’m a catch.”
“Daniel,” I warn.
“Why don’t you ask her?”
“Well, I’m asking you.”
“Even if I knew something, why would I spill the beans? You get fewer brownie points for being a bloody fucking wanker. Not only did you believe I would do such a thing to you, but you also brought her up. We agreed to never fucking do that.”
“What did you expect me to do? You were lying to me.”
“I was cooperating for your bloody sake, but fuck you.”
“My sake? What is that supposed to mean?”
“She said she’s doing this for you.”
“For me?”
“That’s all I’m telling you. You’ll have to find out everything else from her.”
It still feels wrong that she even went to him instead of coming to me and I want to punch him to death for that reason alone, but I suck in deep breaths to conjure some much-needed calm.
Anastasia has a lot to answer to, and a lot to learn, like the fact that she can’t take any other man’s side but mine. Or tell me it’s over.
She can do whatever the fuck she wants, but only while she’s with me.
“Where did you see her last?” I ask Daniel.
“At the firm, but I wouldn’t look there or at her flat.”
“Why the fuck not?”
He sighs, long and deep. “Because she said she’s going back to where she came from.”
34
ANASTASIA
When I left my father’s house two months ago, I never thought I’d ever come back.
At least, not alive.
But here I am. In front of the black metal gate, waiting for the guards to open it. I don’t have to wonder whether or not they spotted me since countless cameras and drones survey the mansion.
If someone is stupid enough to consider intruding on the Pakhan’s house, they’ll have machine guns at their temples before they can blink.
The guards recruited to specifically protect the Pakhan don’t only rely on technology, though. They own countless weapons, some smuggled from Russia, and others from the merchandise they’ve acquired from arms dealers.
I’ve just seen the weapons vault once, and only because I was passing by when they were loading new guns in it. That thing resembled an army’s arsenal waiting to wage war.
Needless to say, I never went near it again.
Like Little Miss Ostrich, I pretended none of it mattered and I had nothing to do with it. Until I couldn’t keep up the fa?ade anymore and I had to leave.
But now, I’m back.
Now, I’m sitting in front of the huge gate, staring at the blinking cameras. The guards must’ve seen me by now and told my father that the daughter who stole from the Bratva and he covered up for is back.
No clue what’s taking them so long. It couldn’t be because they don’t recognize me.
I stripped my hair and bleached it back to its original platinum blonde and I also removed the glasses and the contacts. I even wore a soft pink flowery dress and elegant high heels—the style everyone knows me by.
Just like that, Jane vanished. I snuffed her out as if she never existed.
I left my resignation letter with HR and two different letters to Gwen and Chris, apologizing for not being truthful about who I truly am and telling them that it’s better if they forget they ever met me.
Neither of them were supposed to happen in my new life, but they did, and for the first time, I realize that I’m capable of having friends.
It hurt to leave them, but it’s for their sake.
It’s for the best.
I’m back where I always belonged and foolishly thought I could leave.
And the worst part is, this isn’t the only thing I was so foolish about.
There’s also the belief that I could have a normal relationship.
My chest aches at the reminder of him, Knox, the man who showed me the world, but I left him with a bitter betrayal.
It’s been a day since he caught me with Daniel and left with that angry frown I wish I could erase. Only one day, but it feels like an eternity, like I haven’t seen him in forever.
The fact that he thinks so little of me adds insult to injury, but hopefully, with time, when he realizes why I’m doing this, he’ll understand.
The key word being hopefully.