No, I can’t afford to think about any of that shit right now.
I make an effort to lighten my grip on the steering wheel. She’s mine, at least for the time being. I have to keep my promise to ensure she’s safe, which means focusing on the next few steps instead of what could have happened. “Where are we headed?”
“We have an interview.” She glances at her phone. “And then we’re going to speak with my mother.”
Demeter.
Another powerful, dangerous woman who’s only too happy to use her children as pawns in the Olympian power games. Yes, I have some things to say to Demeter. “Okay.”
“Eros.” Psyche reaches out almost hesitantly and touches my arm. “I need your head in the game. Are you with me?”
“Yes.” It’s even true. I’ve been compartmentalizing since I was a child. It’s nothing new. My end goal hasn’t changed, though now it’s expanded to ensure that Zeus never touches Psyche. I can’t tell her that, though. She’ll say that I’m being irrational, that it’s a moot point because our marriage has ensured he never will.
I don’t care. I have no right to this jealousy, especially when Psyche is mine in every way that counts, but that doesn’t stop me from wanting to brand my presence on her very skin. The more time I spend with her, the harder it is to control my baser urges. I feel like I have a monster inside me, rattling the cage of my control. Eventually it will break out, and then there will be a price to pay.
“Eros.” She’s quiet for several blocks before she takes what sounds like a fortifying breath. “It doesn’t matter what I would have done if my mother reached her goals. It didn’t happen. I married you, not Zeus. I am your wife, not his. I’m committed to seeing this through, so please stop thinking whatever is going through your head right now. We need Zeus’s support, and these circumstances have already ensured that it’s going to be nearly impossible to pull that off.”
I’m committed to seeing this through.
I know she’s talking about what is essentially our con. Marriage for as long as it takes to keep her and her family safe from my mother. She’s not talking about forever.
But just for a moment, I really wish she were.
I’m not a dreamer by nature. I like facts and reality rather than the fantastic version of what could be. The fact is that Psyche only said yes at that altar because I forced her to. She didn’t choose me; she never would have chosen me if given her freedom.
It doesn’t matter. I won’t let it matter. I’ve already decided to keep her, and now all that’s left is paving that path forward between us. I want Psyche in my bed forever. I want the possibility of years spinning out between us, of new schemes and games and playing the public of Olympus to our whims.
I want…children.
The thought staggers me. It’s not something I’ve put much consideration into. My father isn’t around—Aphrodite doesn’t allow for any competition, even in parenting—and my mother is hardly a perfect specimen of what good child-rearing looks like. Up until this point, I’ve always taken for granted that our line would end with me.
Not any longer.
I cover Psyche’s hand with mine and give her a little squeeze. “My head is where it should be. We’ll see this through.”
And after?
After, I’ll convince her that forever could be ours.
28
Psyche
The interview is a nice distraction. It’s so normal in the midst of a situation that’s anything but. Eros manages to pull himself together enough to be charming, but I know him well enough now to recognize that he’s a little off. It’s a disconcerting realization, both that what happened with Zeus was enough to throw him off his game and that I can see the signs.
As agreed, Clio keeps to the subjects we outlined when I set this up. It’s mostly softball questions about how we met and the wedding itself. A fair exchange for being the first to break with an interview. Most of the time, Olympus cares less about the real story than about whatever spin they want to put on things, but Clio isn’t too bad for a reporter. I’ve known her since before she got her most recent promotion, and we’ve helped each other out countless times over the years.
She’s a curvy Black woman with an impeccable style. Today she’s wearing loose pleated gray trousers and a sleeveless cream blouse that does wonders for her silhouette. If I’m not mistaken, I recognize Juliette’s work. It seems she took my advice to try the designer out. Good.
Clio might be on the gossip circuit right now, but she’s hungry for deeper stories than her column can provide. She’s also smart enough to realize that she can’t go chasing down those leads without the Thirteen turning on her. Not yet, anyway.
That doesn’t stop her from collecting any and all information that comes her way, mining for a gold nugget in the midst of so much mud. I hope I have one for her today.
We wrap things up quickly, and I press a soft kiss to Eros’s lips. “Do you mind waiting outside for a moment?”
He hesitates, but there’s nothing to argue about. We’re in my mother’s building, and there are no windows in this boardroom. Clio is hardly an assassin; she wouldn’t have many stories if she killed off her sources, and she’s too ambitious to throw her future away for the chance Aphrodite might protect her. Eros seems to realize that and finally nods. “Don’t be long, love.”
“Wouldn’t dream of it.”
We watch him walk out, and Clio whistles the second the door closes. “Bold choice, Psyche.”
“You have no idea.” I manage not to blush, but it’s a near thing. Clio isn’t a friend and likely never will be, but we’re aligned in a number of ways. “I have a tip for you.”
She tilts her head to the side, her long black braids sliding over her shoulder. “Does this have to do with the real reason you went from avoiding Eros like the plague to having that giant diamond on your finger?”
“No.” I won’t break our cover, not even for Clio. Especially not for Clio. “This has to do with a feud between Aphrodite and Demeter.”
“Old news.” Clio waves that away. “They’ve been at each other’s throats for years. There’s nothing worth digging for there.”
“You’d be surprised.”
She raises her brows. “Okay, I’m intrigued. Surprise me.”
“Aphrodite is so furious that her son married Demeter’s daughter, she’s taken out a hit.”
Clio blinks. “That’s quite the allegation. Do you have any proof?”
Not that I’m willing to share. Not enough. I give her a sardonic smile. “Since when do the gossip columns need proof?”
“Fair point.” Her gaze goes distant, and I can already see how her impressive brain is considering the spin on this. “I’ll need more in order to post anything. Aphrodite is a bitch and a half, and she won’t hesitate to call for my job and slap me with a libel suit. Hearsay, even from you, isn’t enough to take that risk.”
I figured as much. I glance at the door. “There was a disturbance in Helen Kasios’s building last night. Ares’s people were called in to take custody of the assassin. They still have him.”
Clio laughs softly. “Well, that I can work with. I can’t promise to work fast, because I’ll need to verify everything, but I’ll ask some questions.” She starts to gather up her purse. “Can I assume I’ll get a call if there are any more disturbances that she might be connected to?”
“Yes, as long as you promise to give me a heads-up before you run the story.”
“You have yourself a deal.”
We shake on it. Eros is waiting in the hallway, and we head to the elevator while Clio strides out the front doors, an intense look on her face. Eros glances at me. “Do I want to know what you talked about?”
“Zeus wants things quieted down, but he won’t take our word for it or step in unless we force his hand. Utilizing Clio is one way to go about it.”