“God, no.” Winter shook her head. “But he had to put your uniqueness in a good light. No one dared to challenge him. Everyone knew what happened when you went up against his family. So they accepted it, and you were treated like a normal wolf shifter.”
“If by normal you mean insulted and put down at every opportunity he had, then sure.” He’d treated me so poorly my entire life, and I’d allowed it. At least the cycle was finally ending even if I had to forfeit my life.
“I’m sorry. I had no clue.” She exhaled. “It was a few nights before the mating ceremony, and I knew I had to get out of there. He’d kept my room heavily guarded, but he was going out of town and pulled a few men off my room. I knew it was my one and only chance to escape.”
I couldn’t fault her for that. I’d never want to mate with someone like Tyler. Once you sealed the bond, it was done. Even if you found your fated mate only death could sever it. That was why shifters had to be sure they were okay with mating before committing to each other.
“I waited until he’d left the premises.” Her eyes filled with pain. “It took longer than normal, which should’ve been my first clue.”
“You already told me this part.” I didn’t need to hear it again. “You ran into the maid, and she told you I’d died and Tyler had taken off with me. But why didn’t you check before you left? That’s what I want to know.” I tried to hide the pain from my voice, but it leaked through.
“Because I thought he’d figured out you weren’t his and that he’d kill me.” She cast her eyes to the ground, looking ashamed. “My survival instincts kicked in, and I ran. When I saw you a week ago, I knew I’d made the biggest mistake of my life.”
“At least, you’re honest.” She’d assumed I’d died so she could move on and live. It wasn’t a pretty truth, but it was true. There wasn’t the smell of a lie, and her pain seemed genuine. Somehow, that made it worse.
“Does that mean we can build a relationship?” she asked with so much damn hope.
“I’m not sure what you mean.” If she was expecting us to hold hands and skip in the sunshine, that was a hard no. “But I’m open to working together to protect your pack, my pack, and my friends.” I hadn’t wanted to collaborate with them before. I wasn’t thrilled about it now, but surviving was a big deal.
“We can get to know each other, right?”
“I’m not ready for that.” I hated this whole situation, and everything I came into contact with turned out messy. What had I ever done to make fate hate me so?
Donovan linked with me, feeling the turmoil through our bond. Are you okay?
Define okay?
“I get that it will take time …” she pushed.
I need you. I got that she wanted to find redemption, forgiveness, or, hell, maybe even peace, but I wasn’t in the right place for that.
I’m on my way.
“Look, we had the talk you wanted.” I waved my hand between us. “And our packs need to work together, but that’s all I can commit to.” I was barely holding it together. My biological father was dead. His side of the family knew nothing about me—but even if they did, they’d want me dead—my mother had abandoned me, and Tyler had treated me worse than scum.
“No, I get that, but I was hoping—”
The back door opened, cutting her off, and I almost cried when Donovan stepped outside. His blue eyes darkened with concern, and his dark hair was messy. His presence already provided some comfort.
Winter glared, unhappy with the interruption.
Unfazed, he walked over to me and wrapped an arm around my waist. “How’s everyone doing out here?”
“We are in the middle of a conversation.”
“Actually, we are done.” I met her gaze directly. I’d dealt with as much as I was willing to and needed time to figure out my feelings. “But thank you for your honesty.”
She pouted. “But Titan isn’t out here.”
“I’m sure you can find him in the library.” Donovan stood strong beside me. “They probably need extra help. I’m thinking after what Sadie went through, a nap would do her good.”
In our brief time together, he already knew how I worked. “I am exhausted.” Really, I wanted to be alone and not be afraid to fall apart.
He opened the door. “There’s no time like the present.”
I entered the kitchen, and Winter followed behind.
“Hey.” Katherine pulled out a bag of blood from the refrigerator. “Titan asked me to come get you and take you to the library.”
“Well, here she is.” The sooner I got some distance, the better. My emotions were all over the place.
“Well, alrighty then.” Katherine smiled.
“Okay, I’ll see you later.” I glanced at Winter and then exited the kitchen, heading to the stairs.
As I passed by the den, Roxy jumped up from the couch where she’d been sitting next to Axel. Her eyes landed on me, and she said over her shoulder to Axel, “I’m going upstairs for a minute.”
“Do I need to go with you?” Axel asked as he followed her gaze.
“Nope, we’re good.” She headed over to me and waved Axel off. “Just kick Luther’s ass in the game.”
She didn’t say anything as the three of us headed upstairs and into Donovan’s and my bedroom. When the door shut behind me, my shoulders sagged as I gave in to my emotions.
“Hey, are you okay?” Roxy pulled me into a hug. “That had to be a hard conversation.”
“I’ll be all right.” I returned her embrace and pulled back, taking Donovan’s hand. The way they supported me meant the world to me. “Especially with the two of you by my side.”
“You know I’ll always have your back.” Her hazel eyes turned a deep brown. “No matter what, you’ll always be my girl.”
“I know.” She had been the one constant. She’d had my back when no one else had. “And I love you.”
“I love you too.”
“What the hell, man!” Axel yelled from downstairs. “You’re cheating.”
“It’s not cheating when someone is better than you,” the normally quiet vampire shot back.
“Okay, I better get back down there.” She rolled her eyes. “Boys and their games.” She pointed at Donovan. “Am I good leaving my girl in your care?”
“I’ll always take care of her,” Donovan promised in a low, raspy voice that warmed my body.
“Good.” She gave me another quick hug and walked out the door, shutting it behind her.
“Come here.” Donovan climbed into bed and opened his arms wide.
I happily obliged and nestled my head into his chest, listening to his heartbeat. I closed my eyes, trying to melt into his embrace and find comfort in his arms, but something nagged at my brain that I couldn’t ignore.
Chapter Thirteen
“Do you think I’m being too hard on her?” I wasn’t willing to open up to Winter yet, but I needed to know if I was acting like a completely unjustified ass.
“Who?” Donovan’s fingertips brushed my arm as he chuckled. “Winter?”
I smacked him on the arm gently. “Yes. Who else would I be talking about?”
“In all fairness, you’re super hard on yourself.” Donovan pulled me closer to him. “But to answer your question, no, you aren’t being too hard on her.”
“Then, why do I feel like I am?” I’d always wanted to know my mother. I’d dreamed of her so many times growing up. I’d imagined her coming to me and taking me away from Tyler. Wasn’t that what mothers were supposed to do? Protect their children at all costs? She hadn’t done any of that for me.
“Because you grew up thinking she was dead.” He kissed my forehead. “And then you found out what happened, which was almost worse. She was alive and left you behind even if it was unintentional.”
When he put it like that, my anger, my hesitancy, and even my longing made more sense. However, the first two feelings were the strongest, which made me even angrier for wanting to know her more. Blood didn’t create a family. I had to remind myself of that.
“What do I do?” I didn’t know how to move forward. How did you overcome something like that? Inside, my feelings lay shattered.
“You discover yourself first.”
It sounded so simple. And the truth behind it rocked me to my core.