“I don’t want to be the reason you’re fighting with your parents, I know you hate that. I will completely understand if it’s too much and you don’t think I’m worth the trouble.” The blood drained from my face. What the heck was he saying?
He reached over and took my hand.
“I don’t want to, believe me, but I don’t want you to fall out with them. If you wanted to just be friends again. If it’s too much, then we can. It would hurt like hell and suck so bad, but I just want you to be happy.”
I felt sick, actually sick. He really had no clue just how much he meant to me.
“So, do you still want to be together?” he asked quietly. He had never looked so vulnerable or scared before. I squeezed his hand and nodded my head, which made him relax.
“Okay, good. I was really scared you’d want to, and I’d have to pretend like it wasn’t killing me every time I saw you.” I tried to control the tears that were seriously threatening to spill over.
“Don’t cry! God, you’re such a girl,” he said teasingly, making me smile. “Oh, just so you know, that offer was forever. Since you said you don’t want to go back to being friends you no longer hold the right to.” He laughed. “And yeah, I’m aware of how much of a psycho I sounded just then!”
We pulled up outside my house, and I sagged into the seat. Going home always dampened my mood. The front door flew open before Cole had even turned the engine off. Mum ran towards us with Dad just behind her. Cole’s parents also saw us arrive as they both came out of his house. Mia and Jasper were nowhere to be seen, probably choosing to stay away from the drama.
Cole jumped out and walked around to my side. I got out of the car and stood beside him. I relaxed a little as I felt Cole’s his hand rest on the small of my back.
“I’m so sorry,” Mum mumbled and pulled me into a long hug. Her body shook with tears. After a few seconds, I hugged her back. She loves you. She just wants the best for you.
When she let me go, Dad wrapped his arms around me. I let him and hugged him back but forced up an emotional barrier in my mind. Having him touch me made me feel nauseous but I couldn’t not do it, or it would look odd.
“I’m sorry too, sweetheart. And to you, Cole.” He released me, and I backed up straight away. “Let’s go in. We all need to talk.”
Everyone followed behind Dad. They all seemed to do whatever he said without question.
I sat down next to Cole on the sofa and pressed against his side.
“Calm down and breathe,” Cole whispered as Mum put down a tray of tea, coffee, hot chocolate and biscuits. I took a deep breath. My lungs burned from holding my breath.
Dad cleared his throat and sat forward in the chair.
“Yesterday, everything got out of hand, and we all said some things that we didn’t mean. I didn’t think this would happen yet. Not until you were older, Oakley.” I almost choked in disbelief. How could he even sit there and pretend my age mattered? I felt sick to my stomach.
Mum reached across from the sofa beside ours and grabbed my hand. “I need you to understand that as your mother, of course I want you to talk again, but it isn’t everything. I don’t love you any less. Nothing could make me love you any less.”
I can think of one thing, I thought bitterly, holding in the tears that threatened to burst out.
“I’m sorry for what I said, but you have to understand that you will always be my little girl, no matter what. However, I really am happy for you both. Just make sure you look after her,” Mum added.
He smiled and threw his arm over the back of the sofa.
“Always.”
We all sat around talking for a while, and drinking our hot drinks. I didn’t dare look at Dad again. I hated him so much, but I still loved him. I wanted to him to go to prison, but I wanted him to stay and change back to how he was. I wanted him to be my dad again. I hadn’t seen Frank in almost three years so I knew it was over but I didn’t understand why things couldn’t be the way they were when I was a child. Well I did know why but I desperately wanted to be carefree and have a happy family again. God I was so messed up.
After Cole left, and had arranged to come back for dinner, I sat in my room with Mum. She had apologised a million times for what happened and was trying to think of ways she could make it up to me.
“Oh, what about a spa day? That would be lovely,” she suggested.
I did like the spa in Italy. I nodded. She was making an effort. I could do the same.
She lay back against my hard wooden headboard and smiled like a teenage girl.
“So, how are things going with Cole? You two do make a lovely couple, I’ve always thought that.” I know you have, so why the freak out? Because knowing we were together forced her to realise she still saw me as a child?
I bit my lip, feeling the heat rise to my cheeks.
“It’s so good to see you happy, love.”
It was good to feel happy.
Chapter Sixteen
Cole