I rubbed stretchmark cream over my bump and pulled my pyjama top down. So far the cream was working, but that might just be because the baby was small, and I still had two months of stretching to do yet.
A Happy Valentine’s Day card – tragically from my Mum – sat on my dresser, laughing at me. The only proper card I’d got before was one from my ex, but that was years ago. Not that I expected to get one. Who would be lusting after a pregnant hippo!
Picking up my phone, I dialled Jasper’s number for his routinely morning we’re-fine call. “Morning,” he said. “You got anything in for breakfast or want me to pick something up?
“What?” I said. “You’re here? I thought I you were coming next weekend.”
“Changed my mind. That okay?”
“Yeah. Where are you?”
“Just coming through town. Be there in five. Food?” God I need to get dressed!
“Can you pick something up?”
“Bagels? I’m almost outside that deli place.”
“Egg and bacon please.”
“See you in a few.”
I hung up the phone and pulled my wardrobe open, scanning my maternity tops. Thank heavens for leggings; they were a pregnant woman’s best friend.
Just as I’d finished putting some mascara on, there was a knock on the door. I fluffed my hair and tried to stop smiling quite so broadly before I let Jasper in.
Leaning casually against the doorframe in a pair of ripped jeans, grey t-shirt and black leather jacket, he took my breath away.
“Hey,” he said, giving me one of those heart-stopping smiles where his eyes light up.
“Hey, come in.”
From behind his back he pulled out a bunch of red roses and did a little bow.
“For you.”
“Thank you, they’re gorgeous.” It was the first time I’d got roses. My ex bought me a cheesy teddy holding a heart – not that I was ungrateful; I loved it until he broke up with me. “You didn’t have to get me flowers.”
He shrugged. “They were half price from the garage.”
I laughed and rolled my eyes. I could tell they weren’t, they were too large, and there was fancy red-and-white crepe paper around them. I grabbed a vase, filled it with water and popped them in.
He walked past me and grabbed two plastic plates from my wardrobe. He handed me one and sat on the bed with his.
“Thanks, I really needed this. Your child is making me doubly hungry.”
“You’re supposed to be eating for two.”
“Myth,” I said. “But it would be nice.”
As we ate, my eyes wandered to the roses sitting in the vase by the sink. I would have to arrange them properly later. Without even knowing it, he made me feel special and wanted. I held on to the hope that it wouldn’t be too long before he was ready for a relationship again and that he’d want one with me. The image of us together with our baby was one that I clung to. It was the reason that I didn’t give up and just plan for a friendship between us, but I knew I was risking getting hurt.
“How’s everyone back home?”
“Good,” he replied with a full mouth.
“You’re gross, Jasper.”
“Hey, don’t ask my questions until I’ve finished eating and I won’t reply with a-”
“Alright!” I waited until he’d finished, which took about three bites with the amount he shovelled in. “House hunting going okay?”
He shrugged. “It’s alright. Thankfully the flat has enough room for tons of baby stuff so even if I’m still renting when she arrives I’ll have the space for her.”
“And the space for me?” I asked, chewing on my lip. I didn’t want to ask, but I wasn’t comfortable being away from my baby. It was selfish; I knew that, he would have to spend nights away from her, but I couldn’t help it.
“Are you asking to move in with me?”
I elbowed his arm. “No. I’d just feel more comfortable if I was there too.”
He frowned.
“Not because I don’t think you could handle it, please don’t think that. It’s just being away from my newborn makes me feel panicky already. Plus she’ll need my milk. When she’s older you can have her overnight without me but to start with I’d like to be there.”
He nodded slowly. “I understand that feeling. There’s room for three. Always will be.”
I wasn’t sure if that covered forever the way I wanted it to.
“You want to get some more stuff this weekend? I can take it back to your parents for you when I go. You said you wanted one of those vibrating, music playing, all-singing all-dancing chairs.”
“Sounds good to me.”
“Cool. Then I’ll take you out to dinner. It is the card companies day after all.”
“Someone’s bitter.”
“Catching your wife with another man will do that.”
I winced. “Crap. Jasper, I’m sorry, I didn’t think.”
“Forget it. It’s fine.”