I hadn’t expected Juliette and her popular boy fan club to suddenly become my best friends—and they didn’t, of course—but Dylan and Luke both nodded and said hello when they passed me in the halls, and Rob even started sitting by me in the one class we shared and sometimes joined Vivian and me at lunch.
I was still mostly an outcast, but the animosity toward me seemed to be gone, with the exception of Anastasia and her most loyal friends. It made life at school a little more comfortable. Unfortunately, the tension at home got worse. Anastasia hated that Juliette and I were becoming friendlier with one another. The angrier she got, the less Juliette wanted to be around her, and suddenly Ana was the one hiding in her room all the time instead of me.
It was nice having Vivian and Juliette and even Rob to talk to, but I missed Cinder. By Friday night I still hadn’t spoken to him. It had only been three days since our fight, but it felt like forever. I wasn’t sure why I hadn’t contacted him yet. Being stubborn, mostly. I wanted him to be the first to break. Even though he said he cared about me, him not wanting to meet me hurt.
I knew I needed to get over him, so I tried to forget about him and enjoy myself at Vivian’s house. Our movie night was a success. Everyone was relaxed and in a good mood. We stuck to our plan to rent a Brian Oliver flick. Since it was a teen comedy, the guys all liked it, too. There was a lot of laughter and popcorn throwing.
Everything was perfect, except for the fact that I couldn’t make myself like Rob. He was a really nice guy. He was cute, interesting, smart—and I could tell that he really liked me—but there was nothing there for me. I liked him, and would love to have him as a friend, but there were no butterflies when I looked at him. He sat next to me during the movie with his hand resting on his thigh as if he was waiting for me to pick it up or give him any indication that I wanted him to take mine. I cradled the popcorn bowl and pretended to be oblivious.
I managed to hide my misery well enough, because even though I didn’t flirt with Rob he seemed in good spirits when he left Vivian’s house, and Juliette talked about how excited she was for me all the way home.
The following Friday I turned nineteen. I hadn’t said a word to anyone about it, hoping the day would come and go with no one being the wiser. I was dreading it for several reasons. The first—and most obvious—was that it marked the anniversary of my mother’s death. The morning of my eighteenth birthday Mama woke me up with an off-key serenade to the tune of “Happy Birthday,” and announced that she was pulling me out of school for the last two days that week. She was taking me on a weekend ski trip to Vermont. She promised me an expensive dinner and a candle to blow out in the dessert of my choosing once we got to the resort, but I never got to make a wish.
Then, of course, I was also dreading the day this year because of the fact that my father had either forgotten or just ignored my birthdays for the last four or five years. The first time he forgot my birthday, I was eleven. The last time he remembered it I was fourteen. No matter how hard I tried, I never stopped being disappointed each year he forgot, so Mama became determined to help me forget about my father by making the day the most special one of the year for me—no matter what it took.
For years now my birthday had been a big deal. This year would be different. This year there was no one to make sure it was special. I wasn’t even sure if my father knew when it was anymore, and I wasn’t about to ask him. Things were awkward enough between us.
I told myself I could get through the day. I was determined to treat it like any other, but by the time I came out of my room dressed for school I was already so weighed down I felt as if I couldn’t breathe. When I came out into the kitchen and found a bouquet of yellow roses so big it had its own center of gravity sitting on the counter with my name on it, I nearly burst into tears. As I stared at the flowers, a heavy arm fell around my shoulders. “How are you doing this morning?” my dad asked solemnly.
I couldn’t have spoken even if I knew how to express myself. I shrugged beneath the weight of his arm.
My father suddenly crushed me to his chest in a hug that was as much for his sake as it was for mine. For a moment I stood frozen in shock, but I quickly melted against him and squeezed back with everything I had in me.
“Happy birthday, kiddo,” he whispered, his voice thick with emotion.
“I didn’t think you’d remember.”
“I’ve missed enough of your birthdays.”
My dad squeezed me even tighter, and I let him. The seconds began to pass. Neither of us spoke, and neither of us let go. The feel of his arms around me, his concern for me, and the warmth and love in his embrace completely did me in. I buried my face in his chest and let him hold me as I cried.
After a few minutes of ruining my dad’s shirt, I finally pulled back enough to look up at him. His eyes shone with unshed tears as he forced a heartbreaking smile down at me. “I didn’t think you’d want a lot of attention today, so we didn’t plan a party. No surprises, I promise, but I hope you’ll let us take you to a birthday dinner somewhere, at least. You could bring your friend Vivian along too, if you’d like.”
“Can I get back to you on that? I’m not even sure I can make it through the day right now.”
My dad swallowed back a lump in his throat and then nodded when he couldn’t speak.
“Would you like to stay home from school today?”
I jumped at Jennifer’s voice and pulled back from my father as if I’d been caught doing something I shouldn’t. Pain flicked across my dad’s face, but he buried it quickly. He looked at Jennifer and then back at me. “She’s right. If you aren’t up for classes today, you don’t have to go.”
I met my dad’s eyes, then glanced around the kitchen. Jennifer and Juliette were both standing there with small, supportive smiles. I guess the secret was out. They clearly knew this wasn’t just my birthday. Even Anastasia sat at the bar with a subdued expression. Wiping my cheeks dry, I shook my head in answer to my dad and Jennifer’s suggestion. “I think moping around here alone will make it worse.”
“I’m sorry we can’t go visit your mom’s grave. Maybe we could take a trip back to Boston over Thanksgiving break next week, if you’d like that. For now, I could take the day off from work and we could go do something, just the two of us.”
“You don’t have to do that. I think it’ll help if I stay busy. School will be a good distraction.”
My dad looked disappointed again, so I added, “It would be nice to go visit Mama and Abuela and Granpapa sometime, though. It doesn’t have to be Thanksgiving, but whenever there’s a good weekend.”
“I’d like to come with you,” Juliette said.
I looked at her, surprised and touched. She smiled back tentatively. “You could show me around Boston, maybe visit a few of your old friends.” Her smile morphed into a mischievous grin. “I could get them to tell me their best stories about you. A sister needs blackmail material, you know. Even a step one.”
That did it. I laughed. Juliette surprised me even more by giving me a light hug. “Happy birthday.”
“Thanks.” I said, and shyly retuned the hug. “A trip to Boston sounds fun. If we wait until the summer, we can go to Nantucket and I can show you how East Coasters do the beach. And I’ll take you to a Red Sox game at Fenway Park.”
Juliette grinned. “I’ll be sure to wear my Dodgers jersey.”
Dad’s misty eyes bounced back and forth between Juliette and me. “I’ll book a hotel today. We’ll make a whole vacation out of it.”
Anastasia broke up the moment with a sigh just before it could get awkward. I waited for whatever snide remark she had prepared, but all she said was, “Are you guys ready to go? I don’t want to be late.”
. . . . .
When we got to school, Rob was waiting for us in the student parking lot with a single red rose. As I accepted it, he planted a soft kiss on my cheek and whispered, “Happy birthday.”
“Thanks.”
I brought the bud to my nose, wishing it would hide my blush while Rob took my backpack and slung it over his shoulder with his own book bag. As we headed toward the school, he glanced at me. “You weren’t going to tell anyone, were you?”
“I wasn’t. How did you know?”
“I told him.” Juliette rolled her eyes at my frown. “You can’t let what happened last year take over your birthday for the rest of your life. You need some good to help balance out the bad.”
I smelled my rose again and a smile crept over my face. I was surprised at how right Juliette was. “Thanks.”
As the three of us stepped into the main breezeway and merged into the crowd of students, we could tell instantly that something wasn’t normal. There was some kind of buzz in the air. It took me a minute to realize that I was the focus of the excitement. It was the oddest combination of emotions ranging from fascination, to confusion, to utter contempt. People were staring and whispering—some of them excited, others unable to hold in their disgust. As we neared my locker, I started to make out some of the whispers.
“It’s her!”
“I can’t believe she knows him.”
“She’s not that pretty.”
“What does he see in her, anyway?”
I had no idea what was going on. I glanced at a group of younger girls who looked so excited they could barely contain their giddiness. One of them caught my gaze, and that energy finally burst. “Hi, Ella!”
Once the first greeting came, a chorus of others followed it.
“Hey, Ella!”
“Happy birthday, Ella!”
“You are so lucky, Ella!”
“Don’t you just love Brian Oliver, Ella?”
“Happy birthday!”
I glanced at Rob first, but he was just as mystified as me, so I turned to Juliette for an explanation. She threw her hands up in surrender. “Don’t look at me. I only told Rob and Vivian. I have no idea what’s going on.”
It was seriously like we’d left Los Angeles and landed in some alternate dimension. “Brian Oliver? Can I believe what? What’s going on? What is everyone talking about?” I asked, though I knew neither Juliette nor Rob had any answers.
Mitchell Drayton, the most gorgeous guy in school, who also happened to be the snobbiest because he had an agent and had landed a few bit parts on a couple of TV shows, walked right up to us. “Hey, Jules,” he said to Juliette and then turned his devastating smile on me. “Hi, Ella. Are you having a party or anything for your birthday? Need a date?”
Rob stepped a little closer to my side and glared at him. Mitchell glanced at the rose in my hand, and then gave Rob a once-over. He took a step back, chuckling to himself. “Sorry, bro. Didn’t realize I was stepping on anyone’s toes.” To me, he said, “I’m having a party tomorrow night with some of my actor friends. You should come. Bring Rob and Jules too, if you’d like. Eight P.M. Jules knows where I live.”
My mouth hung agape and my heart pounded as I watched him walk away. Every teen movie that was worth anything started out with a scene like this—everyone being unusually nice to the poor, unsuspecting outcast right before she gets publicly humiliated. “Do you think Ana is trying to play some kind of prank?” I whispered.
“No way.” Juliette sounded confident, but I wasn’t so sure. She noticed my skepticism and shook her head. “Seriously. Did you notice the lack of snottiness this morning? Mom read us both the riot act last night and told us that if either of us so much as frowned at you today, we would be grounded until we were thirty.”
Great. Not that I didn’t appreciate the gesture, but that had to have pissed Anastasia off more than anything. I was lucky she hadn’t exploded already.
“It’s not Ana,” Juliette insisted.
“Well, it’s definitely something,” Rob muttered, frowning at a couple of guys who were staring at me.
“I’ll figure it out,” Juliette said as we reached her homeroom. “Lunch together today?”
“You know where to find me.”
Juliette disappeared into her classroom, and Rob scowled at everyone we passed as he walked me to mine. He was as skeptical about my stepsister as I was, because he said, “It had to be Ana. Vivian wouldn’t have said anything. I’ll figure out what’s going on.”
He’d stopped us at the door to my classroom and grabbed my hand so that I couldn’t walk away. A girl whose name I didn’t remember accidentally bumped into my shoulder as she walked past us into the room. “Watch it!” she snapped. When she realized it was me in her way, her eyes narrowed. “You think you’re so special now? Well, you’re not.”
Another girl walked in behind her, smiling viciously. “I bet she paid him to do it.”
They walked to their seats, cackling.
More confused than ever, I looked at Rob again. “You going to be okay until lunch?” he asked.
The worry in his eyes made me smile. “I guess you don’t remember what it was like for me when I first got here,” I teased.
His face grew dark, a storm of emotion brewing in his eyes. I felt terrible when I realized he knew exactly what I’d been through these past months, and how much it upset him. “Hey.” I gave his hand a squeeze. “It’s all good. I’m fine. Thank you for my flower.”
He finally smiled. “You’re welcome.”