An Uncertain Choice

“I would have supposed you anxious to avoid my presence for fear of what prize I might claim from you for my win today.” The low sultriness of his tone made my insides quiver.

“Quite the opposite, sir.” I forced myself to banter even though his nearness made it difficult for me to concentrate on formulating a coherent response. “I’ve been curious to see what you have in mind.”

I wanted to duck under the table at the boldness of my words, but I walked as regally as I could to my place. And I kept my focus straight ahead as he pulled out my chair and helped me into my seat before taking the chair at my side. He didn’t say anything, and ere long I couldn’t resist peeking at him. He was smiling and there was a hint of admiration in his eyes, as if he’d appreciated our witty exchange.

I took a sip of ale from my goblet. Perhaps I didn’t have to be afraid of speaking to him and getting to know him better after all. Perhaps I could practice more of the noblewomen’s suggestions than I’d believed possible.

What ought I do first from their list?

I swiveled in my seat, deciding it wouldn’t hurt to compliment him. “You were quite talented today, sir. I’m quite in awe of your fighting skills.”

He was in the middle of taking a swallow of his ale. At my words of praise, he choked. “Thank you, my lady,” he finally said after sputtering through a cough. “I don’t deserve your . . . awe.”

“Don’t listen to him,” Sir Collin called from his spot down the table. He and Sir Bennet still brooded, but Sir Collin put on a brave smile. “Derrick handles the lance and the halberd better than any other knight in the land.”

Sir Bennet pushed away from the table and stood so abruptly that the platters and goblets rattled. He glared at Derrick, his brows coming together in a dark scowl. Next to me, I could feel Derrick stiffen as though anticipating a battle with his friend.

For a long moment the two locked eyes, and the chatter of the other guests came to a halt. Then finally Sir Bennet raised his goblet. “I’d like to propose a toast to the champion of today’s joust.” He pointed his cup at Derrick and everyone else did likewise before taking a sip.

As the conversations resumed, Sir Bennet sat down but gave Derrick a low parting comment. “You may have won the tournament, but that doesn’t mean you’ve yet won Lady Rosemarie’s heart.”

For a long moment the two men seemed to be waging a silent war, until finally Sir Collin elbowed Sir Bennet and muttered something in his ear.

Derrick was silent as the servants placed the steaming platters of boar upon the table, along with meat pies, fish tarts, and cow’s tongue.

I wanted to apologize for any tension I was causing between the men, but before I could formulate the words, Derrick spoke. “Have no fear, my lady. No matter our squabbles, we shall always remain the closest of companions.” I raised my brow in skepticism.

“They’re the best friends a man could ever ask for.” Derrick spoke as though to convince himself as he speared a piece of pork on his trencher with the tip of his knife and took a bite.

I twisted my spoon above my bowl of thick Bukkenade soup. I ought to let him eat in peace. He was likely famished after the day of jousting. But a whisper in the back of my mind reminded me that I had no time to wait, that the month was already half over, and that if I wasn’t more forthright, I might very well forfeit this beautiful thing I was beginning to feel.

And it was indeed beautiful.

I glanced sideways, as subtly as possible, at Derrick. The outline of his strong features alone was enough to warm my stomach in a sweet but aching way. I couldn’t let his reticence or my own shyness stop me from exploring the feelings further, could I?

With a resolute breath, I turned in my chair and faced him. “Have you been friends with Sir Collin and Sir Bennet for a long time?”

He swallowed his bite of food. “We’ve known each other forever — ?or at least since the day we all arrived at Rivenshire to begin our training.”

“Ah, then you were pages together?” I smiled at the picture I conjured of the three as little boys running around, wrestling together, and swinging their blunt swords in practice. I could imagine they were handsome even as wild urchins.

He grinned as if he too were remembering them together as boys. “We were quite the handful.”

“The duke was daring to take you all under his care at one time.”

Derrick’s smile faded. “I don’t know what would have become of me, if not for him.”

I couldn’t keep from thinking back to the rumors I’d heard about him that afternoon. My own mood sobered. “Is it true then that your family was murdered?”

My question was a gentle whisper, but his gaze jumped to mine as though I’d slapped him.