chapter 12
Frenzy stared at the box sitting on the kitchen table. “The queen was here? She gave you this?”
His mouth tasted of sawdust. Death had no need of sleep. And yet, he could remember nothing in the hours that Mila said she’d been outside speaking with his queen.
He felt her eyes on him, burning like questioning embers. Frenzy looked up. “What did she want?”
Yanking the pale pink shirt he’d bought her yesterday over her head, she brushed back her hair with her fingers as best she could before shrugging. “As best as I can tell, she wants me to somehow stop the shadow with that.” She pointed at the innocuous-looking piece of wood.
But he knew better than most that power wasn’t measured by the beauty or worth of an object; the most powerful usually rested within an object easily overlooked. Picking up the miniature jewelry box, he cracked open the lid. The inside was covered in dark velvet. On the surface there was nothing extraordinary, but there was a definite tingle of power emanating from within the object. It hummed along his skin like electrical static.
“What is it?” she asked in a hushed tone.
“If I had to guess, this is a containment device.”
Nibbling on her thumbnail, she eyed it speculatively.
Setting the box down precisely where it’d been, he gripped onto the kitchen chair. “The queen does nothing without an interest being met. What did you offer her?”
It didn’t seem in keeping with what he knew of Mila to think she’d ever knowingly work alongside the queen. It made him sick to his stomach that he’d been unaware of her presence. Yes, they’d been considering heading into faerie today, but that was with him to guard her. To keep her presence hidden from the masses, to protect her. She’d been alone with the queen of darkness. The thought of it made his blood run cold.
Rubbing the back of her mouth with her hand, she shook her head. She looked tired. Not so much in her actual appearance, but the vitality of her flesh now looked muted, the whites of her eyes were bloodshot, and she kept pinching the bridge of her nose.
“I didn’t offer her anything. But she definitely wants something.”
She didn’t even have to say it—Frenzy already knew what the queen wanted. The same thing she’d always wanted.
Power.
And this seer was that.
Tunneling blunt fingers through his bed head, he growled, “Did she say anything else?”
She nodded. “Aye. She said she’ll be sending the shadow our way.”
Pushing away from the chair so hard he caused it to rock back and forth on its legs, he strode to the bed and began hastily dressing. “We’re leaving.”
She looked around. “Where?”
“We’re going to the X.”
Her eyes widened. “To Lise’s club? That’s in the heart of San Francisco. Now that my cover’s been blown—”
“Your image isn’t plastered all over the city. If we go in under the cover of darkness you shouldn’t have anything to worry about. And I’ll be there.” Walking up to her, he grazed her cheek with the pad of his thumb. “I’ll keep you safe. I vow it.”
Clutching onto his wrist with both of her hands, she took a deep breath.
“It’s the only way. We cannot stay here until The Morrigan sets the shadow on us. The queen does nothing out of the kindness of her heart. We have to discover her true motivation. Only then can we formulate any kind of plan.”
Nibbling on her bottom lip, she made his heart clench in his chest because she looked so innocent, almost fragile. Bringing out a masculine need to guard and protect, he clipped his head. “We’ll be fine,” he said with determination, but he wasn’t sure whether he was saying it more for her benefit or his own.
“I trust you, death,” she finally said. “Do I have time to at least brush my teeth?”
Brushing his lips gently over hers, he nodded. “Go ahead. It’ll take me a quick second to pack up our stuff and ward the cabin again.”
In no time he had what few clothes and personal items they’d collected gathered up and was walking outside to reactivate the wards built into the frame of the house.
He pressed his palm against the heated section of wood, his touch activating the magic, his power radiating like a spider’s web from the center of the ward, branching outward and encasing the cabin. Quickly he moved around the last three sections, ensuring that the individual threads twined, forming a net over the entire structure.
Done with his task, he leaned against the wall, staring out at the woods. They’d been on the run from the moment he’d met her. It seemed like a lifetime ago. They hadn’t known many seconds of peace, except here. Deep in the redwood forest, where their only neighbors were squirrels and the occasional black bear.
His mouth turned down into a frown. This had been her whole life, running from one safe spot to the next until her cover was blown and she was forced to start fresh all over again.
She’d blossomed out here, laughed, and touched something cold and hollow in his heart. Made him feel again. He wanted better for her than this, wanted to make things right.
It was too early in the day to head to Lise’s yet, but they couldn’t stay here either. Not with The Morrigan planning on sending the shadow here.
“You ready?” she asked in the throaty, sultry morning voice he was coming to crave hearing.
She’d pulled back her hair, exposing the sharp slashes of cheekbone and dark hollows beneath her bloodshot eyes. She needed to eat again. Even the shirt and shorts she’d filled out nicely just yesterday now seemed to hang on her frame. It frustrated him how little he knew how to take care of her. Lise and George had been correct when they’d accused him of losing touch with the world he now lived in.
She shivered, staring over her shoulder at the cabin. “I don’t know what just happened, but all of sudden I want to get away from this place. Feels creepy as hell.”
“It’s the wards,” he said distractedly.
She must have noticed his tone, because she turned to him sharply. “What’s the matter? Did you see something?” Her eyes scanned the perimeter.
The thundering pitch of her sluggish heartbeat vibrated through his ears. “You need to eat.”
She curled her nose. “I’m not hungry.”
“Then if you’re not hungry, you need to drink, don’t you?”
Grimacing, she wrapped her arms tight around her chest as her tongue poked out, touching her gum line. Closing her eyes, she didn’t answer.
“Should I find an animal?”
“No,” she said in loudly accented Irish. “I don’t want to drink from an animal.” Her eyes were bright, almost fevered looking.
“A human?” He raised a brow. What little he knew of the vampires, he understood that the best source of food came straight from their preferred marks. Mortals.
Her nose curled. “I won’t do that either.”
She’d enjoyed drinking from him the other day. Perhaps he could convince her to take from him again. Stepping into her space, wrapping his hands around her waist, he tilted his neck to the side. “Then take from me.”
Hunger scrawled across her face, and her irises bled through and slitted like a cat’s. The smell of her desire was a heady musk in his nostrils and it increased his own desire for her to tap into him. Planting a quick kiss against the hollow of her neck, he whispered, “I can smell your desire.”
She was trembling in his arms, he could feel her latent power roiling throughout her frame, like holding on to a live wire that was seconds from exploding. She lowered her head, and her heated breaths licked his flesh, made him shiver in anticipation of the pain and pleasure.
“No.” She shoved him back, shaking her head several times. “No,” she said again, more powerfully. “Biting into your flesh”—she swallowed hard—“my teeth are blunt. I’m just chewing at your throat…It’s”—her upper lip curled back—“repulsive.”
Mila said that, but he sensed that she enjoyed it more than she felt she should.
“You have to eat.” Calling forth his change, he turned his hand bony then touched the tip of it to his carotid. If she wouldn’t bite him, he’d open the vein himself.
“Stop it, Frenzy.” She slapped his hand away. “I’m not going to feed off you. No more.”
“Why not?” he growled, glaring at her.
“Because when I do I want it more. I want so much more. And I don’t want to lose myself. Don’t you understand? I don’t want to become a monster with no conscience. I accept what I am, but I don’t want to lose my ability to view people as people rather than food.” Her words were pleading and so heartfelt he couldn’t help but understand.
Even if he didn’t agree.
“There are vampires who can make the feeding something to be desired by a mortal. You do not have to drain them. And I do not care if you feed on me; I enjoyed it.”
“Well, you shouldn’t. I ripped into you with my blunt stupid teeth. I can’t even pierce, Frenzy. What is to enjoy about that experience?”
“You have to eat,” he said again, stubbornly.
“Fine!” She tossed up her hands. “I’ll go find a squirrel.” So saying, she took off.
She wasn’t as fast as she typically was when in full strength, but they were putting miles between themselves and the cabin at the very least. They ran for hours and, sensing that she was trying to put distance between them, he paced her, but far enough back that while she’d know he was around, she wouldn’t have to see him.
Eventually, after five hours of running, she finally stopped, panting heavily against the trunk of a tree. “I’m sorry,” she admitted.
Realizing it was now safe for him to show himself, he stopped just to the side of her. He’d had hours to think about what this might be. More than just the food, or the feeding methods she’d have to employ, this was about the queen and how shaken she’d been.
“You’re spooked, Mila.”
Her gaze shot to his, and though her face looked haggard and worn, there was a sparkle of surprise in their depths as well. “You called me Mila,” she whispered.
Only because he’d wanted her full attention, and now he’d gotten it. Unable to resist touching her, he caressed her jawline. Her skin was hot to the touch and paper dry. He nodded. “Understand that going without eating will not kill you. It will only make you crazed.”
She squeezed the trunk of the tree, splintering sections of bark off in her hands. “I know. I ate the steak last night. I loved it, so why do I crave blood? Why is it when I blink all I see is red?” Her breathing stuttered. “The queen found me through you,” she finally whispered.
Grabbing her by the shoulders, he pulled her into his chest, patting her spine up and down, soothing her as best he could. “Was that why you were angry with me?”
“I wasn’t…” She sighed. “I’m not angry with you, Frenzy. It’s just…” She sniffed, shaking her head against his shirt. “I don’t want to run anymore.”
His brows dipped. “Are you considering doing the queen’s bidding?”
It took a minute for her to answer. “I don’t know what I’m thinking.”
Just then a chirping sound caught his attention. Looking up, he spotted a bushy red tail disappearing around a branch. “I’m going to get you food. You’re weak and you need to drink.”
Disengaging herself, she leaned heavily against the trunk of the tree. “I’m always apologizing to you. I’m sorry, Frenzy. None of this is your fault; sometimes it’s just easier to let my temper get the best of me than to cry.”
Tipping her chin up, he gazed into her eyes, eyes that he no longer compared to Adrianna’s. She was Mila; he saw her. He finally saw her and now that he did, he wasn’t going to let her go, not without a fight.
“No more. You hear me?” He lifted a brow. “You have a problem, you talk to me. You do not run away.”
She nodded, and then sealed that with a kiss. Taking his lips in a short but sweet exploration, knocking the breath from his body.
When they pulled back he was at a loss for words, and with one final look of adoration he jumped, landing gracefully on a thick branch. Closing his eyes, he listened. It would be so much simpler to breathe death into the tree, but it would kill the squirrel, and it was vital Mila was able to tap into a living source.
The faint chatter of not one, but two squirrels pricked his senses. It would be easier to come from behind the animals than to pursue them like a stalking predator. Opening a rift in time, he stepped inside, quickly triangulating their position in relation to where his had been. Something he’d done all his life.
Stepping out, he snatched up the rodents by their tails, careful to not allow any part of death to leak into their bodies. They went wild, nipping and clawing at him, making him wish for a second they weren’t much-needed food, because he was sorely tempted to wring their necks.
When he returned to Mila, she looked even worse. She was sitting with her arms draped over her knees and her head hanging down.
“Here.” He handed her the nearly rabid creatures.
Even the way she turned to look at him made it seem like she’d expended a lot of effort. “I…can’t,” she croaked.
“Damn it, O’Fallen!” he barked. “You will eat.” Setting one of the squirrels down, he planted his foot on its tail to keep it from running, then, calling forth his own glamour—the magic inborn—he turned his own teeth to fangs and pierced the furry animal’s neck.
It whimpered and spun in his hands pitifully as it fought in vain to get away. Tipping Mila’s head up, he shoved the squirrel into her mouth, letting gravity work as it forced the blood down her throat.
At first she was pliant, but after three seconds she grabbed on to the squirrel herself and sucked deeply. Color returned to her cheeks. Not a lot, but she no longer looked mummified.
When she pulled it out, the creature was obviously dead. “More.” Her lashes fluttered.
Deciding she could probably handle the next one, he passed it along to her. But just as she had with him, Mila’s frenzied bite ripped out of the poor animal’s neck. Groaning, she lapped at the mess she’d made. Blood was all over her previously pink shirt. But even as she sucked up the blood, shame spread across her face. Her mouth turned downward and she shifted on her bottom, trying to turn away from him.
Deciding he didn’t want to humiliate her, he turned on his heel, giving his back to her and hopefully giving her enough time to try and right the mess she’d made.
“You…you can turn.” She whispered after a few minutes.
When he did, his jaw dropped. She’d stripped the shirt off and was now only in a sexy red bra. His nostrils flared, heat pooled thick into his gaze, and he wanted her to see it. Wanted her to know that he didn’t view her as a monster or as something vile.
She wiped the back of her mouth with fingers. Holding up the bloody shirt, she twisted her lips. “It was dirty.”
“It’s okay.” He grabbed it from her and tossed it to the ground. “We’ll get another.”
She merely chuckled, but didn’t respond back. “Can we head to Lise’s now?”
Glancing up at the darkening sky, he nodded. “It’ll be night soon. We’re safe to head into the city. Are you okay, though? Do you need more?”
“No.” She shook her head quickly, tucking a loosened strand of hair behind her ear. “I’m satisfied.”
She was too quick with her words, which made him wonder whether she was lying.
“Really.” She smiled and it was dazzling. Her skin looked flushed and pearly again.
Holding out his hand, he said, “Then are you ready?”
Looking down at her half-nude self, she laughed ruefully. “Since I can’t go back for a shirt, I suppose I’m as ready as I’ll ever be.”
* * *
She hadn’t wanted to tell him the truth. The animal’s blood, while it’d been warm and delicious going down, was settling wrong in her stomach. It called to mind the deer she’d taken from and what had happened afterward. Was she allergic to animal blood? As much as it’d disgusted her to feed from the animal, she knew Frenzy was right. She had to feed. But her stomach was not adjusting well to her most recent meal.
She didn’t have this reaction when she drank from Frenzy.
He was like a god among men, and his blood had been ambrosia. She had a feeling drinking from him would never be the same as drinking from anything else, even a human. And as much as she’d craved more, yearned for it to the point that she’d nearly attacked during sex last night, she’d refrained.
She hadn’t lied when she’d told him that it’d been too good. The only comparison she had for it was like someone taking a hit of heroin for the first time. Her senses had flooded, her mind had been clearer, sharper; and the taste of him, like champagne.
Gods.
It’d been so overwhelming, made her feel ravenous, and for a split second the thought had crossed her mind that being an immortal, she could drink and drink and drink her fill of him, knowing he’d never die.
But she knew something about vampires, something he didn’t seem to be aware of. The more they took from the same source, the weaker that source would eventually become—even if they drank from immortals. She could literally suck all vitality out of him to the point that he would live only to be her food.
Faerie were strong, and there was a lot yet she didn’t know about him. It was entirely possible that she couldn’t trance him that way. But she had no real way of knowing since she’d never heard of a fae offering himself up to the avarice of the vampire. It just wasn’t worth the risk.
His thumb rubbed circles at the base of her back. She shivered, clutching him tight. The trip through space and time wasn’t as scary this time around as it’d been the first, but it was long, only helping to increase her dread of stepping foot back in that city.
“Are you okay?” he asked, his lips close to the shell of her ear, which made her stomach curl with sexual longing so fierce she had to shut her eyes and count to ten before trusting herself to speak.
“I’m fine.”
Silver eyes stared at her, as if knowing she was lying. He knew; he wasn’t a fool. But he also didn’t push it, and for that she was grateful. In fact, there was a lot about Frenzy that she liked.
He wasn’t at all what she’d expected when she’d first met him. It made her ashamed of how she’d treated him in the beginning. Cuddling into his warmth as much as possible, she leaned her head against his shoulder.
The starry tunnel they’d been traveling through suddenly turned opaque and, like a mirage in a dessert, it looked like they were staring through a sheet of shimmering heat. Objects on the other side manifested. A green Dumpster, potholes full of brackish water, brownstone apartments with fire escapes.
Frenzy hissed. “What the hell is this?”
After that, everything happened so quickly. Like an invisible giant grabbed hold of her and snatched her out of his arms, dumping her into the alleyway head over feet. Realizing instantly that they’d likely been ambushed, she swallowed the scream in her throat, landing like a cat on all fours, sniffing and scouting her surroundings.
When they’d left the woods dusk had just been starting. But the way the streetlamps hit the paved sidewalks and the absolute stillness and quiet of the usually teeming streets meant it was well past midnight.
Licking her lips, she scuttled behind the Dumpster and scented the air. There was nothing, literally no one. Where was she? This was San Francisco, but something felt very wrong, off.
“Frenzy?” she squeaked. So quiet it was more of a whisper, every flight or fight instinct inside of her was going off like the sound of a raging klaxon horn.
After five minutes, some of the panic began to wear off, helping her to think more clearly. When it did, it dawned on her that the ache in her stomach as they’d been traveling through the tunnel was definitely more intense, squeezing her intestines in a tight fist. Swallowing the bile trying to work its way back up her throat, she squeezed her eyes shut and tried to breathe through the churning nausea.
Grabbing on to her stomach, she inhaled and told herself that now was not the time to be sick. But as much as she damned herself to hell and back, her brain refused to believe that what she was feeling was all in her head. Her body suddenly broke out in a wash of sweat. Her limbs shook, a malaise unlike any she’d ever known took hold of her, and, dropping her to her knees, she threw up everything she’d just drunk.
When it was over, all she wanted to do was sleep. For an eternity. Close her eyes and never open them again. Her head was full of fuzz, her mouth tasted terrible, and her ears were ringing.
She rolled onto her side, and her breathing slowed to a crawl. It was so hard to think about anything other than the exhaustion lancing through her bones, piercing her skull. Closing her eyes, ready to give in to the sleep that beckoned, she finally heard something.
A heated whisper of conversation. “Are you sure this is where she was going to be dropped?” a deep voice rumbled.
Frowning, she tried to focus.
“Aye,” an obviously female voice snapped, “the reaper’s route was redirected. She’ll be here.”
“Nailia, you know what Frenzy will do. You’ve seen his—” The male sounded anxious.
“If you’re going to act like a whiny little bitch about this, Tronos,” Nailia hissed, “then you can return to the queen and tell her why you failed.” Her words dripped venom and spite.
Bloody hell, the queen had done this?
Mila blinked, trying to force her body into action. Slowly, inch by painful inch, she crawled backward on her hands until she was kneeling, panting heavily from the exertion used.
Somehow they hadn’t sensed her, but neither could she sense them. If she hadn’t heard them speaking she would never have known they waited just beyond the alley for her. As she took the wind into her lungs, the only things she smelled were rotten garbage and a hint of roses…
Then she frowned. Realizing what an idiot she’d been. Frenzy smelled of summer, of trees and flowers in bloom. Here in the middle of this dump she smelled roses.
The fae, they smelled of nature.
Looking up the walls of the apartments blocking her in on three sides, she knew she could jump to the rooftop. But what if there were more up there?
Why had the queen done this? She worried her bottom lip. How had she known that Frenzy and Mila would come back here?
Had everything the queen said been a lie? What was the box? Was it even anything? When they’d spoken this morning the queen had made her believe that she’d regretted the creation of the shadow almost as much as Mila did. But what if that wasn’t true? What if the queen actually did control that beast and was even now letting it stalk closer and closer to her?
Squeezing her eyes shut, wishing like hell Frenzy was close—she realized just how much she actually did need him. She’d always prided herself on being able to handle anything.
“We can’t just hang around here all night; the queen expects results,” Tronos whined.
“Gods, brother,” Nailia scoffed, “you are such a disappointment. The chit is going to be weak from no food.”
Mila could literally hear the vicious smile curl through her words. It made an icy shiver rush down her spine.
How did they know she hadn’t eaten?
“We bring her bait?” Tronos said in an “aha” tone.
“Exactly. Bring her bait,” Nailia crooned.
The way she said it, with that lilt in her tone, it made Mila’s skin crawl. She needed to find some way of escape; this couldn’t be it. She wouldn’t let it. Making her way painfully slowly to her feet, she gripped onto the edge of the green Dumpster, curling her fingers in so hard the metal began to dent. She wasn’t nearly as strong as she’d been, but she still had some strength. Not much, but maybe there was enough to get out of this mess.
Scanning the buildings one more time, she noted the nearest fire escape was at least twenty feet up. All her life her gran and mum had taught her that the way to winning was to holding on to the one thing she didn’t want to live without. To fight for something.
When she’d been alive, she’d fought for pride. Fought to prove that her gran’s and mum’s deaths hadn’t been in vain.
Then she’d met Frenzy, seen his fire and passion, the way he touched her, looked at her. How he’d tell her over and over that she wasn’t alone…He’d given her something she hadn’t had ever.
Hope.
Crouching low, she clung to that like a lifeline and willed her exhausted limbs to work one last time. Even if there were other fae waiting for her atop the roofs, at least she’d fought, at least she hadn’t stood here and waited to die.
But just as she was set to make that leap, she smelled something that sent shards of ice through her soul. Fresh, sweet, and tangy. The smell of blood. And, gods, it was heavenly. The scent of it crawled up her nose, infiltrated every thought or reason, made her unable to think about the fact that even now the fae were closing in.
That the thudding, beating heartbeat exciting her nerves to a fever pitch was most definitely the bait set out for her. That not only could she smell the blood, she could smell the fear of the human. The panting and sweating musk sliding out of his pores. It was primal, elemental. This was what she’d been created for.
What she was destined to be. A monster. The hunger grew and stretched malignant fingers deep inside her emaciated gut, whispering over and over that this was right, good, that she could not deny her nature any longer.
Eyes rolling in her skull, she took a tentative step out from behind the Dumpster. The fluttering beat of that heart was like a siren’s call, and where she’d been weak just seconds ago, a new surge of power filled her limbs.
The last dregs of her energy she’d saved to jump to freedom were now being used for one thing. Finding food.
A hunter’s instinct took over. Jumping against the wall, she dug her fingers into the brick, ripping into it like a hot knife sliding through butter. She was suddenly strong, sure. She was power; the mortal would die.
“Die,” she hissed, surveying the empty alley, stealthily moving, making sure to keep to the shadows so as not to alert her prey.
Mouth watering, she walked to the very edge of the alley and peeked her head around the building.
The two fae were standing upon a stoop. She recognized them immediately by the blast of roses in her nostrils. The man had long hair, falling down to his ankles. It was a blond that looked spun from moonlight. The female also had the same kind of hair. He was dressed in long black trench coat; she was in black leather and boots. Their faces were the same haughty, gorgeous ones she’d come to associate with the fae. Long, patrician noses, perfectly sculpted lips, and both with glowing blue eyes. The same kind of eyes she’d seen on the vampire who’d turned her.
Obviously they were twins, and it quickly crossed her mind that here was the proof the queen had indeed been in on it from the very beginning. When she’d first seen the vampire she’d had a fleeting memory of something odd about his eyes, but had quickly dismissed it since she was fighting for her life. Now she remembered mum had shown her a book once. A very old book that spoke of pledging one’s soul and honor to the queen of fae and how that pledge was sealed within the eyes, turning them an electric, shocking blue.
The queen had confessed to that this morning, but in hindsight Mila felt stupid that she hadn’t recognized it immediately.
The fae struggled with the woman in his arms.
A terrified human woman. Her brunette hair was caught up in a stylish chignon. She wore a polished plum business skirt suit with nude pumps. She obviously worked out. Her body was trim, lithe, and sleek.
Mila licked her lips, already tasting the salty sweetness, already feeling the glorious thickness of that crimson tide rush down her throat. She licked aching gums as her stomach groaned painfully, making her dizzy and breathless with hunger.
Studying the layout, she realized quickly that there were only the two fae. There were none on the rooftops, but it no longer mattered, because running away was not her priority. Getting to her food first was now the obsession.
However there was no way to snatch the woman and run. She’d be caught, likely taken by the queen’s bitches.
She snarled.
Famished as she was, going down that way pissed her off. The queen had set her up. But the hunger was making it hard to care.
Just then an image of gran’s face popped into her head. Her big, beautiful brown eyes pleading with Mila to make their sacrifice worth it. She’d be so ashamed of her now.
Breathing heavily through her nose and mouth, she tried to beat back the beast demanding the kill.
Dragging her head back and forth against the rough brick surface, she prayed for clarity. Prayed for a miracle. Her resolve was weakening by the second.
Frenzy was right: she should have fed. Should have taken from him, just once more.
She jerked to the right as the soft scratching sound of shuffling footsteps pounded through the window to the right of her. Sliding away from the edge of the building, she crawled over to the window, peeking inside.
There was a man inside.
And he was staring right back at her, terror wide in the stark whites of his eyes.
Everything went blank. She stopped thinking, stopped empathizing, because he was close and he smelled like food. A switch had flipped inside her soul, shutting off who she was, who she’d been trying to be. She wasn’t Mila, she was a monster, a vampire shifter, and she was ravenous.
Smiling, she tapped on the window. “Hello, mortal,” she breathed, and he turned on his heel to run just as she punched her fist through the glass.
With a loud cry, she chased after him, tackling him to the ground just a few feet away.
Wrapping him up, she rolled him over and then proceeded to coo in his ear, “Hush, hush, it will only hurt but a minute. Hush now…”
Then she bit.