chapter 4: A Journey
Friendship is one mind in two bodies.
-Meng-tzu
Charlotte slammed the paper down onto her desk with an exclamation of rage. "Aloysius Starkweather is the most stubborn, hypocritical, obstinate, degenerate-" She broke off, clearly fighting for control of her temper. Tessa had never seen Charlotte's mouth so firmly set into a hard line.
"Would you like a thesaurus?" Will inquired. He was sprawled in one of the wing-back armchairs near the fireplace in the drawing room, his boots up on the ottoman. They were caked with mud, and now so was the ottoman.
Normal y Charlotte would have been taking him to task for it, but the letter from Aloysius that she had received that morning, and that she had called them all into the drawing room to discuss, seemed to have absorbed all her attention. "You seem to be running out of words."
"And is he really degenerate?" Jem asked equably from the depths of the other armchair. "I mean, the old codger's almost ninety-surely past real deviancy."
"I don't know," said Will. "You'd be surprised at what some of the old fel ows over at the Devil Tavern get up to."
"Nothing anyone you know might get up to would surprise us, Will," said Jessamine, who was lying on the chaise longue, a damp cloth over her forehead. She still had not gotten over her headache.
"Darling," said Henry anxiously, coming around the desk to where his wife was sitting, "are you quite all right? You look a bit-splotchy."
He wasn't wrong. Red patches of rage had broken out over Charlotte's face and throat.
"I think it's charming," said Will. "I've heard polka dots are the last word in fashion this season."
Henry patted Charlotte's shoulder anxiously. "Would you like a cool cloth? What can I do to help?"
"You could ride up to Yorkshire and chop that old goat's head off."
Charlotte sounded mutinous.
"Won't that make things rather awkward with the Clave?" asked Henry.
"They're not general y very receptive about, you know, beheadings and things."
"Oh!" said Charlotte in despair. "It's all my fault, isn't it? I don't know why I thought I could win him over. The man's a nightmare."
"What did he say exactly?" said Will. "In the letter, I mean."
"He refuses to see me, or Henry," said Charlotte. "He says he'l never forgive my family for what my father did. My father . . ." She sighed. "He was a difficult man. Absolutely faithful to the letter of the Law, and the Starkweathers have always interpreted the Law more loosely. My father thought they lived wild up there in the north, like savages, and he wasn't shy about saying so. I don't know what else he did, but old Aloysius seems personal y insulted still.
Not to mention that he also said if I really cared what he thought about anything, I would have invited him to the last Council meeting. As if I'm in charge of that sort of thing!"
"Why wasn't he invited?" inquired Jem.
"He's too old-not meant to be running an Institute at all. He just refuses to step down, and so far Consul Wayland hasn't made him, but the Consul won't invite him to Councils either. I think he hopes Aloysius Will either take the hint or simply die of old age. But Aloysius's father lived to be a hundred and four. We could be in for another fifteen years of him." Charlotte shook her head in despair.
"Well, if he won't see you or Henry, can't you send someone else?" asked Jessamine in a bored voice. "You run the Institute; the Enclave members are supposed to do whatever you say."
"But so many of them are on Benedict's side," said Charlotte. "They want to see me fail. I just don't know who I can trust."
"You can trust us," said Will. "Send me. And Jem."
"What about me?" said Jessamine indignantly.
"What about you? You don't really want to go, do you?"
Jessamine lifted a corner of the damp cloth off her eyes to glare. "On some smel y train all the way up to deadly dull Yorkshire? No, of course not. I just wanted Charlotte to say she could trust me."
"I can trust you, Jessie, but you're clearly not well enough to go. Which is unfortunate, since Aloysius always had a weakness for a pretty face."
"Even more reason why I should go," said Will.
"Will, Jem . . ." Charlotte bit her lip. "Are you sure? The Council was hardly best pleased by the independent actions you took in the matter of Mrs.
Dark."
"Well, they ought to be. We kil ed a dangerous demon!" Will protested.
"And we saved Church," said Jem.
"Somehow I doubt that counts in our favor," said Will. "That cat bit me three times the other night."
"That probably does count in your favor," said Tessa. "Or Jem's, at least."
Will made a face at her, but didn't seem angry; it was the sort of face he might have made at Jem had the other boy mock insulted him. Perhaps they real y could be civil to each other, Tessa thought. He had been quite kind to her in the library the night before last.
"It seems a fool's errand," said Charlotte. The red splotches on her skin were beginning to fade, but she looked miserable. "He isn't likely to tell you anything if he knows I sent you. If only-"
"Charlotte," Tessa said, "there is a way we could make him tell us."
Charlotte looked at her in puzzlement. "Tessa, what do you-" She broke off then, light dawning in her eyes. "Oh, I see. Tessa, what an excel ent idea."
"Oh, what?" demanded Jessamine from the chaise. "What idea?"
"If something of his could be retrieved," said Tessa, "and given to me, I could use it to Change into him. And perhaps access his memories. I could tel you what he recol ects about Mortmain and the Shades, if anything at all."
"Then, you'l come with us to Yorkshire," said Jem.
Suddenly all eyes in the room were on Tessa. Thoroughly startled, for a moment she said nothing.
"She hardly needs to accompany us," said Will. "We can retrieve an object and bring it back to her here."
"But Tessa's said before that she needs to use something that has strong associations for the wearer," said Jem. "If what we select turns out to be insufficient-"
"She also said she can use a nail clipping, or a strand of hair-"
"So you're suggesting we take the train up to York, meet a ninety-year-old man, leap on him, and yank out his hair? I'm sure the Clave Will be ecstatic."
"They'l just say you're mad," said Jessamine. "They already think it, so what's the difference, real y?"
"It's up to Tessa," said Charlotte. "It's her power you're asking to use; it should be her decision."
"Did you say we'd be taking the train?" Tessa asked, looking over at Jem.
He nodded, his silver eyes dancing. "The Great Northern runs trains out of Kings Cross all day long," he said. "It's only a matter of hours."
"Then, I'll come," said Tessa. "I've never been on a train."
Will threw up his hands. "That's it? You're coming because you've never been on a train before?"
"Yes," she said, knowing how much her calm demeanor drove him mad. "I should like to ride in one, very much."
"Trains are great dirty smoky things," said Will. "You won't like it."
Tessa was unmoved. "I won't know if I like it until I try it, Will I?"
"I've never swum naked in the Thames, but I know I wouldn't like it."
"But think how entertaining for sightseers," said Tessa, and she saw Jem duck his head to hide the quick flash of his grin. "Anyway, it doesn't matter. I wish to go, and I shall. When do we leave?"
Will rol ed his eyes, but Jem was still grinning. "Tomorrow morning. That way we'l arrive well before dark."
"I'll have to send Aloysius a message saying to expect you," said Charlotte, picking up her pen. She paused, and looked up at them all. "Is this a dreadful idea? I-I feel as if I cannot be sure."
Tessa looked at her worriedly-seeing Charlotte like this, doubting her own instincts, made her hate Benedict Lightwood and his cohorts even more than she already did.
It was Henry who stepped up and put a gentle hand on his wife's shoulder.
"The only alternative seems to be doing nothing, dearest Charlotte," he said.
"And doing nothing, I find, rarely accomplishes anything. Besides, what could go wrong?"
"Oh, by the Angel, I wish you hadn't asked that," replied Charlotte with fervor, but she bent over the paper and began to write.
That afternoon was Tessa's and Sophie's second training session with the Lightwoods. Having changed into her gear, Tessa left her room to find Sophie waiting for her in the corridor. She was dressed to train as well, her hair knotted up expertly behind her head, and a dark expression on her face.
"Sophie, what is it?" Tessa inquired, fal ing into step beside the other girl.
"You look quite out of countenance."
"Well, if you must know . . ." Sophie dropped her voice. "It's Bridget."
"Bridget?" The Irish girl had been nearly invisible in the kitchen since she'd arrived, unlike Cyril, who had been here and there about the house, doing errands like Sophie. The last memory Tessa had of Bridget involved her sitting atop Gabriel Lightwood with a knife. She let herself dwel on it pleasantly for a moment. "What's she done?"
"She just . . ." Sophie let out a gusty sigh. "She isn't very amiable. Agatha was my friend, but Bridget-well, we have a way of talking, among us servants, you know, usual y, but Bridget just won't. Cyril's friendly enough, but Bridget just keeps to herself in the kitchen, singing those awful Irish bal ads of hers. I'd wager she's singing one now."
They were passing not far from the scul ery door; Sophie gestured for Tessa to fol ow her, and together they crept close and peered inside. The scul ery was quite large, with doors leading off to the kitchen and pantry. The sideboard was piled with food meant for dinner-fish and vegetables, lately cleaned and prepared. Bridget stood at the sink, her hair standing out around her head in wild red curls, made frizzy by the humidity of the water.
She was singing too; Sophie had been quite right about that. Her voice drifting over the sound of the water was high and sweet.
"Oh, her father led her down the stair, Her mother combed her yellow hair.
Her sister A nn led her to the cross, And her brother John set her on her horse.
'Now you are high and I am low, Give me a kiss before ye go.' She leaned down to give him a kiss, He gave her a deep wound and did not miss.
And with a knife as sharp as a dart, Her brother stabbed her to the heart."
Nate's face flashed in front of Tessa's eyes, and she shuddered. Sophie, looking past her, didn't seem to notice. "That's all she sings about," she whispered. "Murder and betrayal. Blood and pain. It's horrid."
Merciful y Sophie's voice covered the end of the song. Bridget had begun drying dishes and started up with a new bal ad, the tune even more melancholy than the first.
"Why does your sword so drip with blood,
Edward, Edward?
Why does your sword so drip with blood?
And why so sad are ye?"
"Enough of this." Sophie turned and began hurrying down the hal ; Tessa fol owed. "You do see what I meant, though? She's so dreadful y morbid, and it's awful sharing a room with her. She never says a word in the morning or at night, just moans-"
"You share a room with her?" Tessa was astonished. "But the Institute has so many rooms-"
"For visiting Shadowhunters," Sophie said. "Not for servants." She spoke matter-of-factly, as if it would never have occurred to her to question or complain about the fact that dozens of grand rooms stood empty while she shared a room with Bridget, singer of murderous bal ads.
"I could talk to Charlotte-," Tessa began.
"Oh, no. Please don't." They had reached the door to the training room.
Sophie turned to her, all distress. "I wouldn't want her to think I'd been complaining about the other servants. I really wouldn't, Miss Tessa."
Tessa was about to assure the other girl that she would say nothing to Charlotte if that was what Sophie really wanted, when she heard raised voices from the other side of the training room door. Gesturing at Sophie to be quiet, she leaned in and listened.
The voices were quite clearly those of the Lightwood brothers. She recognized Gideon's lower, rougher tones as he said, "There Will be a moment of reckoning, Gabriel. You can depend upon it. What Will matter is where we stand when it comes."
Gabriel replied, his voice tense, "We Will stand with Father, of course.
Where else?"
There was a pause. Then, "You don't know everything about him, Gabriel.
You don't know all that he has done."
"I know that we are Lightwoods and that he is our father. I know he full y expected to be named head of the Institute when Granvil e Fairchild died-"
"Maybe the Consul knows more about him than you do. And more about Charlotte Branwell. She isn't the fool you think she is."
"Real y?" Gabriel's voice was a sneer. "Letting us come here to train her precious girls, doesn't that make her a fool? Shouldn't she have assumed we'd be spying for our father?"
Sophie and Tessa looked at each other with round eyes.
"She agreed to it because the Consul forced her hand. And besides, we are met at the door here, escorted to this room, and escorted out. And Miss Col ins and Miss Gray know nothing of import. What damage is our presence here really doing her, would you say?"
There was a silence through which Tessa could almost hear Gabriel sulking. At last he said, "If you despise Father so much, why did you ever come back from Spain?"
Gideon replied, sounding exasperated, "I came back for you-"
Sophie and Tessa had been leaning against the door, ears pressed to the wood. At that moment the door gave way and swung open. Both straightened hastily, Tessa hoping that no evidence of their eavesdropping appeared on their faces.
Gabriel and Gideon were standing in a patch of light at the center of the room, facing off against each other. Tessa noticed something she had not noticed before: Gabriel, despite being the younger brother, was lankily tal er than Gideon by some inches. Gideon was more muscular, broader through the shoulders. He swept a hand through his sandy hair, nodding curtly to the girls as they appeared in the doorway. "Good day."
Gabriel Lightwood strode across the room to meet them. He really was quite tall, Tessa thought, craning her neck to look up at him. As a tal girl herself, she didn't often find herself bending her head back to look up at men, though both Will and Jem were tal er than she was.
"Miss Lovelace still regrettably absent?" he inquired without bothering to greet them. His face was calm, the only sign of his earlier agitation a pulse hammering just beneath a Courage in Combat rune inked upon his throat.
"She continues to have the headache," said Tessa, following him into the training room. "We don't know how long she'l be indisposed."
"Until these training sessions are over, I suspect," said Gideon, so dryly that Tessa was surprised when Sophie laughed. Sophie immediately composed her features again, but not before Gideon had given her a surprised, almost appreciative glance, as if he weren't used to having his jokes laughed at.
With a sigh Gabriel reached up and freed two long sticks from their holsters on the wall. He handed one to Tessa. "Today," he began, "we shal be working on parrying and blocking . . ."
As usual, Tessa lay awake a long time that night before sleep began to come. Nightmares had plagued her recently-usual y of Mortmain, his cold gray eyes, and his colder voice saying measuredly that he had made her, that There is no Tessa Gray.
She had come face-to-face with him, the man they sought, and still she did not really know what he wanted from her. To marry her, but why? To claim her power, but to what end? The thought of his cold lizardlike eyes on her made her shiver; the thought that he might have had something to do with her birth was even worse. She did not think anyone-not even Jem, wonderful understanding Jem-quite understood her burning need to know what she was, or the fear that she was some sort of monster, a fear that woke her in the middle of the night, leaving her gasping and clawing at her own skin, as if she could peel it away to reveal a devil's hide beneath.
Just then she heard a rustle at her door, and the faint scratch of something being gently pushed against it. After a moment's pause she slid off the bed and padded across the room.
She eased the door open to find an empty corridor, the faint sound of violin music drifting from Jem's room across the hall. At her feet was a smal green book. She picked it up and gazed at the words stamped in gold on its spine: "Vathek, by William Beckford."
She shut the door behind her and carried the book over to her bed, sitting down so she could examine it. Will must have left it for her. Obviously it could have been no one else. But why? Why these odd, smal kindnesses in the dark, the talk about books, and the coldness the rest of the time?
She opened the book to its title page. Will had scrawled a note for her there-not just a note, in fact. A poem.
For Tessa Gray, on the occasion of being given a copy of Vathek to read: Caliph Vathek and his dark horde A re bound for Hell, you won't be bored!
Your faith in me will be restored- Unless this token you find untoward And my poor gift you have ignored.
-Wil Tessa burst out laughing, then clapped a hand over her mouth. Drat Will, for always being able to make her laugh, even when she didn't want to, even when she knew that opening her heart to him even an inch was like taking a pinch of some deadly addictive drug. She dropped the copy of Vathek, complete with Will 's deliberately terrible poem, onto her nightstand and rol ed onto the bed, burying her face in the pil ows. She could still hear Jem's violin music, sweetly sad, drifting beneath her door. As hard as she could, she tried to push thoughts of Will out of her mind; and indeed, when she fel asleep at last and dreamed, for once he made no appearance.
It rained the next day, and despite her umbrel a Tessa could feel the fine hat she had borrowed from Jessamine beginning to sag like a waterlogged bird around her ears as they-she, Jem, Will, and Cyril, carrying their luggage- hurried from the coach into Kings Cross Station. Through the sheets of gray rain she was conscious only of a tall, imposing building, a great clock tower rising from the front. It was topped with a weathercock that showed that the wind was blowing due north-and not gently, spattering drops of cold rain into her face.
Inside, the station was chaos: people hurrying hither and thither, newspaper boys hawking their wares, men striding up and down with sandwich boards strapped to their chests, advertising everything from hair tonic to soap. A little boy in a Norfolk jacket dashed to and fro, his mother in hot pursuit. With a word to Jem, Will vanished immediately into the crowd.
"Gone off and left us, has he?" said Tessa, struggling with her umbrel a, which was refusing to close.
"Let me do that." Deftly Jem reached over and flicked at the mechanism; the umbrel a shut with a decided snap. Pushing her damp hair out of her eyes, Tessa smiled at him, just as Will returned with an aggrieved-looking porter who relieved Cyril of the baggage and snapped at them to hurry up, the train wouldn't wait all day.
Will looked from the porter to Jem's cane, and back. His blue eyes narrowed. "It Will wait for us," Will said with a deadly smile.
The porter looked bewildered but said "Sir" in a decidedly less aggressive tone and proceeded to lead them toward the departure platform. People-so many people!-streamed about Tessa as she made her way through the crowd, clutching at Jem with one hand and Jessamine's hat with the other.
Far at the end of the station, where the tracks ran out into open ground, she could see the steel gray sky, smudged with soot.
Jem helped her up into their compartment; there was much bustling about the luggage, and Will tipping the porter in among shouts and whistling as the train prepared to depart. The door swung shut behind them just as the train pul ed forward, steam rushing past the windows in white drifts, wheels clacking merrily.
"Did you bring anything to read on the journey?" asked Will, settling into the seat opposite Tessa; Jem was beside her, his cane leaning up against the wall.
She thought of the copy of Vathek and his poem in it; she had left it at the Institute to avoid temptation, the way you might leave behind a box of candies if you were banting and didn't want to put on weight. "No," she said.
"I haven't come across anything I particularly wanted to read lately."
Will 's jaw set, but he said nothing.
"There is always something so exciting about the start of a journey, don't you think?" Tessa went on, nose to the window, though she could see little but smoke and soot and hurtling gray rain; London was a dim shadow in the mist.
"No," said Will as he sat back and pulled his hat down over his eyes.
Tessa kept her face against the glass as the gray of London began to fal away behind them, and with it the rain. Soon they were rol ing through green fields dotted with white sheep, with here and there the point of a vil age steeple in the distance. The sky had turned from steel to a damp, misty blue, and smal black clouds scudded overhead. Tessa watched it all with fascination.
"Haven't you ever been in the countryside before?" asked Jem, though unlike Will 's, his question had the flavor of actual curiosity.
Tessa shook her head. "I don't remember ever leaving New York, except to go to Coney Island, and that isn't really countryside. I suppose I must have passed through some of it when I came from Southampton with the Dark Sisters, but it was dark, and they kept the curtains across the windows, besides." She took off her hat, which was dripping water, and laid it on the seat between them to dry. "But I feel as if I have seen it before. In books. I keep imagining I'll see Thornfield Hal rising up beyond the trees, or Wuthering Heights perched on a stony crag-"
"Wuthering Heights is in Yorkshire," said Will, from under his hat, "and we're nowhere near Yorkshire yet. We haven't even reached Grantham. And there's nothing that impressive about Yorkshire. Hil s and dales, no proper mountains like we have in Wales."
"Do you miss Wales?" Tessa inquired. She wasn't sure why she did it; she knew asking Will about his past was like poking a dog with a sore tail, but she couldn't seem to help it.
Will shrugged lightly. "What's to miss? Sheep and singing," he said. "And the ridiculous language. Fe hoffwn i fod mor feddw, fyddai ddim yn cofio fy enw."
"What does that mean?"
"It means 'I wish to get so drunk I no longer remember my own name,' Quite useful."
"You don't sound very patriotic," observed Tessa. "Weren't you just reminiscing about the mountains?"
"Patriotic?" Will looked smug. "I'll tell you what's patriotic," he said. "In honor of my birthplace, I've the dragon of Wales tattooed on my-"
"You're in a charming temper, aren't you, William?" interrupted Jem, though there was no edge to his voice. Still, having observed them now for some time, together and apart, Tessa knew it meant something when they call ed each other by their full first names instead of the familiar shortened forms. "Remember, Starkweather can't stand Charlotte, so if this is the mood you're in-"
"I promise to charm the dickens out of him," said Will, sitting up and readjusting his crushed hat. "I shall charm him with such force that when I am done, he Will be left lying limply on the ground, trying to remember his own name."
"The man's eighty-nine," muttered Jem. "He may well have that problem anyway."
"I suppose you're storing up all that charm now?" Tessa inquired. "Wouldn't want to waste any of it on us?"
"That's it exactly." Will sounded pleased. "And it isn't Charlotte the Starkweathers can't stand, Jem. It's her father."
"Sins of the fathers," said Jem. "They're not inclined to like any Fairchild, or anyone associated with one. Charlotte wouldn't even let Henry come up-"
"That is because every time one lets Henry out of the house on his own, one risks an international incident," said Will. "But yes, to answer your unasked question, I do understand the trust Charlotte has placed in us, and I do intend to behave myself. I don't want to see that squinty-eyed Benedict Lightwood and his hideous sons in charge of the Institute any more than anyone else does."
"They're not hideous," said Tessa.
Will blinked at her. "What?"
"Gideon and Gabriel," said Tessa. "They're really quite good-looking, not hideous at all."
"I spoke," said Will in sepulchral tones, "of the pitch-black inner depths of their souls."
Tessa snorted. "And what color do you suppose the inner depths of your soul are, Will Herondale?"
"Mauve," said Will.
Tessa looked over at Jem for help, but he only smiled. "Perhaps we should discuss strategy," he said. "Starkweather hates Charlotte but knows that she sent us. So how to worm our way into his good graces?"
"Tessa can utilize her feminine wiles," said Will. "Charlotte said he enjoys a pretty face."
"How did Charlotte explain my presence?" Tessa inquired, realizing belatedly that she should have asked this earlier.
"She didn't real y; she just gave our names. She was quite curt," said Will.
"I think it fal s to us to concoct a plausible story."
"We can't say I'm a Shadowhunter; he'l know immediately that I'm not. No Marks."
"And no warlock mark. He'l think she's a mundane," said Jem. "She could Change, but . . ."
Will eyed her speculatively. Though Tessa knew it meant nothing-worse than nothing, real y-she still felt his gaze on her like the brush of a finger across the back of her neck, making her shiver. She forced herself to return his look stonily. "Perhaps we could say she's a mad maiden aunt who insists on chaperoning us everywhere."
"My aunt or yours?" Jem inquired.
"Yes, she doesn't really look like either of us, does she? Perhaps she's a girl who's fal en madly in love with me and persists in following me wherever I go."
"My talent is shape-shifting, Will, not acting," said Tessa, and at that, Jem laughed out loud. Will glared at him.
"She had the better of you there, Will," he said. "It does happen sometimes, doesn't it? Perhaps I should introduce Tessa as my fiancee. We can tell mad old Aloysius that her Ascension is underway."
"Ascension?" Tessa remembered nothing of the term from the Codex.
Jem said, "When a Shadowhunter wishes to marry a mundane-"
"But I thought that was forbidden?" Tessa asked, as the train slid into a tunnel. It was dark suddenly in their compartment, though she had the feeling nevertheless that Will was looking at her, that shivering sense that his gaze was on her somehow.
"It is. Unless the Mortal Cup is used to turn that mundane into a Shadowhunter. It is not a common result, but it does happen. If the Shadowhunter in question applies to the Clave for an Ascension for their partner, the Clave is required to consider it for at least three months.
Meanwhile, the mundane embarks on a course of study to learn about Shadowhunter culture-"
Jem's voice was drowned out by the train whistle as the locomotive emerged from the tunnel. Tessa looked at Will, but he was staring fixedly out the window, not looking at her at all. She must have imagined it.
"It's not a bad idea, I suppose," said Tessa. "I do know rather a lot; I've finished nearly all of the Codex."
"It would seem reasonable that I brought you with me," said Jem. "As a possible Ascender, you might want to learn about Institutes other than the one in London." He turned to Will. "What do you think?"
"It seems as fine an idea as any." Will was still looking out the window; the countryside had grown less green, more stark. There were no vil ages visible, only long swathes of gray-green grass and outcroppings of black rock.
"How many Institutes are there, other than the one in London?" Tessa asked.
Jem ticked them off on his hands. "In Britain? London, York, one in Cornwal -near Tintagel-one in Cardiff, and one in Edinburgh. They're all smal er, though, and report to the London Institute, which in turn reports to Idris."
"Gideon Lightwood said he was at the Institute in Madrid. What on earth was he doing there?"
"Faffing about, most likely," said Will.
"Once we finish our training, at eighteen," said Jem, as if Will hadn't spoken, "we're encouraged to travel, to spend time at other Institutes, to experience something of Shadowhunter culture in new places. There are always different techniques, local tricks to be learned. Gideon was away for only a few months. If Benedict called him back so soon, he must think that his acquisition of the Institute is assured." Jem looked troubled.
"But he's wrong," Tessa said firmly, and when the troubled look didn't leave Jem's gray eyes, she cast about for something to change the subject.
"Where is the Institute in New York?"
"We haven't memorized all their addresses, Tessa." There was something in Will 's voice, a dangerous undercurrent. Jem looked at him narrowly, and said: "Is everything all right?"
Will took his hat off and laid it on the seat next to him. He looked at them both steadily for a moment, his gaze level. He was beautiful to look at as always, Tessa thought, but there seemed something gray about him, almost faded. For someone who so often seemed to burn very brightly, that light in him seemed exhausted now, as if he had been rol ing a rock up a hil like Sisyphus. "Too much to drink last night," he said final y.
Really, why do you bother, Will? Don't you realize we both know you're lying? Tessa almost said, but one look at Jem stopped her. His gaze as he regarded Will was worried-very worried indeed, though Tessa knew he did not believe Will about the drinking, any more than she did. But, "Well," was all he said, lightly, "if only there were a Rune of Sobriety."
"Yes." Will looked back at him, and the strain in his expression relaxed slightly. "If we might return to discussing your plan, James. It's a good one, save one thing." He leaned forward. "If she is meant to be affianced to you, Tessa Will need a ring."
"I had thought of that," said Jem, startling Tessa, who had imagined he had come up with this Ascendant idea on the spot. He slipped his hand into his waistcoat pocket and drew out a silver ring, which he held out to Tessa on his palm. It was not unlike the silver ring Will often wore, though where Will 's had a design of birds in flight, this one had a careful etching of the crenel ations of a castle tower around it. "The Carstairs family ring," he said.
"If you would . . ."
She took it from him and slipped it onto her left ring finger, where it seemed to magical y fit itself. She felt as if she ought to say something like It's lovely, or Thank you, but of course this wasn't a proposal, or even a gift.
It was simply an acting prop. "Charlotte doesn't wear a wedding ring," she said. "I hadn't realized Shadowhunters did."
"We don't," said Will. "It is customary to give a girl your family ring when you become engaged, but the actual wedding ceremony involves exchanging runes instead of rings. One on the arm, and one over the heart."
"'Set me as a seal upon thine heart, as a seal upon thine arm: for love is strong as death; jealousy is cruel as the grave,'" said Jem. "Song of Solomon."
"'Jealousy is cruel as the grave'?" Tessa raised her eyebrows. "That's not . . . very romantic."
"'The coals thereof are coals of fire, which hath a most vehement flame,'"
said Will, quirking his eyebrows up. "I always thought females found the idea of jealousy romantic. Men, fighting over you . . ."
"Well, there aren't any graves in mundane wedding ceremonies," said Tessa. "Though your ability to quote the Bible is impressive. Better than my aunt Harriet's."
"Did you hear that, James? She just compared us to her aunt Harriet."
Jem, as always, was unruffled. "We must be on familiar terms with all religious texts," he said. "To us they are instruction manuals."
"So you memorize them all in school?" She realized she had seen neither Will nor Jem at their studies since she had been at the Institute. "Or rather, when you are tutored?"
"Yes, though Charlotte's rather fal en off in tutoring us lately, as you might imagine," said Will. "One either has a tutor or one is schooled in Idris-that is, until you attain your majority at eighteen. Which Will be soon, thankful y, for the both of us."
"Which one of you is older?"
"Jem," said Will, and "I am," said Jem, at the same time. They laughed in unison as well, and Will added, "Only by three months, though."
"I knew you'd feel compel ed to point that out," said Jem with a grin.
Tessa looked from one of them to the other. There could not be two boys who looked more different, or who had more different dispositions. And yet.
"Is that what it means to be parabatai?" she said. "Finishing each other's sentences and the like? Because there isn't much on it in the Codex."
Will and Jem looked at each other. Will shrugged first, casual y. "It is rather difficult to explain," he said loftily. "If you haven't experienced it-"
"I meant," Tessa said, "you cannot-I don't know-read each other's minds, or the like?"
Jem made a spluttering noise. Will 's lambent blue eyes widened. "Read each other's minds? Horrors, no."
"Then, what's the point? You swear to guard each other, I understand that, but aren't all Shadowhunters meant to do that for each other?"
"It's more than that," said Jem, who had stopped spluttering and spoke somberly. "The idea of parabatai comes from an old tale, the story of Jonathan and David. 'And it came to pass . . . that the soul of Jonathan was knit with the soul of David, and Jonathan loved him as his own soul. . . . Then Jonathan and David made a covenant, because he loved him as his own soul.' They were two warriors, and their souls were knit together by Heaven, and out of that Jonathan Shadowhunter took the idea of parabatai, and encoded the ceremony into the Law."
"But it doesn't just have to be two men. It can be a man and a woman, or two women?"
"Of course." Jem nodded. "You have only eighteen years to find and choose a parabatai. Once you are older than that, the ritual is no longer open to you. And it is not merely a matter of promising to guard each other. You must stand before the Council and swear to lay down your life for your parabatai. To go where they go, to be buried where they are buried. If there were an arrow speeding toward Will, I would be bound by oath to step in front of it."
"Handy, that," said Will.
"And he, of course, is bound to do the same for me," said Jem. "Whatever he may say to the contrary, Will does not break oaths, or the Law." He looked hard at Will, who smiled faintly and stared out the window.
"Goodness," said Tessa. "That's all very touching, but I don't see exactly how it confers any advantages."
"Not everyone has a parabatai," said Jem. "Very few of us, actual y, find one in the all otted time. But those who do can draw on the strength of their parabatai in battle. A rune put on you by your parabatai is always more potent than one you put on yourself, or one put on by another. And there are some runes we can utilize that no other Shadowhunter can, because they draw on our doubled power."
"But what if you decide that you don't want to be parabatai anymore?"
Tessa asked curiously. "Can the ritual be broken?"
"Dear God, woman," said Will. "Are there any questions you don't want to know the answer to?"
"I don't see the harm in tell ing her." Jem's hands were folded atop his cane. "The more she knows, the better she Will be able to pretend she plans to Ascend." He turned to Tessa. "The ritual cannot be broken save in a few situations. If one of us were to become a Downworlder or a mundane, then the binding is cut. And of course, if one of us were to die, the other would be free. But not to choose another parabatai. A single Shadowhunter cannot take part in the ritual more than once."
"It is like being married, isn't it," said Tessa placidly, "in the Catholic church. Like Henry the Eighth; he had to create a new religion just so he could escape from his vows."
"Til death do us part," said Will, his gaze still fixed on the countryside speeding past outside the window.
"Well, Will won't need to create a new religion just to be rid of me," said Jem. "He'l be free soon enough."
Will looked over sharply, but it was Tessa who spoke. "Don't say that," she admonished Jem. "A cure could still be found. I don't see any reason to abandon all hope."
She almost shrank back at the look Will bent on her: blue, blazing, and furious. Jem seemed not to notice as he replied, calmly and unaffectedly. "I haven't abandoned hope," he said. "I just hope for different things than you do, Tessa Gray."
Hours went by after that, hours during which Tessa nodded off, her head propped against her hand, the dull sound of the train's wheels winding its way into her dreams. She woke at last with Jem shaking her gently by the shoulders, the train whistle blowing, and the guard shouting out the name of York station. In a flurry of bags and hats and porters they descended to the platform. It was nowhere near as crowded as Kings Cross, and covered by a far more impressive arched glass and iron roof, through which could be glimpsed the gray-black sky.
Platforms stretched as far as the eye could see; Tessa, Jem, and Will stood on the one closest to the main body of the station, where great gold- faced railway clocks proclaimed the time to be six o'clock. They were farther north now, and the sky had already begun to darken to twilight.
They had only just gathered beneath one of the clocks when a man stepped out of the shadows. Tessa barely suppressed a start at the sight of him. He was heavily cloaked, wearing a black oilskin-looking hat, and boots like an old sailor. His beard was long and white, his eyes crested with thick white eyebrows. He reached out and laid a hand on Will 's shoulder.
"Nephilim?" he said, his voice gruff and thickly accented. "Is it you?"
"Dear God," said Will, putting his hand over his heart in a theatrical gesture. "It's the Ancient Mariner who stoppeth one of three."
"Ah'm 'ere at t'bequest of Aloysius Starkweather. Art t'lads he wants or not? Ah've not got all night to stand about."
"Important appointment with an albatross?" Will inquired. "Don't let us keep you."
"What my mad friend means to say," said Jem, "is that we are indeed Shadowhunters of the London Institute. Charlotte Branwel sent us. And you are . . . ?"
"Gottshall," the man said gruffly. "Me family's been serving the Shadowhunters of the York Institute for nigh on three centuries now. I can see through tha' glamours, young ones. Save for this one," he added, and turned his eyes on Tessa. "If there's a glamour on the girl, it's summat I've never seen before."
"She's a mundane-an Ascendant," Jem said quickly. "Soon to be my wife." He took Tessa's hand protectively, and turned it so that Gottshal could see the ring on her finger. "The Council thought it would be beneficial for her to see another Institute besides London's."
"Has Mr. Starkweather been told aught about this?" Gottshal asked, black eyes keen beneath the rim of his hat.
"It depends what Mrs. Branwel told him," said Jem.
"Well, I hope she told him something, for yer sakes," said the old servant, raising his eyebrows. "If there's a man in t' world who hates surprises more than Aloysius Starkweather, Ah've yet to meet the bast-beggar. Begging your pardon, miss."
Tessa smiled and inclined her head, but inside, her stomach was churning.
She looked from Jem to Will, but both boys were calm and smiling. They were used to this sort of subterfuge, she thought, and she was not. She had played parts before, but never as herself, never wearing her own face and not someone else's. For some reason the thought of lying without a false image to hide behind terrified her. She could only hope that Gottshal was exaggerating, though something-the glint in his eye as he regarded her, perhaps-told her that he wasn't.