chapter Twenty-Five
Emily
“We need to talk.” Jake didn’t bother with pleasantries when I opened the door.
“What’s wrong?” I’d just put Noah down and was ready to go to sleep myself. That is until I saw Jake’s face. He looked horrible.
“Why didn’t you tell me about your brother?”
“What?” I felt sick. It couldn’t be a coincidence that he was asking about my brother when Austen was in town.
“Did Austen come to see you?” I wrapped my arms around myself.
“Answer me, Emily.”
“I didn’t know how.” I looked down.
“What does that mean? How could you not know how?”
“I didn’t want you to think he had anything to do with why I was with you. Or that I was trying to mess with you or anything.”
“What am I supposed to think now? We’ve been together for months, you’re supposed to be moving in with me, and you lied to me about your brother.”
“I didn’t lie.”
“Fine. You misled me.”
“I don’t know what you want me to say.”
“I don’t know. I don’t know what to think. If I didn’t love you so damn much I’d probably just walk out the door, but I can’t. Why are you with me? Why did you want to date me in the first place? Is it because of him? Do you want to fix me, make sure I don’t screw up like he did?” The absolute despair on his face almost killed me.
“No. Or maybe there was some of that when I gave you my number, but it all changed.”
“Why? Why did it change?”
“I fell for you. I fell completely in love with you.” I put my arms around him. “I didn’t want to change you, because I fell for you the way you are.”
“I want to believe that.”
“Then believe it. It’s true.” I knew he had every right to be mad. I should have told him about my brother, but how could I?
“Are there any more secrets? You kept both Noahs from me, and I need to know if there are any more surprises.”
“I understand if this changes things…” I refused to cry. I couldn’t. My life was just a series of mistakes.
“I’m not letting you go. I need you, Emily. I don’t care if you only dated me at first in some misguided attempt to save me, because the truth is you did save me. For the first time in years, I’m happy. I’m not losing you.” He took my head in his hands.
“You’re wrong, Jake.”
“No. I’m not.”
“You’re the one who saved me. You think you’re the only one who’s finally happy? I love Noah, love him more than life itself, but I didn’t feel like this. I didn’t feel alive until I met you.”
His lips brushed against mine. “No more secrets.”
“I promise.”
“Then I need to come clean.”
“About what?”
“Austen came by after practice.”
“So?”
“So? Don’t you want to know why I’m only here now?”
“Okay.” I leaned into him more.
“I picked up a bottle of Jack Daniels and poured myself a drink. I didn’t know what else to do. I was so damn close to taking a sip too, but then I stepped on one of those trains of Noah’s. I poured the glass and the whole damn bottle out.”
“That took three hours?”
“I went for a walk and ended up at Cole’s. He’s the one who drove me here.”
“I love you.” I kissed him.
“I love you too.”
He pulled me against him. “Can I stay? I doubt Cole’s willing to come back to get me.”
“I wasn’t going to let you leave.”
He smiled. “I don’t think I can sleep yet.”
“Me either. I need to show you something.” I took his hand and led him into my room. I dug out the photo album I kept in my bed stand.
I handed it to Jake, and sat down next to him on the bed. “This is who Noah’s named after.”
I started with the pictures of us as kids, and we moved through them until I found the one of us at his high school graduation. “He was an incredible brother. An incredible person.”
“I’m sure he was.”
I leaned my head against his shoulder. “I’m glad you’re here. I couldn’t sleep alone.”
“Just a few more weeks, and you’ll never sleep alone again.”
I leaned over and kissed him. “Neither will you.”