Wolf at the Door

chapter Thirty-one



Edward had no idea how it had happened, but one moment he was skulking just outside the alley, freaking out—

What the hell is Rachael doing there?

—and the moment after that he was dangling in the air from the fists of a shockingly strong man.

“I have not yet decided how dangerous you are. Shall we discuss it, you and I?”

Finally! Someone who dressed and spoke appropriately for a paranormal moment. From what he could see (though things were already going fuzzy around the edges) the guy was huge, tall, broad-shouldered, and dressed in black.

“Outstanding! We gonna talk about it while I die from—gggkkkk!—oxygen deprivation? Or no, wait! Kkkkkk! You can throw me off the roof. Could you say you shall rue the day you crossed my path in your deep scary voice while you throw me off a roof?”

“But for my love,” Dark Dude muttered, “I would tolerate none of this.” He dropped him, and Edward flopped to the ground, coughing and gazing up at Dark Dude.

“You got it right,” he said happily. “You got it all right. I’m . . . I’m just so happy. I’ve been waiting my whole life for someone like you.”

“Alas, I am happily, deliriously, eternally married,” he said dryly. “And I must say, don’t think I’ve ever seen that reaction before. Why are you here?”

“I’m spying for my best friend, a vampire slayer,” he replied promptly. He never hesitated to tell a vampire the truth, with Boo and Greg’s fervid encouragement. It had saved his life more than once. The vamp would often get so rattled he or she forgot all about Edward in their haste to get the hell out of Dodge. “And you guys are gonna get it! Zombies and evil baby farms. Be ashamed!”

“I have not the vaguest idea what you are talking about. And I suspect I do not want to.”

“She put you up to this, right?” It was starting to make sense. Horrible, horrible sense. Well, you knew all along Rachael was too good to be true. And now you know why. “I should have seen it. I really should have.”

“You sound a bit like Cape Cod.”

“I don’t have a Cape accent,” he retorted.

“You do, actually, a slight one. That means you’re from the coast . . . and that means you are acquainted with Ghost.”

Duh. Of course this guy knew who Boo was. Her fearsome reputation had obviously spread to the Midwest. Well, it saved time. He wouldn’t have to tell Dark Dude who she was and why he should be deeply terrified.

“Yeah, that’s right, pal. And when she gets here, and sees that you’ve mangled me even a little bit, she’ll take it out on your undead ass.”

“Excellent.”

“What?”

“You must call her straightaway.”

“What?”

Dark Dude made an impatient gesture. “I have been aware of her for some time. And I believe she is aware of the recent regime change.”

“Totally aware,” he lied, having no idea what Dark Dude was talking about.

“Yes. So. Please call her at once and ask her to visit.”

“Dude. If I call Ghost for a visit, the death count will hit two figures, guaranteed.”

“Do it. As soon as you can. And make sure she has our address.”

“Our address?”

“It’s in the newsletter,” he said impatiently.

“Yeah, about the newsletter . . . don’t you think it’s big-time dumb to—”

“I don’t like this. Not any of it. Run along and call for help, little man. I must see to the queen’s safety.”

“Oh . . . her? She doesn’t need protecting. She’s in a class by herself.” The lying faithless bitch.

“How wise of you to know it.”

“Uh . . . how are you walking around in daylight?”

“Call it a perk of royalty.”

“I call it freaky and big-time strange. Aren’t you going to, I dunno, try to bite me, or threaten me with hideous mutilation, or something?”

“Make sure Ghost has the address. You might want to give her directions, just in case. Or you could just drive her straight over.”

“Sure,” he said, beyond mystified. “I’ll get right on that.”

“Excellent. Oh, and young man? If I catch you skulking near my love even once more, I will pull your spine out through your mouth.”

Now that was more like it! “Do your worst, you foul nightstalking ghoul of the . . . where’d you go?”

The guy had done a total Batman . . . left while Edward was still getting his bearings.

If not for the awful thing he’d found out, it would have been the most exciting encounter of his life. Well. After bluff sex.