This Love of Mine (Raine Series #1)

CHAPTER 15

Kayla

I had been elated to see him. When his tall, muscular figure appeared over that hill, my heart jumped into my throat and practically shot out of my mouth. He looked even better than he had in town. Maybe it was because he didn't have a skanky tramp hanging off of him, but either way, I knew I wanted him. And when his lips pressed softly against mine, I was all but in heaven.

My day had gone from mundane, to exciting in less than four hours. His scorching emerald green eyes had me at a loss for words and short of breath. But, as soon as he mentioned Arizona, my whole world shifted and my mind quickly threw up a wall and completely shut down. How were we ever supposed to make anything work, when he was going back to the very state I had just left? Granted, he wasn't aware of the situation or anything that had happened in between then and now, but would it really matter now?

What was I even thinking? We weren't anything. We had just met and I was definitely readin' too far into anything with him. For crying out loud, he was eighteen and off to college and I had just barely turned seventeen and was starting my senior year in high school. What type of relationship could we even have?

I knew pushing him away, was the wrong thing to do, but at this point, I needed to protect myself. Madison's feelings be damned. I still wanted more than anything, to go see his band play tonight, so I made sure to ask him about it before I headed home. Part of me was excited that he was bringing me into his world with the way he was. It was a nice world filled with hope, happiness and somethin' else I just couldn't quite put my finger on.

As I walked away from this amazing guy and the blissful hour I could have had with him, I pulled my phone from my pocket and dialed the one person I knew would always be there.

"Hello." Her voice rang high and happy. What I wouldn't give to feel that type of happiness at this moment.

"Hi love. How's it going?" I tried to make my voice more chipper than I felt, but she of course saw right through me.

"What's wrong? And don't you dare lie to me?"

I took in a deep breath before explaining Madison, his grandparents and everything in between. I didn't leave out one iota of information and I knew her mind was reeling with all that I had given her to think about. I waited patiently for her to respond and after a clear two minutes had passed, I pushed her.

"Well?" I panted. I hadn't realized where I was going until I had reached the other end of my grandparent's property. "Cami, you're killing me. Please say something." I urged.

"Sorry, I was just trying to digest everything. So, a cowboy huh?"

I moaned loudly. "Seriously, that's what you narrowed in on?"

"Uh, duh. Do you know how long I have waited to be able to go out to your grandparent's farm, just so I could meet me a tall, dark and handsome cowboy. Mmmhmmm."

I shook my head and let out a loud laugh that echoed off of the nearby trees. Leave it to Cami to make me feel better, all by talking about a damn cowboy, when it was the one thing I didn't want to think about.

"Kay, the only thing I can tell you is to hold onto your cowboy boots, because I'm pretty sure he is going to take you for one hell of a ride."

"Ya know, if I wanted to get sarcasm, I would've just talked to my granddad about all this. You're so not helpin' the situation, bitch."

"I love how your accent comes back the minute your tiny little feet hit that Texas soil. Well, I guess the question is, are you willing to see where it goes and possibly come back here?"

I knew she was serious by the intensity in her tone. I didn't want to think about going back to Arizona, ever. I suppose it was a good question though. "Honestly, I don't know if any guy would be worth that pain." I hadn't hesitated in my response, because in all actuality, I wasn't even sure this thing that was happening between me and Madison, was even the real deal. I still needed to finish high school, he was headed off to college, and he had a band. I mean what future did we really have?

"Well honey, I guess that's what you need to figure out first and foremost. Kay, just don't hold anything back. I know how hard it is going to be for you to open up and let someone in, but I think you owe it to yourself to try. Take this move as a chance to explore the real you, all of you, if you catch my drift." Her laugh brought a smile to my face and I couldn't help but giggle right along with her.

"I'll talk to you soon, Cam. Take care."

"Oh I will." She laughed. "Love ya, girly."

"Me too." I closed my phone and sat down under one of the tall oak trees, swaying in the breeze. I laid back and stared at the afternoon sun through the sparse branches hovering above me. Why did life have to be so complicated so early on? Of course I blame my mother, or maybe my father. Oh hell, I'll just blame everyone else and take no responsibility, that sounded better. I'd rather be arrogantly oblivious than have to deal with my life.

*****

I must've dozed off in my hasty state, because when I came to, the sun was no longer shining brightly above me. I quickly checked the time on my phone and realized that I barely had a half an hour to get ready. I brushed the stray pieces of grass and leaves from my hair and hobbled my way to the house. I hadn't seen my grandmamma since we had gotten back, and I was now starting to feel a little guilty about it. I had let the day get away from me and I needed to find her and apologize.

When I entered through the back door, I was startled when a small hand grasped the screen door behind me and clutched my arm. I jumped back in full on protection mode, as my eyes wandered up the frail arm, landing on my grandmamma's weary eyes.

"I'm sorry, sweetheart. I didn't mean to startle ya."

I let out the small breath I had been holding, pulling my small grandmother into my chest and closing my arms around her. I hadn't hugged her or my granddad to say thank you since I had arrived, and now was the prime opportunity to let her know how grateful I was.

"Thank you, Grams."

"What ever for, darlin'?

Her eyes wandered up to mine and I squeezed mine shut tightly, trying not to let the tears escape down my face. "For welcoming me into your home. For givin' me a home." I smiled.

She lightly slapped my upper arm, pulling out of my embrace. "You silly girl. Ya don't need to thank your granddaddy or me. We love ya more than anything else. This is your home now."

I pressed a gentle kiss to the top of her head, before heading for the stairs. "Oh and Grams, is it okay if I go out for a bit tonight?" I turned with my foot on the step, waiting for what, I didn't know, but I guess I was hoping more than anything that she didn't say no.

"Of course, sweetheart. Ya need to be in by midnight, ya hear."

I nodded in agreement and made it halfway up the stairs before I heard her small voice carry. "Oh and tell Madison, I say hello."

I froze mid-stride and tried to slow my erratic breathing before turning all the way around to look down at my grandmamma. "How did ya know?" I breathed.

"Oh honey, I know the effect of the Raine men, and I would recognize it anywhere. Now hurry up and get yourself ready to leave before your granddaddy gets home. I don't reckon he'll like this a whole lot."

There were a million and one questions blazing through my mind, but I thought better of it and finished my hike upstairs. What did she mean by that? The Raine effect? I laughed at myself.

Ridiculous.

I rummaged through my new clothes, trying to find the perfect outfit for tonight, but found myself coming up empty handed. I threw myself onto the small bed, covering my eyes with my arm. It didn't matter what I wore, I'm pretty sure there would be enough girls there trying to get his attention, that he wouldn't even notice me.

I sat up and glanced down at the pile of clothing in front of me, when it all but jumped out at me. A short white and yellow striped sundress lay there staring back at me. I reached for it and smiled knowing that this, paired with my boots were a deadly combination. I quickly threw my shorts and tank onto the floor in the corner of my room.

I pulled the off the shoulder sundress over my head, and pulled my hair out from under it. I let the half naturally curly mane flow down my back, even though the heat had me wanting to pull it up. I brushed on more than a normal amount of mascara for me. I knew it was going to be dark at the bar, but I needed to stand out a little bit more than normal.

I swiped a bronze colored eye shadow across my lids and then dabbed a small amount of lip-gloss on. I stood back staring at my look, nodding. I tugged my boots on and made my way down the stairs. My grandmamma stared up at me with an adoring smile splayed across her face. I smiled in return and quickly grabbed my phone from where I had left it earlier and my small brown purse that was sitting on the table. I turned to glance at my grams one last time, before I headed out the front door.

I walked a little ways down to the main road, just so Madison didn't have to come all the way up the long drive. When I saw his truck appear, I had to hold myself together. I immediately wanted to jump up, throwing my legs and arms around him, but I couldn't. Not only due to my injury, but because what would that say about me?

He pulled up next to me and a small cloud of dust blew past as he put the truck in park. He rounded the corner of the front end and stopped, staring. The expression on his face was unreadable and I glanced down at myself, wondering what was wrong. He still stood unmoving, and I suddenly became extremely self-conscious.

"What is it? Do I have something on me?" I frantically moved my hands across and down my dress and then across my face.

A smile tugged at the corners of his mouth and before I could respond to his rude behavior, he was standing directly in front of me. His hand went up to my hair, tucking a small amount behind my ear.

"You look absolutely beautiful."

I blushed at his genuineness and I smiled up at his gleaming face. Before I could respond, I couldn't help but take in his appearance. I know I hadn't known him long, but he looked damn near perfect in this moment. He had on a pair of dark wash, low slung straight-legged jeans, which formed to the muscles I knew he held underneath them.

His purple and black plaid, button up shirt, was only fastened half way up with a solid black T-shirt underneath. And just when I thought it couldn't get any better, I glanced over and saw all of his ink on display. He had his shirtsleeves rolled up to his elbows and the meticulously crafted tattoos stared, urging me to touch them.

As I made my way back up his body, my eyes skimmed right past his face and straight to the top of his head. His always baseball cap sheathed head was now free of the binding material. His hair was a beautiful shade of brown and I wanted more than anything to run my hands through its thickness. It was shorter than I had first thought and I accredited it to the fact that his baseball cap more than likely pushed it down, making it appear longer.

When I made my way back down to his eyes, I wished I hadn't. He was staring at me knowingly, and I almost gasped at the intensity of it. In two days, this boy had gotten under my skin more than anyone I'd ever known. I replayed my conversation with Cami over and over and finally decided to let myself live.

I reached my hands up into that dark thick muddled mess and pulled his lips down onto mine. I tugged gently, trying to pull him further into me. His hands snaked around my waist, but I could feel the hesitation in his touch.

As I pulled back, his eyes caught mine and I couldn't stop the smile that spread from ear to ear. His hand slid down the backside of my dress and grazed the back of my thigh as he helped me up into the cab of the truck. He placed a gentle soft kiss to the back of my hand just before he closed the door and ran around the front of the truck, and into the driver seat. Our eyes connected one last time as he threw the truck into drive and we headed out towards town.

We were only a few minutes away from the town limits, when I decided to strategically place my hand in the middle of the bench seat. I needed to know if the feelings I had were going to be reciprocated and when he settled his hand on top of mine, I smiled in triumph.

When we pulled up to the small bar at the end of the main street through town, I suddenly felt the emptiness as he pulled his hand away. I wasn't exactly sure how this night was going to play out, but I was hoping and praying that I would end up sprawled across the seat of his truck. Oh my god, what was I even saying. It's not like I was a virgin. My ex had made me do things, only people much older than I, had ever experienced. But everything just felt so unexplored and new with Madison.

I blushed at the memories, when I caught sight of Madison walking around the front of the truck to fetch me from my side. I reached for the handle just as he flung the door open. I glanced up at him and noticed his demeanor had changed from sweet and soft, to hard and unreadable. Well, if that was how he was playing it, then I would just show him that two could play that game.

His hand reached for mine so he could help me jump down out of the truck. I looked directly into his eyes and smiled a tight smile, just before stating very matter of factly. "I can do it on my own, cowboy." I winked and he stood back abashed. Finally, he would know just how it felt to be in my position.